Plot Thief
by Umodin
Summary: When a thief by trade is reincarnated into the toddler body of one Raiga Uzumaki, missing Godson of Tsunade Senju and Jinchuriki of the Nanabi no Kabutomushi he understands one thing: this was gunna suck. Still, he mused, there was so much he could do for the people of this world! He could stop everything before it- Nah. Let's just mess with the main characters. OC Self-Insert
1. Prologue

Tsunade Senju, age 35, was currently gawking. Why would she be, and more importantly why would it matter?

It all started out with the sun rising, Tsunade was currently gallivanting around the country in celebration and depression. Celebration due to the 3rd Shinobi War finally coming to a close thanks to Jiraiya's brat Minato and depression due to the reminder that even when the war was done and over with, she was still alone. Her brother, lover, parents, grandparents, granduncle and whatnot were all dead.

During said gallivanting, Tsunade came across a sight she had seen only twice in her life. She was currently in the Yu no Kuni, planning on enjoying some well deserved time to rest, relax, sulk and get smashed. As she entered one of the hot springs that the country was so aptly named for that she came across the rare sight.

A woman, or at least this better be in the woman else there will be issue's, likely in her late twenties with hair so red it reminded her of blood. The only people she knew with such hair were her belated grandmother Mito and her little protégé Kushina. Both were born and bred Uzumaki.

Which meant this woman was likely an Uzumaki. Which meant, however distant, she was related to this woman in front of her.

Now Tsunade was generally not the type of person to strike up a conversation, especially when sharing a bath with a stranger. But damnit! Relatives were relatives!

"So… You from around here?"

The crimson haired woman jumped slightly before turning her eyes upon Tsunade. If Tsunade was only curious before she now knew factually that this woman was an Uzumaki based on those violet eyes. It was also obvious the woman was pregnant based on that baby bump.

"…No, I'm just stopping by here for the week before heading to Mizu."

"Mizu? Why would you want to go there? Hell! Kumo is better than Mizu and they spent half the war trying to steal Bloodlines!"

The Uzumaki narrowed her eyes and gave Tsunade a once-over, "You are a very rude person, has anybody told you that? Telling me about where I should and shouldn't go without even giving a name."

Tsunade blinked, scowled then snorted in a matter of a second, "Tsunade Senju."

"Toka Uzumaki."

"Thought so, Uzumaki have very distinctive traits."

"Whether or not my departed clan has 'distinctive traits' is irrelevant. What is relevant though is why you feel where I go is you concern." Her eye's narrowed into slits and muscles tensed, like she was expecting an attack.

Tsunade shrugged, sinking further into the hotspring's water, "You're an Uzumaki. There's only one other I know of and she's… 18 or 19 if memory serves. Our clans were close before everything happened and honestly? I'm asking because relatives are rare."

Toka blinked slowly before she gave a sigh, "I don't know if it's because of this buzz or this wonderful water but fine, it's not like it's a secret or anything. I'm heading to Mizu to give birth and force this kid on his father before I head off on my way."

This was a concept Tsunade couldn't get her head around entirely, "So… You're pregnant, but you don't want the kid… So you're offing it to Mizu for some reason? Do you know the likelihood that you'll find the kids father in such a huge place?"

Toka gave a shrug, "I know who the father is, Raiga Kurosuki; an apprentice to the current wielder of the Kiba Blades. I admit I shouldn't have lain with the man, but his master - who might I add was much more attractive - offered me good money to get rid of his virginity. He didn't trust whores or the like due to diseases and Raiga himself apparently liked my hair. In any case, after that happened I noticed I hadn't had my monthly when I normally did. One thing led to another and I learned I was pregnant."

Tsunade was trying hard not to groan. So this Toka whored herself out and turned out pregnant. That wasn't a big deal, people got pregnant with bastards commonly; at least it didn't happen by force. But really… Did this woman think this Raiga character would take a child when he was likely to either kill her or tell her to piss off?

"You do know he likely won't care either way… right?"

Toka seemed to take that comment in stride as she melted further into the spring, "I know, but the moment that I learned I was pregnant, and let me add I hadn't had sex for nearly 5 months since Raiga, it was obvious who the father was. And I promised myself I wouldn't bother with kids since every village and their mothers want Uzumaki kids for whatever reason. I'd rather spend my days just wandering, occasionally getting some fun in a bar before hitting my next stop, y'know?"

And Tsunade did, partially at least. She herself was the last Senju, and she was constantly pressured by her village to have a kid to continue the clan. The idea of children never bothered her, what did bother her is the father. She always envisioned herself starting a family with her late lover Dan. When he died, so too did any desire to have children. Still, she wasn't to type of woman to go clubbing and having one night stands like Toka apparently did, but she could understand the sentiment.

"Why don't you just give birth in Konoha? The Uzumaki have always been held in great respect there. Even if you never have another child shouldn't you try to make sure it has a decent future?"

Toka offered a shrug, "It is the way of my clan that if we are pregnant outside of marriage to seek out the father, regardless of status. True Kurosuki-san likely won't want the child, but at least I'd be doing right by my clan."

Tsunade stared at Toka, and damn did she stare hard before groaning. Damn her for having a heart, "Yeah, no."

"Hmm?"

"I'm not letting you bring a child, one of my few relatives left, to such an early death. Give birth with me around; I'm not the world's top medic for nothing. Once it's born I'll take it to Konoha and see if Kushina, the other Uzumaki I told you about, is interested."

Toka stared at Tsunade, until she abruptly stood out of the water, baby bump and all, grabbed a towel to protect her modestly and began to head out, "Honestly, I don't care who you are but I won't let you get in the way of my clan's tradition!"

Tsunade copied Toka by getting up herself, her assets jiggling with the motion, "Oh? Fine, let's talk clan. Toka, before the Uzu got sacked what was your station in the clan?"

She was wrapping the towel around herself, glaring at Tsunade but answering anyways, "My father was the secondary branch head to the Barrier corps."

"Right, that makes things easy. I am Tsunade Senju, granddaughter to Mito Uzumaki, a former heiress of Uzu. Kushina Uzumaki, the woman I mentioned in Konoha, is the current head of you family and it is your duty as a member of your clan to inform your head about your child. I am offering to do that in your stead provided that you allow me to help you give birth."

Toka stared and stared hard. Finally after what seemed like an internal debate her shoulders sagged and she nodded. This was such a nice day too until the Senju came around. All she planned to do was relax in the spring before heading back to her hotel room. Now she had to go with the tradition she was using to escape clan bylaws in order to give birth. Damn politics.

And idea came to her, evil yes, but really this bitch ruined her plan, "Fine, but I have a condition since you're forcing me into all this when we haven't known each other for an hour."

Tsunade raised an eyebrow but nodded, "Let's hear it."

"You're the things Godmother. Congratz~." Toka then skipped, _skipped_ , out of the bath, intent to escape the now wide-eyed Senju.

* * *

Toka had been pregnant for 6 months. Somehow she suckered Tsunade into becoming her traveling partner for the other 3 months of her pregnancy. During these months they generally just wandered around Yu no Kuni. Toka apparently hadn't planned on leaving for Mizu until she was on her 8th month anyways.

Tsunade for her part had just grit her teeth in annoyance for the first week of this. Though she eventually let up and struck a proper friendship with Toka Uzumaki. The friendship itself started out rough, naturally, but it grew into something akin to a pseudo-sisterhood in the aspect of how much they could annoy and tolerate eachother. Toka was an only child so she relished the idea while Tsunade never had a close female friend, so while yes Toka was a bitch, she was also a breath of fresh air in comparison to the village and the war.

It was this moment that was important. Toka's water had broken whilst they were on the south-eastern foothold of Yu no Kuni. A fitting place since it was at the border to Uzu. They were lucky enough to be in a fishing village at the time, they rented out a hotel room for 2 days and got to work.

5 hours later on July the 7th, a boy with a small tuft of red hair was born.

"Raiga…" Toka said weakly, she was tired and in immense pain and currently holding the newly dubbed Raiga to her breast. There was a problem with the birth and she had to have a C-section, her stomach was undergoing the process of being healed by Tsunade at the moment, "His name will be Raiga Uzumaki"

Tsunade offered a humorless chuckle as she continued to work on Toka's stomach, "Why name him after his father?"

"Tradition." Was her simple statement, "It is tradition that if that father doesn't- ow- doesn't know about the child, it will be given the father's name so it- _he_ has reason to seek him out."

Old traditions were preached by Toka and Tsunade had come to ignore most of the spew that came out of the younger womans mouth when it came to them. Some traditions were ridiculous and not worth mentioning, but Toka decided it was her duty to constantly go with some traditions and break others.

She was a woman with both strong and loose morals; an oxymoron in many cases.

"Tsunade…"

Tsunade was nearly done with the post-pregnancy healing so she could afford some distraction, "hmm?"

"You know how you said I needed to... present Raiga-chan here to my clan head right?"

She wasn't listening entirely to Toka, but she knew this was likely to be annoying, "Yeah? What about it?"

Though Toka was tired she smiled quite smugly, "Tradition states that I can't present my clan head my child until the child is 5; the age we learn our first bits of Fuinjutsu."

Tsunade just groaned while she worked, "And you didn't mention this why?"

"Because that'd give you time to come up with a different plan! No, now that Raiga-chan is born you're stuck with me for another 5 years!" She cackled lightly before coughing. It ruined the image but the annoyance in Tsunade was apparent.

* * *

Time passed and Toka and Tsunade had fallen into a routine. Toka performed her duty as a mother, no matter how loudly she proclaimed she regretted it and was responsible for the feeding of Raiga and making sure Tsunade didn't lose all their joint money gambling. Tsunade was responsible for medical care, naturally, and after losing a bet with Toka became the main diaper changer much to her chagrin.

Raiga himself was a very smart child they noticed. He had hair much like his mothers, though a lighter shade of red, his skin tone was darker than Toka's but not nearly as dark as his father, more along the lines of a proper combination, and amber eyes that were not from Toka or his father; it was assumed they were the same color of an ancestor. He only cried when his diaper needed to be changed or when he was hungry. Whenever he wanted something he always clapped at whatever it was and wiggled his fingers

Tsunade had performed many small tests on Raiga as he grew up and determined that he was under the category of genius. This was both a good and bad thing, for it meant he would be a natural with in Shinobi arts, but it also meant that the moment they returned to Konoha he'd be inlisted in the Academy and likely graduate soon after. She herself graduated at the age of 6 along with Jiraiya and Orochimaru during wartime pushes, but it was an experiment of the newly formed Academy and they weren't made into Chunin till 4 years later. It was never a good thing when a child was graduated early without peers the same age. The Sannin were not the sanest bunch, and she had no issue admitting that fact.

Time had passed for the strange trio until 3 years had come and gone. It was currently October 11 and they were in Gana no Gai, a border town in Taki no Kuni. Tsunade herself had not changed, though that was due to the fact that she refused to allow herself to show age and hid herself under a Genjutsu. Toka had grown older and shown it with the smallest wrinkles on the corners of her eyes. Raiga had begun reading and was beginning to speak in complete sentences, much to his mother and godmothers surprise.

It was a lazy day for them. Tsunade and Raiga were relaxing in an inn lobby whilst Toka was at a bar looking for a quick lay. Though she became a mother, Toka never gave up her tendencies, and when she had an itch Raiga became Tsunade's main company much to their mutual annoyance. Raiga, due to his uncanny sharpness understood slightly that his mother was doing something bad and Tsunade because she preferred to drink instead of babysit; at least Raiga was an easy child to sit.

An hour had passed and Toka returned with a pout on her face, "There weren't any decent lookers, and aside from a few Takigakure Shinobi none were worth the time." She had come to a personal conclusion that Shinobi had the most potent sperm. Thus, in order to ensure she had no more children she avoided sleeping with any of them.

Tsunade offered a grin "At least I don't have to hear about you complain about the bad sex." Tsunade herself wasn't the biggest fan of sex. She was willing to have it with the right people, and in the 3 years she had travelled with Uzumaki family had only lain with one man, who she only slept with due to a lost bet. Say what you will on her gambling habits but when she makes a bet that has nothing to do with money she always pulls through on them.

Toka offered a shrug, taking a seat next to Tsunade. She then picked Raiga up, placed him in her lap and played with his hair, "It's just an itch, we can't all be like you and not have an interest in the carnal delights."

Tsunade shuddered at that phrase, that was how Jiraiya spoke of sex, "Please don't talk like that, it honestly creeps me out-"

She was cut off from a summoning seal going off directly on her table. Katsuyu, Tsunade's personal summon appeared, **"Tsunade-hime, terrible news has happened in Konoha."**

Tsunade blinked, Katsuyu rare ever came to her without sacrifice of blood or chakra, whatever happened was serious, "What happened Katsuyu?"

 **"The Kyuubi no Yoko attacked Konoha yesterday, I only learned recently from Gamabunta-kun. Minato, his summoner and the Yondaime-sama died in order to seal it into an infant."**

Tsunade gaped, along with Toka whilst Raiga looked at Katsuyu in wonder, "But the Kyuubi was…"

Tsunade was one of the few people aware of the fact that Kushina held the Kyuubi. Her grandmother informed her about the Bijuu and her status as a Jinchuriki before the seal transferred to Kushina. If the Kyuubi got out then that meant that Kushina was either dead or near it.

"Toka." She said in her harshest tone, "I need to head to Konoha. Stay here with Raiga and I'll be back in a few days."

"How do I know you'll come back?" Toka was nothing if not blunt and she had reason to worry. Tsunade was her benefactor as well as the godmother of her child. The issue however was Tsunade was forced into both positions. Toka considered herself Tsunade's burden internally, though she'd never admit to it.

Tsunade stared at Toka with an unreadable expression; did she really think her to be so low? True they'd never spoken openly about their friendship, but it was one of the strongest bonds she'd ever held. She grunted to herself, removed her necklace and placed it over Toka's head, much to the mothers shock, "This is your proof. I'll come back for this."

"B-b-but this is your most prized possession!-"

"And it's proof I'll come back. This is serious Toka, I don't have time to pussyfoot around. My village was sacked by a Bijuu, I'm needed." Tsunade turned her attention to Katsuyu, "Katsuyu, I need you to head over to the village ahead of me and heal anybody that you can."

 **"Hai, Tsunade-hime."** She poofed away with that.

Tsunade ran out of the inn using speeds she hadn't bothered with for years.

* * *

Toka was busying herself with Raiga doing nothing of importance. It had been a day since Tsunade left and she was slowly growing accustomed to time away from the woman she had begun to view as a sister. Ever since Raiga had been born, they had never been away from each other for more than half a day.

Still, it was dreadfully boring with just Raiga around. Though she didn't care for him properly at first, Raiga had grown on her. She was originally cold to her son for existing. It took her the first year of his life when he spoke "Kaa-cha" that she became a proper mother, who could turn down such a smart boy? It wasn't like it was an issue, before Tsunade came around her entire goal was to give birth, show the then unnamed infant to Raiga Kurosuki and let him decide what to do. If he accepted it was his child but didn't want him, she'd bring it to an orphanage. If he took the child, all was well. If he wanted the child's death, it was his decision, but also his duty as the father to swing the blade.

Tsunade was kind enough to give her a smack to the face in reality that that was just cruel, and the fact that was tradition was likely due to the small size of Uzu and anybody that had a bastard was well known on the island.

Toka forgot that fact.

Still, Raiga was a good son. He was smart, Tsunade said he was a genius, so she couldn't wait to show him off to Kushina-sama; it was the pride of any parent to have a child that the clan head approved of.

Currently she was giving Raiga a bath in her hotel sink. Tsunade had left, so she could splurge a little; namely by renting a hotel room for the week. The last time she and Tsunade stayed at a hotel was when Toka herself won at gambling enough to override the difference Tsunade lost; something that has never happened since.

Raiga was splashing around lightly while she rinsed his hair, he had good hair she noted. Fairly straight but fluffy enough that it would spike lightly if he were to grow it out. His eyes were a piercing amber as well, and she supposed it was a good thing he primarily took after herself. Much that she didn't think about it, Raiga Kurosuki was not what one would consider handsome. Her Raiga it seemed would be a proper looker in the future.

"Kaa-chan! Suds 'n eyes!" She blinked at him, smiling lightly as she grabbed a towel and washed his eyelids and face.

As she finished bathing him she took notice of the only irregularity on his small body. A birthmark on the back of his left hand that had no inherent shape, but if one looked close enough it looked akin to a snake according to Tsunade; Toka just thought it was a squiggly line.

She put him in his toddler clothes and headed to the hotel lobby, intent on grabbing supper before sleeping early. As she made her down the stairs to the lobby, for her room was on the 3rd floor, her path was blocked by a trio of Taki Shinobi.

The Shinobi looked her over and grinned visciously, "Oi Suien! Check out the babe!"

She noted that the leader of the group that nameless grunt called out for looked feral in a way, his eyes were quite small and he wore his hair much like a mane.

He looked Toka over with a grin before his small eyes widened and his grin turned maniacal, "You're an Uzumaki ain'cha?"

She held his gaze evenly, shifting Raiga in her arms slightly as she did, "It's possible, does it matter?"

"It might, what's your name?"

"Toka." She paused for a moment before smiling softly at the bundle in her arms that Suien just noticed, "And this is Raiga."

Raiga mumbled a "hello"

Suein licked his lips, "Uzumaki be the lot that're good at Fuinjutsu, aye?"

She nodded slightly, perhaps he needed aid with a seal? If they'd leave her alone she'd give it a lookover at the very least.

"Right, men, slit her throat. Grab the baby; we're heading back to the village."

Her eyes widened and before she could say anything a kunai found its way to her throat. Toka Uzumaki lost her life in that moment.

Raiga began to cry and wail for his "KAA-CHAN!" much to Suien's annoyance, "Hand me the twerp, he's the prize tonight."

Suien cackled all the way back to Takigakure.

* * *

Suien and his team along with the now gagged Raiga found themselves in Takigakure not 4 hours later. Suien shooed his men away, offering them an insincere job well done before making his way to a house based on the roots of the Great Tree.

He walked up to the home, banged on the door roughly and loud enough to make the gagged Raiga to begin wail through his muzzle.

The door opened to a bald man with squinted eyes in a sleeping robe, "Suien? What are you doing here? It's… It's nearly midnight boy!"

"I know Honored Elder, but I have amazing news. On my patrol in Gana no Gai I came across a dying woman who offered her child to the village if I gave her a clean death. Her name was Toka Uzumaki."

The Elders squinted eyes widened in shock before looking directly at the infant, "You mean…"

"Raiga, that's the brats' name. You don't need to give your grandkid to the beast anymore!"

The Elder had been worried. His daughter was about to give birth in a couple of months and it was determined that unless he could find a suitable replacement, his grandchild would become the village weapon. Now, Suien had brought him his families salvation, "Give me the boy, I will alert the council tomorrow, and by the end of the week Takigakure will have its new weapon."

Suien held the baby tightly making Raiga fidget around in his steel grip, "Now now Honored Elder, I went through the trouble of bringing this boy to you and all… The least you could do is compensate me properly."

The Elder grit his teeth but his excitement overrode his aggravation at the brazen words of his Shinobi, "Suien, congratulations on completing your first S-rank mission then, we'll have your pay once the weapon is completed."

Suiens smirk was full of malice and greed as he handed Raiga to the Elder. He offered a bow to the man before leave with a skip in his step.

The Elder looked to Raiga as if he were a piece of fragile glass before heading inside, making sure not to undo the gag, "Come young Raiga, we have much to do my boy…

And for what it's worth, I'm sorry and thank you."

* * *

Tsunade had finished with her work in Konoha quicker than she thought; only 5 days. Her Sensei would be taking the mantle of Hokage back until he could find a successor. He offered the position to both herself and Jiraiya, but both of them had turned it down. Tsunade since she'd be returning to the village in 2 years, though she made sure not to mention that, and Jiraiya because he needed to keep the village enemies at bay now that they were down their ultimate war deterrent, namely Minato Namikaze.

She herself picked up a tag along, a Genin named Shizune, her deceased lover's niece. She'd take care of the girl, if only for Dan's memory.

They made their way to Gana no Gai quickly, and after asking around Tsunade found herself annoyed that Toka decided to get a hotel suite while she was away. Upon entering the hotel and asking the clerk where Toka's room was, the civilian girls eyes opened wide before calling her manager over.

The manager came over with a solemn look in his eye, "Excuse me miss, you are the companion of a miss Toka Uzumaki, yes?"

Tsunade narrowed her eyes, did the fool do something illegal or try to seduce an important married man? "Yes, I'm her companion. Where is she?"

He lowered his head, "I'm sorry to say she is dead. We found her corpse on the stairwell nearly a week ago."

The air around them grew cold as Tsunades eyes narrowed at the man, "I do not like these types of games boy, tell me where she is, NOW!"

His head lowered even further, "I am truly sorry for your loss."

Her narrowed eyes began to tear up, "What about her son? Raiga, he was only 3 and my Godson."

"He may be alive; nothing but her corpse was there. Whoever did it likely took the boy, for whatever reason."

Tsunade found herself on her knees, her legs had given out as tears streamed down her face, "Her body… Where is it?"

"We made a quick casket and put it in the freezer room where we keep our foodstuffs. If nobody showed up after a week we intended to cremate her. I can show you, if you like?"

She sniffled more, wiping her eyes with her wrist before nodding, she turned to Shizune who looked extremely confused, "Wait in the lobby Shizune." She nodded and ran off.

The manager offered his arm which she used to stand up before leading her to the kitchens and into the freezer room. Inside lay boxes of foodstuffs along the walls and in the middle was a thick wooden casket. Tsunade steeled herself before lifting the top of the casket, revealing the body of her pseudo-sister, her face looked the picture of shock, her neck slit all the way through and though her clothes were bloody the only thing that looked remotely clean was that cursed necklace.

She moved towards the corpse, planting a kiss on Toka cold forehead before removing the necklace from her. She looked the necklace over before mumbling, "you never fail to take them all from me, do you?" The necklace was placed on Tsunade's neck, resting the crystal on her bust.

She turned toward the manager with a strained smile, "I'll take the body, she needs to buried proper."

He nodded, offered his condolences once more before heading out.

* * *

Tsunade and Shizune brought the casket to the border of Taki no Kuni and Hi no Kuni, overlooking the outskirts of the Valley of the End.

Tsunade had created a grave for her friend and offered prayers to all the deities she could think of for her safe passage.

 _Toka Uzumaki_

 _014-044 Shinobi Village Era_

 _A good friend, a fair mother, and the sister I wish I had_

 _You will be missed_

She placed a bouquet on the grave before turning around, "Shizune, it's time to go."

"Hai Tsunade-sama!"

She would find her Godson if it was the last thing she did.

* * *

It had been a week since Raiga was brought to Takigakure, and during that week much had occurred. The Elder that had gained custody of him showed Raiga to the Council of Taki and in a rare display of union, it was decided he was to become the villages weapon. Once the decision was made the village spent 2 days preparing for the ceremony.

The ceremony itself had taken 4 days to happen, the beginning phase involved the sedation of the current weapon, an older man by the name of Raki. Then they had to ensure that all the equipment was proper and their Fuinjutsu masters were well rested.

After all the preparations were made, Raiga was placed on an octoganal pedestal in the middle of a circular room lit by torches, facing directly infront of Raki.

3 days of screams from Raiga and Raki had occurred and the end result was both the death of Raki…

And Raiga becoming Takigakure's Sandaime Jinchuriki of the Nanabi.

* * *

 **This is the Prologue to a new story that randomly appeared in my head. Just so anybody that is curious asks, this is indeed an OC Self Instert, this first chapter just laid the plot out before I went into character development like I will in later chapters. I always liked the idea of creating a character in the Narutoverse that was important, but wasn't in your face like being the twin of a Rookie 9 or taking one of their places.**

 **In this case, aside from Kurama and Son Goku, Chomei is my favorite Bijuu, yet Fu is my least favorite Jinchuriki, so I rectified that by replacing Fu. She still exists if you paid attention, just she didn't get the short straw and need to become a Jinchuriki.**

 **I am basing Raiga Uzumaki's future self on the anime character Yukihara Souma, or however you spell it. He looks super Uzumaki in my opinion, and his anime model is very pleasing.**

 **Also, on Toka's grave I added the term Shinobi Village Era. I am using a timeline I found on Narutopedia where this era started at the end of the 1st Shinobi War. Note that this has absolutely nothing to do with when Konoha itself was founded, just when the first war ended. It works surprisingly well and keeps things organized.**

 **If you like it, follow/favorite this story and give me lots of reviews!**


	2. Lucky

When the sealing of the Nanabi into Raiga had been complete it seemed as though Takigakure was in good hands.

Raiga himself however had been assaulted by memories and experiences from a world and perspective completely unlike his own.

Memories of a man named Robert, a man that people just called Robber due to his public status as a thief, snitch and murderer.

Robert was a plain man who had grown up on the streets of a modern city along with his father. In order to eat properly he learned to steal and became good at it. In order to escape the law when he was caught he learned to snitch on fellow street walkers for higher crimes in exchange for lesser sentences.

How he was forced to become a murderer when his father came at him with a knife.

Memories and experiences continued to play in Raiga's mind, including a strange rendition of the Elemental Nations in the form of a picture book called "Naruto."

It had taken the week he was in comatose from the sealing of the Nanabi to sort out these memories.

Raiga was a smart, genius of a child whilst Robert was a street smart punk who knew that nothing was black and white since he was able to talk.

They were now one.

* * *

When Raiga had awoken, he found himself staring at a blank white ceiling whilst he was strapped to a bed. His memories of Robert were coming into the fray and he was still having difficulty assimilating the differences between his strange alter-ego of sorts; but he understood Robert was never a fan of hospitals.

White rooms always meant hospitals.

"Hello?"

He found himself speaking more clearly than he had before the memories had come; likely due to the fact that Robert was an adult while Raiga was a child.

A nurse came in with a cup of water and a calm expression on her face, "Hello Raiga-chan." She offered him a small smile before bringing the cup to his mouth before he could protest or even ask for some drink.

The water helped clear his throat, "Where… What happened?"

"You speak well for your age Raiga-chan." She kept that smile on her face whilst talking.

He stared at her, amber piercing into her coal eyes, "What. Happened?"

She sighed, "Your mother…"

He remembered now. Oh yes, his mother was murdered on the order of Taki Shinobi, a man named Suien called for it. This nurse must have been in on it.

"What about her?"

"One of our Jonin scouts found her bleeding out. She offered you to our village for a clean death; I'm sorry for your loss."

What kind of fool did she take him for? His mother was killed right in front of him…

That was right; to them he was just a 3 year old; easily molded for their purposes.

If Robert new one thing it was that people were psychological to a fault, and Raiga refused to be played like a puppet for these Shinobi's entertainment. He'd find out what they wanted then leave.

"What if I don't want to join your village?"

"I'm afraid that your mother made the choice for you, you've already been treated kindly by Taki, why wouldn't you want to join our humble home?"

Humble? Raiga looked out the window to see the roots of a giant tree giving shade to a huge circular village with water aplenty streaming from waterfalls all around.

Humble indeed…

Raiga racked his head around Roberts understanding of the Naruto picture books that were apparently called "Manga". Chakra, Raiga knew of it prior to Robert but with Roberts memories he had an understanding of what it was and that Shinobi Villages like Takigakure and Konohagakure taught the usage of Chakra for combat and other scenarios.

These people wanted him? They'd get him until he had no use for such liars.

"Only…"

"Only what, Raiga-chan?"

"Only if I can be tau-taught about Cakra." He felt Roberts survival instincts, and a 3 year old speaking too fluently didn't bode well for him.

The nurse smiled warmly at him, "Chakra Raiga, Chakra. And I'm sure we can find you a tutor, does that mean you'd like to be a Shinobi of our village?"

He could almost see the eager look in her eyes, like her paycheck revolved around his answer. Now that he thought about It, it was very likely it _did_ indeed revolve around that.

Raiga shook his head, "Not yet, I just wanna sleep."

She smiled, though it seemed strained, "Of course Raiga-chan, just call when you're awake." She left the room after that.

Raiga understood that something was different, that was obvious by the new memories and sudden personality shifts and the fact he even _understood_ what a personality shift was.

* * *

He closed his eyes and focused, memories were continuously coming up and showing themselves, like they were fish fighting for bait only in this case they were memories fighting for which was remembered first. As he continued to sort through the memories he found himself walking through a grass-lain path that seemed to lead to a pit.

As he walked towards the pit he noted that in the center was a giant bug of sorts shackled by its horn and stinger to the interior while its wings had spikes sticking through their exoskeletons which were connected to chains that were spread throughout the circular pit making it look crucified without a cross.

Raiga noted the monster bug continuously thrashed around even when it was obvious he was stuck, "Uh, you alright?" The question sounded and was stupid, but the sound of his tiny voice make the bug halt in its movements before its head moved so it could see Raiga staring at it from above the pit.

" _ **So… My jailer comes so soon after I was sealed? How… Unlucky."**_

The voice was extremely choppy, both from the chain around its neck and the natural tone of its voice. It sounded distinctly male but so sorrowful that Raiga actually felt horrible for reasons he couldn't quite place.

Memories from Robert surfaced once more and he noted from the Naruto Manga that this was a Bijuu, the Nanabi to be exact. All the Bijuu had names, they were…

"Um… Shukaku, Ma-Matatabi… Isobu? Son Goku, that's the easy one, um…"

The Nanabi's interest was immediately piqued as the child named his brothers and sisters coveted names.

"Kokuo! So easy to forget that one, then there's the slug… Saiko- Saiken! And uh… Oh!

You're Chomei!"

" _ **How do you know my name Ningen?"**_

"I dunno, after you were sealed in me I kept getting these weird memories. One was of a book that had all your names." It was best not to lie to the monstrous beast of pure Chakra taken form. That wasn't likely to be considered a smart idea. Still, it seemed like a smarter idea not to mention that he knew the names from a cartoonish story and instead say it was from a book. Bijuu probably had a ton of pride and whatnot.

Chomei mulled the thought of a child knowing his name before nodding slightly, _**"…Lucky… A lucky jailor? Kehkehkeh! Yes! I am Chomei! The Lucky Numba' Seven! And you! Who are you child?!"**_ His tone went from annoyance to curiosity to excitement in the blink of an eye.

Truly Chomei didn't have a large attention span.

"Raiga Uzumaki Chomei-sama. I was born July 7th and-"

" _ **Lucky numba's! Born on the seventh month on its seventh day and the Jinchuriki of my Seven tails!"**_

Raiga couldn't entirely understand why he was so excited; Chomei _did_ get sealed into a 3 year old not a week ago. Still, at least he wasn't like the Kyuubi from Naruto and damnit these memories were confusing! But yes, Chomei was nothing like the Kyuubi- or Kurama he supposed.

"Right… Anyways, I am deeply sorry you were forced into this Chomei-sama."

Chomei seemed to buzz happily, _**"Such a polite jailor too! Would you undo those shackles pretty please?"**_

Chomei was indeed not like Kurama, but in any case this was a Bijuu; he would kill Raiga the second he could if it meant freedom.

"I'm sorry Chomei-sama, if I did that you'd kill me. I cannot release you, at least not at this moment."

Chomei continued to buzz, though it wasn't as happy it still was upbeat, _**"A smart jailor is a lucky jailor, kehkehkeh!"**_ He stopped short; the buzzing grew loud in random ways that seemed confused _**"You said you learned my name from a memory of a book ningen?"**_

Raiga nodded dumbly as the massive Bijuu continued to buzz, _**"Tell me of this book."**_

This was not a request but a demand.

Raiga swallowed his fear that was returning as the Nanabi grew more serious in comparison to his playful mood, "It was a… story, I suppose. The main character was Kurama-sama's Jinchuriki; a boy named Naruto. The details don't matter much, but the reason I know your name is because there's an… an organization called Akatsuki that attacked and subdued the various Bijuu's Jinchuriki and sealed them inside something called a 'Gedo Mazo'"

Chomei immediately roared in ungodly rage at the mention of the Mazo, _**"NINGEN! DO NOT TOY WITH ME! STORY OR NO, NONE SHOULD KNOW OF THE GEDO MAZO!"**_

"But it's true! The leader of the group even had a Rinnegan!"

Chomei's rage turned to confusion and then the buzzing turned into a frightful sound as if a thousand insects were being slaughter at this moment, _**"Rinnegan… Tou-san…? Continue the story Ningen."**_

Raiga gulped but shakily continued, "It turned out that Pein, the Rinnegan weilder wasn't the actual leader but a puppet; since he was the only one that could summon the Gedo Mazo with his eyes. The real leader was a guy named Tobi who posed as a grunt. When the first 7 Bijuu were sealed and the eighth, Gyuki and his Jinchuriki had escaped, Tobi called for war."

Raiga licked his lips as Chomei listened raptly, "It turns out, that Tobi held a Sharingan that could control Bijuu, and when Kurama was sealed into Naruto, it was because Tobi forced him into attacking Konoha. His end goal was to seal all the Bijuu into the Mazo to become the Juubi Jinchuriki."

Chomei continued to buzz and loudly at that, but did not interrupt Raiga, "The Juubi was incomplete though. He only got a part of both Gyuki's and Kurama's Chakra, so while Tobi was trying to set things up to balance out, Naruto was being trinaed by B, Gyuki's Jinchuriki on how to control a Bijuu."

" _ **Falsities! Unlickiness! We cannot be controlled! Merely sealed!"**_

Raiga waited with baited breath as Chomei continued to rant until it was his turn to speak, "B didn't control Gyuki, but they were partners. At first Naruto had to beat Kurama in a fight and steal his Chakra. Then Kurama, during the war opted to help Naruto instead of risking being controlled by the Gedo Mazo. It wasn't about control, it was a… A harmony I suppose."

Chomei calmed at that, buzzing in a manner that couldn't be understood, but it was apparent there were no threats in it, so Raiga continued, "Anyways. Naruto and B were able to fend the remaining Bijuu that were being controlled by that Sharingan off until Tobi, along with a man named Madara Uchiha came and resurrected to Juubi. In the end, Tobi, who then revealed himself to be named Obito, was able to seal Gyuki and Kurama and he became the Jinchuriki of the Juubi."

Chomei had growled and the buzzing was definitely threatening, but Raiga continued through, "However, Madara was Obito's Shisho. He healed Obito from near death and from that, implanted a… Virus of sorts, I suppose. When Obito became a Jinchuriki, the Virus took over and Madara gained the Juubi's power. He already had the Rinnegan somehow, so he was able to control the power much more-so than Obito."

Raiga took a breath while Chomei thrashed in annoyance, "The reason Madara wanted to become the Juubi Jinchuriki was to cast a Genjutsu on the Moon to reflect and hit every living thing in the Elemental Nations and give them what he believed to be true peace. However, the Virus that took over Obito took over Madara as well. It became apparent to Madara that what he believed to be his power was in fact something else entirely, and from the now humanoid form of the Juubi's Chakra had gained intelligence and took the form of a woman named Kaguya Ootsutsuki."

Chomei's roar of rage was enormous. He thrashed with his fury and the buzzing was so loud that even in his mindscape Raiga's ears bled, _**"KAGUYA! NO! THIS STORY IS BAD! UNLUCKYYYYYYYYY!"**_

Chomei continued to rage for many more minutes until finally he stilled giving Raiga the opportunity to continue, "It turns out, that when Kurama was sealed, only his Yang was sealed within Naruto while his Yin was sealed into Minato Namikaze, the one who sealed Kurama in the first place. When the Gedo Mazo absorbed Kurama from Naruto, through a miracle Naruto was able to gain Kurama's Yin. It was during this moment that a man named Hagoromo came to him in a vision."

" _ **Tou-san?"**_

"Hagoromo claimed Naruto to be the reincarnation of his youngest son, Asura. To balance out his spiritual levels now that he had so much Yin Chakra when Naruto's body was built to support Kurama's Yang, Hagoromo gave his own Yang to Naruto. At the same time a boy named Sasuke, Indra's reincarnation, was granted Hagoromo's Yin."

The buzzing returned to calm levels as Raiga continued, "Sasuke and Naruto worked together to seal Kaguya with the power Hagoromo gave them, and in doing this they released the Bijuu that were sealed."

Chomei buzzed around, his rage was still apparent at the mention of the Gedo Mazo and Kaguya, but hearing of his father always calmed him. Among the Bijuu, he was the child with the weakest relationship to their father, more due to the fact that Chomei was a larva during the time of his death and didn't have the mindset to hold proper relationships. It was only later on when he grew into his mature form that he gained his personality, _**"A... A very Unlucky tale, Ningen. Why does it matter so?"**_

"As of about 2 weeks ago on October the 10th Kurama attacked Konohagakure and was sealed into an infant…

The infants name was Naruto."

Chomei stilled, the buzzing completely disappeared and with it any ability Raiga had to understand Chomeis mood.

* * *

Hours had passed and Raiga used the time to sit in his mindscape and sort through the foreign memories of Robert. He had finally been able to work through them while Chomei was silent and still; staring his large head at nothing.

" _ **Ningen…"**_

Raiga perked up. He stood up and walked toward the edge of the pit where he could see Chomeis chained body, "Yes, Chomei-sama?"

" _ **That story… Unlucky as it was, was true; wasn't it?"**_

"It hasn't happened yet, if that's what you mean; and I intend to stay as far away from the Akatuski as possible."

Chomei gave a guttural and theatrical sigh in response, _**"I do not care if it ended well, I refuse to submit myself to the Gedo Mazo."**_

Raiga took a confused look, of course he understood the desire not to be sealed away but it wasn't like he intended to play the hero, "So…"

" _ **So. I will give you a chance, Ningen. Prove to me that you are worthy of my Luckyness and we will ensure that this Akatsuki never comes near me with the Mazo!"**_

Raiga blinked before shifting around, "Um… I don't really plan to be the hero. I was planning to go hide-"

Chomei stared at me, _**"No. You are my Jinchuriki. I refuse to let you be a coward."**_

"But…"

" _ **Did I ever tell you to charge in and attack Akatsuki? No, you will gain the power to defend yourself and my Lucky self in turn. That is your duty as my Jailor, to keep me in my cell; as Unlucky as that sounds."**_

"Well yeah, sure…"

" _ **Just… Just do it, Ningen. If you do, I offer you the very skies themselves."**_

Raiga just nodded dumbly. He told Chomei the Naruto story from what Robert remembered, not perfect facts but close enough. Apparently it was a huge deal to Chomei since it was his understanding that the Bijuu were loath to part with any of their power.

Perhaps the Bijuu was onto something about all that Luck-speak.

"Alright, I'll make sure to get strong enough to defend myself from them."

" _ **Our pact is set then. Now leave me Ningen, I do not feel so Lucky and wish to sleep."**_

* * *

Raiga awoke only a few moments afterword.

He calmly got out of bed, noticing the straps must have been released by the nurse from earlier now that he was in stable condition from the sealing.

Still, he mused, now that he understood his place as Chomei's Jinchuriki and subsequently Takigakure's new "weapon" he wondered what to do.

Raiga obviously held no loyalty to Taki, their Shinobi slit his mother throat and forced him to act as Chomei's jail. They were also his ticket to performing Chomei's task of gaining enough power to protect himself and subsequently Chomei from the grasp of Akatsuki.

And what did he mean about "offering him the very skies themselves?" True, Chomei was the only Bijuu capable of flight, but it wasn't like he could give a Summoning Contract or something.

It was only when Raiga headed into the hospital restroom to wash his face that he understood. When he got on the step-stool that allowed him to see his mug in the mirror he saw something bizarre and beautiful all in one.

A pair of translucent wings that looked exactly like the wings Chomei possessed were wrapped around his torso, like a vest of some sort. He imagined what they would look like open and with his imagination so too did the wings respond, making him look like some type of insect-hybrid.

He grinned ferally and headed back to his hospital cot, testing the motion of his wings and the will needed to use them before he found himself hovering lightly with little strain.

Raiga headed to the window in the room, and opened it. He was quite surprised that they would allow the window to be open to a newly formed Jinchuriki's room but took it in stride.

He found himself jumping out the window like a dive and willed his newly dubbed Chakra Wings to take flight.

Flying, Raiga decided, was amazing. Chomei's words rang true, he really did offer Raiga the skies themselves, for though they sky was far too vast for even a Bijuu, the ability to utilize these wings was well worth nearly any price.

Raiga found a perch on one of the branches of the Great Tree and looked down on Takigakure. He could see the vastness and had to remind himself that though Taki was indeed huge, they were considered a minor village. True, they were also considered the greatest of the minor villages, but without a proper leader to control and move that title they would never rise.

Raiga had no desire for such a title.

It was now that he decided; Raiga would use Taki and train himself until just before he was forced to become a Shinobi where he would escape on his Chakra Wings; Taki wouldn't ever announce to the world they lost a Jinchuriki, not unless they wanted to be laughed at by the whole of the Great 5.

The opportunity was endless and to quote Chomei…

Lucky.

* * *

 **I hope you all liked the first official chapter of "Plot Theif." I'm going to take a moment to detail some things that weren't expanded upon but were mentioned slightly. In context to the memory of Robert, I am only allowing Raiga to remember details of his like that are relevant, such as his skills as a theif or how to pin the blame on different people that Robert had turned into an artform as well as Roberts _vague_ memory of the Naruto Manga. He never watched the Anime, just read the manga; so Taki isn't expanded upon nearly as much as it could be. The same goes for filler episodes that were Anime only, Raiga has no idea about them. **

**Robert is just not the primary personality much like Raiga is no longer just Raiga. The idea I had was a combination with partial memories so that we get an interesting amalgamation that turns into what Raiga is now. This also ties into why he seems so much more mature than any 3 year old should be; he has the memories and mannerisms of a fully grown adult.**

 **Notice how when you read the summary and read characters it said "OC, Nanabi/Chomei and Tsunade?" Tsunade will get her due, but at this point in time it's all about Raiga. I intend to speed things along so Tsunade comes into play sooner rather than later but for now please be patient.**

 **Follow/Favorite if you want to see more and remember to Review!**


	3. Escape

**I'm just taking a quick moment to inform my readers that this will likely be a weekly Fanfic. My schedule doesn't allow me to write as much as i'd like.**

* * *

It was lucky that Takigakure had never once been invaded in its 60 years of existence; else they would have been more alert at night. So Raiga took that night time opportunity to return to his hospital cot after determining that he could, indeed, retract his Chakra Wings at will.

He determined it was best to keep his more cordial relationship with Chomei a secret until he could reunite himself with Tsunade. When his memories of Robert finally settled and the amalgamation that was now Raiga's personality set the information that he had a Godmother intrigued him. Robert claimed Orochimaru to be his favorite character due to his cynical viewpoint and his actuality as a scary villain in contrast to many of the other enemies in the series. Raiga however, after sorting through memories of the Manga and his own past, easily claimed Tsunade as his favorite character.

It was a strange day when he called his Godmother a character, he idly noted.

In any case, the night had passed and when morning came Raiga found himself being awoken by the nurse and taken out of his cot for food. He request Ramen, since Raiga had never had any and wanted to understand why Naruto was obsessed with the stuff.

When the bowl of Miso Ramen was brought to him as he made himself comfortable in the hospital cafeteria, he noted that a man came and sat across from him. Raiga offered a weak salute to the man and dug into his Ramen, much to the stranger's apparent amusement if the stifled snort was anything to go by.

"So, you're Raiga huh?"

Raiga looked up at the stranger and took in his appearance. He had a hard tan, akin to what one would hold if they'd worked in a field for their income. His face was lined with small wrinkles and he had small grey eyes along with brown hair that was greying at the tips with a small goatee, "Uhuh." He then plunged right back into the Ramen. For some strange reason the food tasted akin to what he mused nectar and ambrosia to be like, he just couldn't get enough of the height stunting noodles of goodness.

"It's nice to meet you Raiga, I'm Shiburo, the leader of Takigakure."

Raiga absently choked on his Ramen but immediately gave "Shiburo" his full attention. How was he to know that they'd bring in the Village head?! "Uh… Nice to meet you, Shiburo-sama."

He smiled kindly, "You're very well spoken for your age, did you know that?"

Raiga nodded, "Kaa-chan did the Shinobi tests on me, she said I was a genu-genius." He nodded; taking another bite out of his noodles not notices the look of surprise that came across Shiburo's face.

"I didn't know your mother was a Shinobi."

"She wasn't, she knew Fuinjutsu, since it was a clan tra-tradition, so she knew some things."

He nodded, it was true Raiga was an Uzumaki, and if the story the Honored Elder that had gathered him gave, his mother was dying from unknown reasons. It was a sad fate, especially for one so young and so well spoken to see his mother die and be chosen as the Nanabi's vessel. But, in the Shinobi world sacrifices must be made for the good of the village.

"Well, I'm just letting you know that you'll be living with me and my son Shibuki from now on."

Raiga looked at Shiburo with wide eyes, "Why?"

"It's my duty as the leader of this village to ensure that they can be protected. You, Raiga, are a very important person to our home whether you know it or not, and due to that it falls to me to make sure you are as comfortable as possible so you can be guided properly."

Raiga understood the gist of what was being said; Shiburo's job was to watch him. And from paying attention to the wording there, they did not know Raiga was perfectly aware of his Jinchuriki status.

That was a blessing in disguise.

* * *

Time had passed in Taki and Raiga had slowly accustomed to the village atmosphere.

Unlike in Konoha, nobody held any animosity to his status as Jinchuriki, but that could be attributed to the fact that it was an _actual_ secret.

Raiga was able to convince Shiburo not to add him to the Shinobi corps while sill granting him some training due to his age. During this time Raiga learned how to access his Chakra, which in turn allowed him to use his Chakra Wings once again much to his joy.

Speaking of Chakra Wings, Raiga kept in frequent contact with Chomei. Chomei himself was just happy, or Lucky if one were to use his terminology, that Raiga was an actually willing to hold conversations with him. Apparently the first time he was sealed it was into an older Kunoichi that never even considered him to be sentient and due to her age, she was incapable of using his Chakra since it didn't add into her network from a young age. His second Jinchuriki, Raki, only saw Chomei as a tool or akin to one at the very least. Chomei often recounted Raiga with tails of his previous host's brazen acts of foolishness around him.

Raiga began his training once his Chakra was completely active, which took 2 months after he became Chomei's Jinchuriki. In order to activate his Chakra, he had to meditate frequently to keep Chomei's Chakra and his own separate until he could instinctively differentiate them. It was a consequence of starting his training so soon after the sealing. The training originally consisted of Shurikenjutsu and smaller Chakra control exercises such as the Leaf Sticking exercises.

Originally meant in the beginning, for true to Raiga's status of genius he finished the Chakra control exercises quickly enough and moved on to Tree Walking on his own time, eventually making his way towards Water Walking. It was still strange to him to remember how these exercises were performed from memories of a Manga. When Shiburo caught him performing Water Walking at the age of 4 he knew Raiga could become the greatest asset to Takigakure and lead them to greatness.

Shiburo, after witnessing Raiga's prowess in the Shinobi arts decided to give him extra incentive to remain loyal to Taki and Taki alone, offered Raiga a piece of Chakra Paper.

"Raiga, do you know what this is?"

Raiga was currently practicing jumping on top of water. It was a legitimate exercise that taught the body instant reaction and precision control. He looked over at Shiburo holding a sheet of paper, "Paper" Raiga grunted, continuing his training. He needed to get better sooner than later.

Shiburo offered a small chuckle to the 4 year old; Raiga had grown on him. He was a blunt and easily motivated boy with an obsession with Ramen for some strange reason and he was something of a little brother to Shibuki, which helped.

"No, this is Chakra Paper; can you tell me what that is from your Shinobi history course?"

Raiga's attention was immediately caught as he walked over to Shiburo, "Chakra Paper is paper that is harvested from the trees the Shodaime Hokage Hashirama Senju created using his Mokuton. The Paper has the ability to inform a person that adds their Chakra to it what their Chakra nature is."

"And what are Chakra natures?"

"Chakra natures are relevant to a Shinobi's natural talent in a specific type of Ninjutsu. Fire, Lightning, Water, Earth and Wind are the natures a Shinobi is able to utilize."

"And how do you tell what your nature is from using this paper?"

"If you have a Fire nature the paper with turn to ash, Water soaks the paper, Earth turns it to dust, Lightning crumples it, and Wind splits it in half."

"Are there any exceptions?" Shiburo loved these moments. Shibuki sadly didn't have much of an interest in the Shinobi arts regardless of being an Academy student, but Raiga was like a drone.

"The exceptions are Kekkai Genkai's, blood-limits. There exist bloodlines that have the natural ability to combine 2 or more elements into a new one, such as Yoton or the Mokuton which the Chakra paper originates from."

"Very good! Today we'll be learning what your nature is and discussing its properties, as well as determining if we can have a tutor for you depending on your nature."

Raiga nodded eagerly and Shiburo handed the paper over. Raiga placed it on the palm of his dominant hand, which was his right hand and poured Chakra into it.

The paper crumpled.

"Alright, so you've got a Lightning affinity, those are very useful. Now, what do you know about Raiton?"

Raiga knew a fair amount, and at the same time not much at all. He knew that he was likely to have a Lightning affinity based on who his sperm donor that allowed him to be born was, "Raiton Jutsu turns your Chakra into Lightning which can be used to pierce and paralyze enemies."

"Not bad, it's a very good description for your age, but let me give you a better one, alright?"

Raiga nodded eagerly, sitting down as Shiburo went into full lecture mode, "As you know, Raiton is one of the 5 basic elemental nature transformations, which allows you to generate lightning by increasing the high frequency vibrations of your Chakra. You having a Raiton nature means your Chakra naturally vibrates in comparison to my Suiton nature which means my Chakra naturally flows."

Raiga blinked, not knowing that at all.

"By increasing the frequency vibrations of your Chakra, you can increase your speed more-so than say a Suiton user could; but that doesn't mean you will be faster, it just means you have the capability to be. Raiton has many abilities, some like you said are meant for piercing, like Kakashi Hatake's Chidori, or to paralyze opponents like Kumogakure's Kaminari Shibari, a paralyzing seal that is empowered by Raiton Chakra."

Shiburo didn't know when Raiga pulled out a notepad and wrote that down; he didn't even know he had a notepad. Still, whatever helped the lad helped the lad, "Now, while this is uncommon in most places aside from Kumogakure, Raiton Chakra can be focused into bladed weapons using a technique called Chakra Flow that can also be applied with Futon techniques. These blades are augmented with the high frequency of Raiton and makes cutting techniques more effective on harder surfaces; armor for example. They are akin to a saw being moved very fast where a Futon Chakra Flow technique would increase sharpness and depending on how much Chakra was put into the flow, the length of the weapon."

Shiburo took a breath before continuing, "Now Raiton sounds great, and it is. In fact Raiton users are praised here in Taki since the majority of our Shinobi use Suiton, and water conducts electricity making combinations very effective; you are currently the only Raiton user in the village. However, while I wouldn't call these downsides, there are things you need to know about Raiton that if you didn't could kill you in the future."

Shiburo held Raiga's attention explicitly at this moment, and he savored it, "Raiton is weak to Futon, Wind, due to its nature as a natural electrical insulator. A Raiton user can beat that issue if their Chakra's vibration frequency is faster than the Futon technique can insulate. The difference however, is that in the case of Futon insulation, all that is required is for the technique to have more Chakra poured into it. Raiton needs control, and with it higher Chakra levels, which you do have.

Now, do you have any questions before I continue?"

"Raiton is strong against Doton, right? Why?"

"Fair question, fair question; Raiton naturally has the ability to pierce, whereas Doton focuses on wide areas and defense. Just as lightning is capable of traveling through the ground and breaking it apart, so too is Raiton able to pierce Doton."

Raiga nodded, writing the information down on his notepad before looking at Shiburo expectantly.

"Now, the reason I decided to let you test your affinity is my belief that based on your progress with Water Walking, you're ready for the next control exercise."

Shiburo then pulled out a scroll, a storage scroll in particular and poured Chakra into the seal matrix. From the scroll came a bag of leaves, a roll of thick parchment, and a box filled with lightbulbs, "When training up Wind, Fire and Earth, you use leaves. For Wind, the goal is to cut it in half with just your Chakra. For Fire, the goal is to burn the leaf without burning your hand. For Earth, the goal was to turn the leaf into dust, but keep the dust in your palm."

He then pointed towards the parchment, "Most places would use paper, but since Taki has a majority of Suiton users and since one our exports is parchment from the Great Tree, this is used instead. True it's harder, but it's worth it in the end. For Water, the goal is to soak the parchment so much that it falls apart."

He then picked up the box of light bulbs and handed one to Raiga, "Raiton has the most unique training due to the fact that it was only recently that light bulbs were invented; around 50 years ago, in comparison to hundreds of years of documented nature manipulation training for the other elements. For Lightning, the goal is to light the bulb and keep it lit for as long as you can. Too little and nothing will happen, and too much and the bulb will burn and so too will your hand. The original exercise was to crinkle a leaf with just your Chakra, but that was replaced with the light bulb exercise since the leaf only taught how to vibrate your Chakra and had no insight to frequency."

Raiga looked at the light bulb with both wonder and annoyance, "After the light bulb test what is the next level of Raiton training?"

Shiburo chuckled with mirth, "Well, you're nowhere near ready for that. It takes most _adults_ months of straight training just to get this first part down, but I'll humor you. The second stage of Raiton training is the Chakra Flow technique I told you about, but instead of using a blade you'd use a blunted piece of metal like a pipe. The theory is that if you can cut something with a blunt weapon then when we put a sharp weapon in your hand… Well, you understand."

Raiga nodded and looked to the bulb in his hands seriously before adding Chakra to it. The bulb immediately burned out and his hand singed lightly, "Ow!"

Shiburo cackled in mirth, "Aye, that happens. I'll make sure to get you plenty of spare bulbs for you to practice on your own time, alright?"

He noted Raiga wasn't even listening; the boy just went to the box and grabbed another bulb before getting to work.

Shiburo decided to leave the boy alone for now; he'd eventually tire himself out and come inside for supper.

* * *

Another year had passed and with Raiga had finally finished up the light bulb exercise. He was able to keep the bulb alight and hold it for 30 minutes, which apparently was thrice as long as most people bothered with, much to his dismay.

He had also begun to delve into his heritage through the art of Fuinjutsu. Taki was the only minor village that had any major experience with Fuinjutsu due to their need for Jinchuriki like Raiga, so they had a fair amount of resources for him to work with.

Shiburo had told Raiga that he would soon be joining the Takigakure Shinobi corps, regardless of age. At first it was agreed that a 3-4 year old child was too young, but with people like Kakashi Hatake, who became a Genin at 5 and were still alive and kicking, it was understood that Raiga couldn't escape his duty for much longer. Shiburo told him that he had until he was the age of 6, then it was off to the Genin corps.

Shibuki however, was finally taking his training somewhat seriously and was learning the Leaf Sticking exercise whilst Raiga worked on his calligraphy. Shiburo was quite happy to help his son with training, whilst Raiga _still_ worked on his calligraphy. He had belatedly realized that, unlike other Shinobi arts that he just understood, Fuinjutsu would take much more work.

When he turned 5 he was granted the privilege to learn his first Jutsu. Shiburo even gave a sign of great trust and lead Raiga to the Jutsu vault, located under one of the main roots of the Great Tree. Upon entering the archives he noted that it wasn't nearly as large as he'd thought it'd be, but it was very possible that the majority of the scrolls were sealed in more storage scrolls.

When he went over the Raiton section, Raiga noted a Jutsu that caught his eye immediately, but he was well aware that it was far beyond his skill level. Still, it was a technique he would learn, nothing would stop him.

Raiga chose the technique Raiton: Jibashi, or Electromagnetic Murder. The Jutsu was very simple in execution but the beauty of it was that it was one of the few Raiton techniques that relied more on the amount of Chakra poured into it instead of the control needed to increase the frequency. Raiga was the Chomei's Jinchuriki, meaning he, at the age of 5, already had High Chunin to Low Jonin level reserves.

Raiga enjoyed overpowering his Jibashi very much.

Still, after weeks of single-minded training in order to successfully perform Raiton: Jibashi, Raiga was told it was time to begin learning a weapon.

Raiga knew who his father was; he remembered his Kaa-chan and Godmother, who he had called Baa-chan, speaking about the man. Raiga Kurosuki, hailed as the Mizu no Raijin. Current wielder of the Kiba blades, a pair of Twin-blades that had been granted the title of the sharpest swords ever forged. Many tales were told of the Kiba, also known as the Raito - Thunderswords, and how they were able to decimate full teams with the proper wielder.

Raiga Uzumaki had every intention of taking the Kiba from Raiga Kurosuki's corpse. So when Shiburo asked what type of weapon he'd like to learn…

"Twin-blades."

Shiburo tried to talk him out of it, or at least talk him down to only using one sword due to the strain of learning two swords at once would be difficult on his younger body. That, and Taki didn't have any proper Twin-blade Kenjutsu styles, so he'd have to create his own.

Raiga preferred that anyways.

Still, they didn't let him learn with actual swords, he was to be their weapon and they could risk him killing himself through self-harm. No, they brought out a pair of metal pipes that had been filled in with iron. It was a pity that they wouldn't allow Raiga to learn to wield a proper blade, but at least they were willing to allow him to use Twin-blades.

But when they brought Suien, the very man that murdered his mother, to be his sparring partner?

Raiga charged at him with a partial Chakra Flow attached to his pipes, immediately catching the newly promoted Jonin off guard enough for Raiga to sweep his legs and slam a lightning infused pipe into Suien's groin.

The sickening crunch that was heard and the man's scream were very satisfying.

Shiburo immediately jumped into the fray with a pained expression on his face made Raiga know he went too far too soon, that was until Suien hobbled around on the ground still holding his now useless genitals and roared, "I'LL KILL YOU GAKI!"

Shiburo took that moment to take his attention away from Raiga and focus it on Suien, roaring for a medic.

Raiga made his escape before Shiburo could refocus his attention on the reason his Jonin was currently enraged.

* * *

More time had passed, the day was June 7, 047 SVE, and Raiga was currently on a rest day. He understood that training too much, especially with such a young body never boded well, so he was assigned 2 rest days a week. While on his rest day Raiga could be found lazing about in a hammock he set up in the branches of the Great Tree. He learned early on that he preferred hammocks over beds due to the natural snug feeling they give off. While on his hammock he was writing up a few storage scrolls for personal use. He understood that theory was extremely important when it came to the art of Fuinjutsu, but application was where he shined.

Still, he mused, it was likely something to do with his status as an Uzumaki.

He was perfectly aware that the Uzumaki didn't truly have a Kekkai Genkai, though their renowned longevity was praised in some circles as one. So, as a clan the Uzumaki delved into more foreign arts and on their own learned the value of Fuinjutsu on a large scale, turning what was merely an island nation with a bunch of redheads into Uzushiogakure, a military power that rivaled that of one of the 5 Great Shinobi Villages.

At least it _was_.

Raiga held very little empathy towards his clan, they were either dead or scattered to the corners of the worlds. He knew of 4 from his memories, Naruto in Konoha, Karin in Kusa, Nagato in Ame and now him in Taki.

4 people does not make a clan, it just makes a problem in his opinion.

As he finished his sixth scroll he idly put it in his empty kunai holster strapped to his right thigh that held the rest of them. As he prepared to begin writing up a seventh one a sound he'd never heard before in his near 3 years in Takigakure rang throughout the entire village.

An alarm siren.

As he looked down to see what was happening he noticed a panic occurring within the civilian population of Taki, which was strange. The civilians of the village as a whole were very dull folk, as were the Shinobi he idly noted. They wouldn't ever act like this unless it was serious.

As he pondered, an announcement came through the village via a loud-speaker system he was unaware even existed.

" _Takigakure is currently under siege on the western flank by Iwagakure Blast Corps. All civilians, Genin and ninja under the age of 14 report to the underground barracks immediately."_

This was it, it was finally time.

Raiga grabbed the storage scroll he had just put away and began sealing up all his Fuinjutsu equipment and hammock. The moment he finished with it, Raiga plunged into his mindscape, "Chomei!"

Chomei looked to be dozing until the sound of Raiga's high pitched voice stirred him, _**"Mmmm… Rai-gaki? What do you want? I was having such a Lucky dream… mmmm…"**_

"It's time Chomei, Takigakure is under attack, this is our best shot."

Chomei's attention was immediately held and he stretched lightly, due to his restraints making him incapable of doing much aside from sleep, _**"Then make haste Rai-gaki! Do not waste such a Lucky moment!"**_

Raiga looked down and prayed what he was about to ask for was granted, "I know I've never asked this of you before, but since this is the best opportunity for the both of us we need to work together.

I need to borrow some Chakra."

Chomei stilled, he had never given the Rai-gaki anything aside from his Chakra Wings, nor had Raiga ever asked him for anything else. All they did was have conversations about whatever interested them or Raiga would listen to Chomei tell stories. Still… If he needed Chakra _**"...You know you are too young to even ponder the thought of controlling my Chakra, yes?"**_

Raiga nodded, "It's not about control, and this is the best chance to finally leave. Not just for me, but for you. I don't have enough Chakra to escape on my own, Taki is too large and my reserves aren't large enough to power the Chakra Wings out of the border. Chomei, this is our chance!"

Chomei's body buzzed lightly before his large bi-horned head nodded lightly, _**"Very well Rai-gaki, if you lose control then you will die, and I will be free of my bonds; both Lucky and Unlucky."**_

Raiga convulsed lightly as Chomei's Chakra, seeped out of the pit and enveloped him soundly until he was flung out of his mindscape. When he came to, he noted that a mass of bubbles of Red Chakra began to poor out from the seal located on his back and envelope his body. His Chakra wings, which were normally a deep teal color were dyed a blood-red color, a single tail reminiscent of Chomei's stinger took shape from out of the mass of Red and as the Chakra Shroud stilled into a shape, he noted that the shoulders seemed enlarged as well as he now sported a di-pronged horn of pure Chakra on his scalp.

If Raiga were to look in the mirror he'd note that he looked like some sort of red insect.

He felt primal emotions welling up and he fought with every fiber of his will to keep them down as he jumped off the Great Tree and took flight. The Chakra Shroud followed him as if it was a second skin and his newly dyed wings were nearly thrice as fast to use as they were previously.

He dove down the Great Tree and glided over to the Jutsu archive he was shown on his fifth birthday. Using his newly enhanced body, he punched the sealed gate of the archive so hard that while his fist began to bleed, but the door did give out and when it fell Raiga immediately pulled out an empty storage scroll and began storing as many Jutsu he could into the scroll.

He started with the Fuinjutsu section, filling up 2 of his storage scrolls before finally deciding he had enough. Next was the Raiton section, which was minimal at best so only filled up 1 scroll. Raiga noted that the Jutsu that he had his eyes on since the moment he entered this room at the age of 5 was nice and ready, just for him!

He put the trio of full scrolls back into his holster and found a single safe with the word "KINJUTSU" embedded into it. He sealed the safe itself, no point in taking risks when he was under a deadline.

As he left the archive and found sunlight once more, he spread his crimson Chakra Wings and took flight.

He never looked back, nor did he see Shibuki staring at him with tears running down his face as his "brother" turn and fled the village.

On June 06, 047 SVE, Raiga Uzumaki fled Takigakure with infamy.

* * *

Raiga had been flying for over an hour and he finally made it to Taki no Kuni's singular port city to the far north known as Tsuna no Gai. Chomei's Chakra had nearly run out, and the only reason he was capable of using so much for such a long time was due to his relationship with Chomei and the adrenaline rush of what just transpired.

Raiga had glided down using the last sliver of Chomei's Chakra into an open crate lain on the hull of a docked ship filled with fruit. Upon landing Raiga immediately felt his body go limp and he closed his eye's in exhaustion.

He never noticed as he slept the crate being bolted closed.

Not even a half hour had passed since his landing and the ship already headed out of port towards the east.

* * *

 **Chapter 3 is done! I'm going to take some more time to explain this chapter. Raiga is a firm believer that the whole of Takigakure is perfectly aware of the fact that Suien slit his mothers throat, that is the reason he has such animosity towards them and feels no remorse abusing their good will towards him.**

 **I know perfectly well that during these mid-chapter timeskips I powered him up a lot, but in all honesty it wasn't _too_ much. He learned Chakra Control, his element and how to train it, as well as a single Jutsu. I think that in a span of 2 years that's a fair amount to learn. Note that he's only 5 still, he doesn't turn 6 for another month from when the chapter ended. He currently has no Taijutsu aside from basic self defense, his body isn't near mature enough to deal with the strain of proper body training.**

 **Chomei calling Raiga Rai-gaki is a nickname that he came up with, and Raiga has such a respect for the Bijuu that he doesn't mind in the slightest. Their relationship isn't exactly friendship like B and Gyuki or what Naruto and Kurama eventually gained, but it is definitely a polite acquaintanceship. They have no issue with each other, and Chomei was even worried for Raiga when he asked to use Chomei's Chakra.**

 **The ending is where the name "Plot Thief" came from. Raiga is, by nature, a thief. He takes what he finds to be useful whether they be Jutsu, Weapons, etc.**

 **Where is Raiga going end up? Follow/Favorite to find out on my next update. Don't be shy to review, I love'em!**


	4. Dorobo

It had been a day since Raiga's escape from Takigakure. It couldn't be considered a defection due to him not having been a Shinobi, but his actions were deemed extremely criminal.

Currently the Honored Council was meeting, along with the Shibuki in Shiburo's place.

"Raiga Uzumaki has stolen from us! Whether or not he is a Shinobi is irrelevant! He _deserves_ to have his name placed on the Bingo Books for the world to see!" Boomed Toru, second seat of the 5 seat council; also known as the Honored Council.

Takigakure's Council system worked systematically with 5 groups, a Jonin Head, a Merchant Head, the Village Leader which was Shiburo and two Elders to take advisory positions. This council, naturally, knows everything about Taki no Kuni. Toru being the second seat is relative to his council rank based on position. The Village Leader holds the first seat, the Jonin Head the second, Elders third and fourth and the Merchant head fifth.

The Elders Kai and Torin looked to one another and sighed. This was a disaster. The Blast Corps had done such devastation that Shiburo decided he needed to consume the Hero Water in order to save the village. It worked, true, but he had consumed enough of the drink to kill him the moment the fighting was over.

They stared at Toru as he ranted before Kai cut in, "The reason that this is up for debate is not to determine whether or not he goes into the Bingo Book, because the tool _does_ , no, we need to determine how much to put in there."

Toru looked confused, "He committed a major theft while we were under siege." As if that explained everything.

It didn't.

Torin spoke this time, "And what do we write? That a boy, not even 6 years old, was able to steal all of our Fuinjutsu, Raiton and Kinjutsu? Or should we just put in the books that he stole the Nanabi and let all the other villages clamor for out missing weapon?"

Shibuki cut in finally, "What do you mean he stole the Nanabi? What is the Nanabi?"

Torin looked to Shibuki sadly. Shiburo had not deigned to inform his son and heir about the village as much as he should have, sad as it was, "The Great Tree used to be the nest of the Nanabi, one of the Bijuu. When our fathers and forefathers claimed this land, they had to battle the beast, and though we do not know how they did it, they eventually sealed it into a Kunoichi. Later on when she was nearing her death she deemed her nephew, Raki, to hold the Nanabi."

Kai cut in as Shibuki looked entranced, "Nearly 2 decades later Suien came to me and informed me he had an Uzumaki. The Uzumaki clan was known for 3 things, their longevity, large Chakra pools, and Fuinjutsu skills. They made absolutely perfect hosts, so it was determined Raiga would become the third host of the Nanabi. Bijuu hosts hold the title of Jinchuriki."

Shibuki slowly nodded, "I guess that makes sense. When I saw him leaving the village… His entire body was surrounded by a red shroud of Chakra and he had wings sprouting from his back."

All of the council members looked quite shocked by this, but that was natural. Raiga was _five_. 5 year old children normally are barely able to do the leaf sticking exercise, yet he was able to wield a Bijuu's power so young?

His threat level spiked exponentially with that statement.

"You are sure that he was covered in such a shroud?" Spoked Genjin, the Merchant Head. He remembered Raki well, the man was a fool that was drunk off of power and was the major reason he retired from the Ninja Corps to become a Merchant. He remembered very clearly the devastation Raki sowed to their enemies when Taki was forced to get involved in the 3rd Shinobi War.

Shibuki nodded, "He looked like a bug."

"The Nanabi is the only Bijuu that is capable of flight. Its title is the Nanabi no Kabutomushi for fair reason. In layman's terms it is a big, overpowered, bug. He wasn't even supposed to know about the Bijuu until he was a Chunin, and by the pace he was setting that would have been by the time he was 7 most likely, possibly 8." Toru grudgingly admitted.

The only reason Shibuki was even here was as a token of respect towards his father until a new leader could be elected.

"We will note he stole from our vaults and took with him our weapon in the Bingo Book. It won't give much away, but it will inform others we are weakened, which Iwa will do soon enough anyways." Toru reaffirmed.

The decision was met with nods all around aside from Shibuki, "So… Raiga is officially a Nukenin now?"

The group looked annoyed, "In all but name; he chose both the best and worst time to leave. He wasn't officially a citizen since he wasn't born here nor did he file to be one. We were waiting for him to be a Shinobi. No, he isn't a Nukenin, but he is a criminal of the highest degree in Taki."

Shibuki nodded his head, sad at the loss of both his father and the betrayal of his brother.

* * *

Tsunade was currently performing her favorite pastime.

Drinking.

It had been almost 3 years now since she had last seen her godson, and was close to giving up. She looked to her necklace, proof of her loss. It had killed her brother not even a week after she gave it to him. It had killed her lover, when she gave it to him the day before he was sent out onto that dreadful mission. It had killed her best friend when she went to help Konoha's injured from the Kyuubi. It all meant one thing in her depressed mind.

Konoha was at fault for them all.

The village had taken her Grandfather via assassination, her Granduncle via combat. Her parents were murdered on border patrol. Her clan dwindled down to just her…

The village had taken far too much from her to come back any time soon.

Currently she was in Tani no Kuni, the Land of Rivers at a small village with an open bar. Shizune was currently in Tanigakure getting their traveling supplies. The girl was very well aware of the current position Tsunade was in, and offered her full support in helping her find Raiga.

As she was about to put another shot of sake into her system her drinking time was interrupted by Katsuyu summoning herself in one of her larger forms at her table.

" **Tsunade-hime, Shizune-sama has news."**

Usually nothing of note happened with them that required Katsuyu, "What is it?" The buzz she was under made her out to be much ruder than she normally was, though she tended to be rude as well.

Katsuyu understood this.

" **It would be best to reverse summon her, Hime."**

That was rare, Tsunade mused. Katsuyu was not a fan of reverse summoning, moreso due to the fact that the size of her body was paramount to the amount of Chakra she used when summoned. She preferred her smaller forms since the larger she was the harder it was to be useful in anything aside from combat.

"Whatever you think is best, Katsuyu."

The slug nodded and out from her body came a very confused Shizune holding a book.

A Bingo Book at that.

It took Shizune half a moment to understand what was happening before she immediately turned her attention to Tsunade as Katsuyu returned home, "Tsunade-sama! Turn to page 131!"

She looked skeptical but did so…

And nearly dropped the book.

 **Name: Raiga Uzumaki**

 **Title: Dorobo (Thief)**

 **Affiliation: Uzumaki Clan**

 **Age: 5**

 **Born: 7/7/041 SVE**

 **Rank: Civilian (Training around Genin level)**

 **Appearance: Raiga Uzumaki is male, standing at 3'4. He has red hair much like the majority of his clan and amber eyes. Note that should he ever take off his shirt there is a hexagonal tattoo on his upper back**

 **Abilities: Base Twin-Sword Kenjutsu training and Raiton Elemental training**

 **Crime: During an invasion on Takigakure, Raiga Uzumaki stole the whole of Taki's Fuinjutsu, Raiton Techniques and Kinjutsu as well as their most powerful weapon.**

 **Wanted ALIVE: Takigakure – 2,000,000 Ryo**

Tsunade was trying to understand what she just read.

Raiga Uzumaki, her godson… Held an A-rank bounty on his head?

What the hell?

She read the Crime more carefully and after a few minutes passed she finally understood.

And with her understanding she let loose a scream of rage.

He was turned into a _Jinchuriki!?_

Oh, heads would _roll._

But, as she calmed, though she noted that the trees outside looked great for venting, she took in the fact that he had already been trained. A Raiton element was expected based on his father, but the Twin-Swords were curious. Either Taki knew about his father, Raiga himself knew, or it was an innocent coincidence.

Meh.

She knew he was around Taki, and was also aware that he was likely had already left. If he were already captured then they wouldn't need a notice on their Bingo Books.

"Shizune!"

She threw her bottle of Sake against the bar wall and walked out, without paying at that.

"We're heading for Taki."

"Hai, Tsunade-sama!"

* * *

Kakuzu stared at the newest addition to the bi-monthly Bingo Book.

He couldn't help it, he honestly couldn't.

He laughed.

A _kid_ had done what he himself did, stole from the Takigakure archives. Only he took more and with much less blood.

Yeah, the kid earned the title of Dorobo.

It took the last bit of honor the old miser had to not immediately go hunting, but anybody that fucks over Taki deserves a bit of time to run.

A year, he'd give the kid a year before he started the hunt.

In memory of Taki.

* * *

Danzo was currently staring at the newest Bingo Book and he couldn't help it, he really couldn't.

He scowled.

What kind of _idiot_ would let their weapon turn rogue? When he was _five?!_

Truly Taki was not of the same caliber of the 5 Great Shinobi Nations, and this proved it.

Still, the boy was young; malleable. Konoha's own Jinchuriki was only 2 at the moment, too young to train and even then Hiruzen, the fool he was, wouldn't allow the weapon to be trained.

Yes, if he wasn't planning on using the Kyuubi as the beast was born to be used for, then Konoha needed a different weapon.

9 may have been the villages, but 7 would be ROOT's.

A slow smirk formed on his scarred face.

* * *

Raiga was currently sitting in a waiting room.

In handcuffs.

Why was he in handcuffs, one might ask?

Well, hiding out in fruit cargo turns out to be a good spot to eat when there were no other alternatives. So, during the 10 day boat trip to wherever he was being brought to, he did 2 things. He chatted with Chomei, and he ate.

Bananas were quite good.

Still, once the boat had docked and the ship workers found a quarter of that specific cargo loads worth of bananas gone and instead found a kid?

They were not pleased.

But _noooooo,_ they couldn't have docked in, say, a civilian operate town?

Fucking ninja.

The moment Raiga was being yelled at a group of Shinobi made their way over, claiming their sensor felt an enormous signature.

They then put him in cuffs and trekked to their Hidden Village.

2 days of walking brought Raiga to where he was now, with only one thing to do.

He was currently annoying the secretary.

"Mabuuuuuuuiiiiiiii~~~"

Mabui was a dark skinned woman, with large breasts and blond hair.

Raiga knew that the Raikage did not hire her for her people skills the moment his eyes landed on those jugs.

She looked quite annoyed that the Kaminari no Kuni patrol dropped Raiga onto her so they could speak to the Raikage.

Still, she was the secretary to the Raikage, she dealt with his bouts of violence and the annoyance of his brother.

Children were nothing, "Yes Raiga?"

Raiga looked quite cute, she noted. He'd be a looker when he became a man.

Kumo didn't have enough proper men- "How big are your boobs?" Strike that, that boy was not even a man and he already wasn't proper.

Damnit.

"Raiga, you don't ask a woman questions like that."

"Why?"

"It's rude."

"Why is it rude?"

"It's a personal question that you don't need to know, when you don't have reason to ask for something or need, it can be rude. And it was."

Raiga stared at her hard; truthfully he did not understand why she went through the effort of answer the question when she could have just ignored him. But he couldn't help it, people that bothered were the most fun to mess with, Robert always said. Raiga was now Robert, so…

"Why?"

Mabui groaned at her desk as the door to the Raikage's office opened and the patrol guard walked in. He then roughly grabbed Raiga by the chain of his handcuffs and moved towards the office.

When Raiga entered with a sullen look he noticed one thing very distinctive.

The Raikage was a monster of a man.

Standing at 6'4 with his Kage robes, minus the hat on he was imposing. His body was that of a bodybuilders and he clearly looked annoyed at Raiga.

Which did not bode well for Raiga.

The patrol guard gave a bow towards his Kage which was met with a short nod before heading out of the room, leaving the 2 alone.

A stared hard at Raiga before pointing to the chair in front of his desk.

Raiga bolted to the seat.

"Do you know why you're here boy?"

Raiga squirmed in his seat, "Yes Raikage-sama."

"Why are you here then, boy?"

"I uh, I ate a bunch of bananas and stowed away on your ship…"

A stared at Raiga for a moment before he let out a booming laugh, "Bananas!? Hah! No, you are here to join _my_ village, U-zu-ma-ki."

The _former_ Civillian Council had bribed one of his top Jonin who was also playing the role of emissary for what was supposed to be the Kumo-Konoha alliance. The fool had broken the treaty before it could be signed and attempted to steal the Hyuga heiress, which ended up getting him both killed and ruining the treaty. _Then_ they went behind his back even more and demanded the head of the clan head.

He murdered the whole of the Civillian Council.

This entire scenario happened less than a month ago.

Raiga just blinked before he too began to laugh.

A stopped laughing while Raiga continued, "Why are you laughing boy?"

Raiga wiped a tear away and gathered himself before speaking, "Raikage-sama, I honestly thought I was in trouble."

A nodded, "Oh you are, there's no question. And your punishment is to join my corps, else I'll just let you rot in a cell until you're old enough to fuck and I can remake the Uzumaki Clan in Kumo."

Raiga stilled immediately at that; he was serious? It hit him instantly, the Raikage wasn't aware of what he did in Taki, at least not yet. His status as Jinchuriki wasn't out in the open; though it hadn't been a full 2 weeks since his escape yet.

"May I name a condition?"

A shrugged, "You aren't in the position to make conditions boy, but you're welcome to ask."

Raiga swallowed lightly, "I'd like to be trained under your brother."

That threw A for a loop as he looked at the Uzumaki boy, "Why?"

And so Raiga told him. How his mother's throat was slit and he was stolen by Taki, he was the Jinchuriki of the Nanabi, his opinion of Taki, he was a Raiton user, he already had training and had used the Version 1 cloak already, his theft, and how he ended up in that crate.

It was easy for A, oh yes, there was no question. He thought he stumbled onto a gold mine? Oh no, no, no, he stumbled onto a gold mine along with a _mountain,_ for free.

A made his way over to his window before punching it and breaking the glass, after doing so he inhaled a large breath before roaring " **BEE!** " at his village. Raiga winced, rubbing his ears at the sudden noise coming from the Raikage.

A moment had passed in silence between Raiga and A, the only noise coming through the room were from the now broken window until _another_ window was broken, this time by the body of Killer B.

"Watchu need bro, I was 'bout to start a show!"

A noted that was Bee-speak for he was about to sing in front of the whole of his village and be a general annoyance.

Perfect timing.

"Congratulations, you have a new student along with Yugito."

Bee paused before looking directly at Raiga with a big grin, "Yo lil' man, Bee gunna' make you strong, that's ma bro's plan!"

Raiga blinked before getting out of his chair so he could bow, "Thank you Bee-Sensei, Gyuki-Sama."

 _That_ caught Bee's attention immediately, "How you know that name? Ain't nuthin' I told nobody but bro, such a shame." Which was true; Bee had wanted to spread the word that the tailed beasts weren't weapons but beasts with personalities with names as well. Gyuki, however, was not a fan of letting just anybody know his sacred name after Shukaku was the first to be sealed. It was an unnecessary weakness.

Raiga blinked, "Chomei respects Gyuki immensely. He claims him to be his favorite sibling aside from Isobu and Kokuo."

This time Bee just looked speechless whilst A looked perturbed, "You know the names of the Bijuu?"

Raiga nodded, "Chomei and me are cordial; not friends yet, but we like each other well enough. He is easily excitable and is happy to tell stories of his family."

A nodded whilst Bee just looked at Raiga with a slack expression. It didn't make _sense_ to the rapper. He had to literally fight the Hachibi before he learned Gyuki's name and this kid knows his Bijuu's already?

So unfair.

A reached into his desk and pulled out a white headband with a Kumogakure hitai-ate attached to it. He walked around his still dumbstruck brother and undid Raiga's handcuffs before tying the headband onto the child's head.

"In Kumo, we have an unspoken rule. We will never allow a child to be promoted past the rank of Genin until they are at the very least at the age of 12. Enjoy the next 6 or so years of D-ranks."

He then picked the stunned Raiga up, placed him into his brothers arms, then kicked them both out through another window.

He stared at the flailing boy and laughing Bee before nodding and returning to his work. This meant a lot of paperwork. But it'd be worth it.

* * *

 **So this was a very last minute thing. I literally just spent a few hours on my computer, typed this up and submitted it the moment after. Anyways, time for the breakdown.**

 **I took the opportunity to mention the council in Taki purely so their aggravation was understood. But also to the fact that is was just a huge slap in the face for them that they lost their Jinchuriki so damn quick.**

 **Tsunade needed some more scenes, so yeah.**

 **Kakuzu was something I thought funny.**

 **Danzo is Danzo, which means his idea's are likely to cause problems.**

 **And his joining Kumo. I'll be honest, from what I saw I like Kumogakure the most of all the Hidden Villages, and Taki is my favorite aesthetically. Konoha is nice, there's no question, but it's just overdone. Plus, he's a Jinchuriki, how else is he supposed to master his Bijuu without war to make Kumo fork over village secrets?**

 **Next chapter will be a major timeskip, and by major I mean _Major._**

 **Remember to Favorite/Follow and give me reviews!**


	5. Karin

Yugito Nii was a girl of many qualities. She was the Jinchuriki of the Nibi no Nekomata. She was solid proof in Kumo that blondes were not dumb since, sadly, A and Bee-shishou were not especially smart. But right now there was another quality that could be mentioned.

Annoyance.

When B-shishou didn't show up on time for their afternoon training, she admitted to being annoyed. But she also understood that her Shishou was a man that was easily distracted, and so she passed the time by meditating and attempting to speak to the Nibi. The beast itself was standoffish and snarked at her whenever Yugito attempted conversation. It aggravated her immensely, but when Bee told her, and then she had to think about what he said for it to make sense, that the Nibi had essentially been Kumo's prisoner since its founding she could understand the Chakra monsters attitude.

But no, the true reason she was annoyed was because an hour or so later Bee _finally_ came back, but he didn't come back alone. In a fireman's carry over his was a boy with wide amber eyes, striking red hair and a poorly tied Kumogakure Hitai-ate on his brow.

Now the fact that Bee brought somebody else for their session was not the reason for annoyance, he often added diversity to their trainings. Nor was it the age, Bee happened to have a soft spot for children, though he had no desire for any of his own.

The reason for her annoyance was simple; the boy was apparently her new training partner.

She did not _want_ nor did she feel the _need_ to help a brat and he was obviously too young to know anything useful enough to warrant Bee-shishou's attention.

She made her thoughts known.

"Bee-shishou, why do I have to train with a brat?!"

She never cared much for subtlety, a trait shared between her Shishou and Kage respectively.

He didn't look bothered by the comment in the slightest, "Yugi-chan, we gotsa show the lil' guy what we know! Ain't no way we gon' let the new Shinobi o' Kumo go with no trainin', bro says so."

She took a moment to piece together what he said in her mind before continuing, "Why would Raikage-sama care about a brat?"

"Kiddo be part of a clan, Uzumaki; the folks with a long lifespan, bam. Bro wants him nice 'n trained up, so he can show 'em Kumo's stuff, sup."

Her eyebrow was twitching, a known sign of both confusion and aggravation, before she retorted, "So he's a clan kid, just get some other people from his clan to train him." Though she would admit she was curious, Kumo did not have any official clans, at least not anymore. They had bloodlines for sure, but since the founding of Kumo the original Ranton clan and their like just forewent their clan names and married into the Kumo populace.

Raiga, who was lying on his back looking at clouds, chose that moment to speak up, "There are only 3 Uzumaki aside from me that I know of, the rest of them are buried."

She blinked, not expecting a 5 year old to even be capable of speaking so fluidly, she sure wasn't that capable at that age, "What are you talking about?"

Bee also spoke up, "And who be the clan you know lil' man? Bro wants to know, fo' sho'."

Raiga shrugged, "The Uzumaki clan were renowned throughout the world for 3 things, their longevity, their naturally high Chakra reserves, and their Fuinjutsu. Take for example the seals that the hidden villages use to seal Bijuu, aside from Suna, were all either bought of stolen from the Uzumaki. So you should understand how valued their work was."

She nodded, frowning at the mention of sealing Bijuu.

He continued, "Well, the Shinobi Nations decided that we were too dangerous, our clan was so strong and well located that they were stealing jobs from Kiri and Kumo, as well as sharing with Konoha who were their big ally. So Kiri and Kumo teamed up, Iwa joining in because they wanted to loot the clan, and destroyed the Uzumaki."

Yugito was paying attention to the boy that hadn't bothered to stop looking at the clouds strongly. Such history had not been taught to her and it was quite fascinating.

"Truth be told, even though the group essentially destroyed Uzushiogakure, the village the Uzumaki clan headed, it hurt Kiri and Iwa more than anything. Fun fact, even though Iwa, Kumo and Kiri all worked together, they weren't allied. The Nidaime Tsuchikage and Mizukage killed each other during this assault. Kumo got out of the way and, due to the Kage battle, were unable to loot. After the battle Kumo lost their Nidaime Raikage days later from wounds sustained in the attack." He knew these details from his history courses in Taki, but that was irrelevant.

He grinned slightly, "But there was a reason that after the clan was destroyed survivors were and are so sought after. Multiple reasons even, but 2 predominant ones. The Uzumaki elders sealed their most dangerous Fuinjutsu so well that in order to even attempt to gain access to them there needed to be a living, _willing_ Uzumaki member to offer blood onto the seals. Nobody knows how they did it, but willingly given blood versus stolen blood holds different properties to the Uzumaki."

Yugito's curiosity was overtaking her as she listened raptly to the boy in front of her. Bee was also quite curious since he had never heard such a detailed explanation as to why the Uzumaki were so desired aside from their natural container status. Raiga only knew these things from Takigakure's logs. Taki was an ally to Konoha, and through them were able to trade with the Uzumaki clan for a seal for the Nanabi. They had learned this information during the trading process, but deemed it essentially unnecessary.

"Anyways the other reason is due to the Uzumaki clan's natural longevity and Chakra reserves, making us ideal Bijuu hosts."

Yugito stilled at that, her eye's widening in understand as to why Bee-shishou had brought the kid with them.

Raiga took that moment to sit up and look her in the eye, sporting a slightly mischievous smile he spoke in a childish tone far different from the way he spoke earlier, "My name is Raiga Uzumaki, Neko-chan. But you can call me Nana-kun if you feel like it."

The Nanabi; that was simply mind blowing to Yugito. It was hard enough for her to accept her status as a host, and she'd been one for nearly 5 years, but for Kumo to gain a third Bijuu?! Yes, she understood perfectly why Raikage-sama wanted him so badly. She only had one thing to say…

"If I'm Neko-chan you're Mushi-chan."

Raiga immediately scowled. Bee took that moment to speak up, "But what 'bout them 3 other clan, Raiga ma' man?"

Raiga lifted his scowl and gave Bee a flat look, "Kushina Uzumaki, my clan head, though I haven't heard much from her so i'll assume she's either dead. or retired Her son, Naruto, he's 2 years old I think. Finally, and this is just a rumor I heard when I was leaving Taki, that somebody with red hair and weird rippled eyes killed Hanzo the Salamander and took the post of Amekage. Uhhh, Oh! He wore a black cloak with red clouds on it apparently. Anyways, it's just a gut feeling that that's an Uzumaki, even if it's a false rumor."

Raiga didn't care in the slightest that nobody was supposed to know about Nagato until Shippuden. His entire existence was bullshit upon bullshit in the form of Madara then Danzo then Obito. Still, it wouldn't due to have people be _too_ suspicious of him, so he claimed he thought Kushina was alive.

Bee's eye's widened exponentially at the mention of an Uzumaki killing Hanzo. Hanzo was well known for naming the Sannin, who all were S-ranked Shinobi; Kunoichi in Tsunade's case. Rumor or not, it was well known that Ame had closed its borders 7 years ago, and that was also the last anybody had heard of Hanzo. Plus the description of the eye's disturbed him; Gyuki had informed him about the Rinnegan, and that sounded way too familiar for it to be ignored.

His bro needed to know this, fo' sho'.

* * *

Time had passed quickly in Kumo, and in comparison to Taki Raiga was happy to admit he genuinely enjoyed it here.

In his first year under Bee, he worked on his Chakra Flow technique as well as help in a Twin-blade Kenjutsu style. It was also determined that he needed a Taijutsu style, which he and Yugito worked on.

Yugito's own style worked around her ability to lengthen her nails at will and it made her find swords unnecessary. Bee's, similar to A's, wasn't truly a style and more a coordinated brawl. They didn't really need a style so much as they needed something to fit the berserker power that was Raiton no Yoroi and the Tailed Beast state.

Raiga's style was centered on speed, close combat and flight. He was a natural at Chakra Flow, and after he managed to manipulate it around his blades he moved on to increasing the friction of his legs. Using that he would move around foes quickly and deliver hard, or at least hard for his age, blows to enemies. All of this was executed using his Chakra Wings, which kept enemies distracted and aided him in escapes if deemed necessary. No point in fighting an opponent that can kill you when you can literally fly to get out of the way.

Raiga had also moved in with A during his first year, since Yugito wasn't old enough to take care of a kid and Bee…

Nobody felt the need to risk turning Kumo's newest Jinchuriki into a rapper.

The setting itself was slightly uncomfortable for a few reasons, mainly due to the fact that A was only letting Raiga stay there due to the known fact that jinchuriki tended to be close to their Kage. Raiga was an unknown, it was better to have him close than risk him doing what he did in Taki and steal village secrets.

Still, the two fell into a routine after a while.

It was during Raiga's second year in Kumo that he finally delved into the scrolls he stole from Taki. First he looked at the Raiton techniques he stole, and he only felt one thing.

Disappointment.

He showed A the scrolls one night and the man had just snorted after going through them, stating that these were all techniques that Kumo either created or stole. There was literally no technique in there that Kumo did not already have possession of.

With that Raiga moved on to the Kinjutsu. The reason he was saving Fuinjutsu for last was due to the fact that Fuinjutsu in itself was extremely complex and took much more time to comprehend than most Jutsu ever would.

The Kinjutsu scrolls, however, were amazing.

Taki was apparently very good at collecting Jutsu, but the primary Jutsu in the Kinjutsu chest had derived from Konoha. It had taken Raiga a solid week to learn his first Jutsu, but he was proud of it.

The Kage Bunshin no Jutsu.

Naruto, Raiga learned, was very smart when it came to learning techniques but had the attention span of a squirrel, which was why he assumed Naruto never bothered to learn much aside from the clones, summoning and the Rasengan.

When Raiga thought of Naruto, he then did something that baffled A. He bought boxes filled to the brim with water balloons, rubber balls and normal balloons.

Raiga laughed maniacally after purchasing those items.

It was during the month after learning the Kage Bunshin no Jutsu, which he was able to create nearly 100 of them before reaching exhaustion, he assumed the only reason Naruto was able to make them in the thousands was due to his seal purifying Kuama's Chakra, that he learned his second Kinjutsu and his favorite technique.

The Bunshin Daibakuha no Jutsu.

Explosions were Raiga's friend.

During his third year in Kumo, he at age 9, had officially moved in with Yugito, and as a going away present gave A his Kage Bunshin scroll.

The man had shed a tear in thanks before understanding the fact that Raiga had kept this to himself for years.

At that point Raiga felt the true wrath of an angry Kage for the first time and he decided he'd never do so again.

Now Raiga was in A's office, along with Bee to hear an announcement from his Kage.

A grunted on his couch whilst a myriad of clones were hunched over his desk doing his paperwork and tossed a Bingo book at Raiga, "Page 131."

Raiga opened the book and skimmed it, his bounty page.

 **Name: Raiga Uzumaki**

 **Title: Dorobo (Thief)**

 **Affiliation: Uzumaki Clan**

 **Age: 9**

 **Born: 7/7/041 SVE**

 **Rank: Unknown (Training presumed to be around Chunin level)**

 **Appearance: Raiga Uzumaki is male; height is unknown but it is presumed he is to be at 4'0. He has red hair much like the majority of his clan and amber eyes. Note that should he ever take off his shirt there is a hexagonal tattoo on his upper back**

 **Abilities: Base Twin-Sword Kenjutsu training and Raiton Elemental training**

 **Crime: During an invasion on Takigakure, Raiga Uzumaki stole the whole of Taki's Fuinjutsu, Raiton Techniques and Kinjutsu as well as their most powerful weapon.**

 **Wanted ALIVE: Iwagakure – 5,000,000 Otogakure – 4,000,000 Amegakure – 10,000,000**

Raiga looked the entry over with slight scrutiny. For the most part nothing had changed, aside from some minor things. For example the presumption of his height was off; he stood at 4'2, not that anybody really cared. His clothing consisted of light grey Shinobi pants, steel toed boots and a black hoodie with a mesh undershirt. The most interesting addition to his wardrobe came in the form of his Twin-swords which were strapped to his back.

The book also stated that his training was presumed to be around Chunin level, and while that was true he was nearing Tokubetsu Jonin status. He wasn't at Tokubetsu Jonin status already due to his age; regardless of his talent he was far too young to be nearing Jonin level in any disciplines. The more interesting changes were to his bounty, "Why did my bounties change?"

A nodded, "Iwa wants the Nanabi, however they would extract it from you, not make you join their village. Oto, I'm not certain. I'd guess that since they're new they want some power, so they'd try for the Bijuu, maybe your genes. Ame is probably the same as Oto."

Raiga did not believe that entirely. A's belief of Iwa was likely correct, but Oto was ruled by Orochimaru. Raiga was good experiment material to the man. Ame, however, was ruled by Nagato and Obito in turn, they wanted the Nanabi for the Gedo Mazo.

"No, the important thing that you need to note is that your bounty in Taki was rescinded."

Raiga blinked then looked back at his page. Sure enough, there was no note of Takigakure aside from his crime, "Huh… Wonder why they did that."

"So do we, but it doesn't matter. You are no long wanted with them, meaning there is no reason we can't let you into the field." A did not appear completely happy about that, but he understood that Raiga had, over time, become a loyal Kumo Shinobi and it was only due to his status with Taki that the boy didn't go on out of country missions.

Raiga immediately brightened up; A-sama had refused to let him do any missions outside of Kaminari no Kuni due to his bounty. The man was strongly against the idea of Raiga leaving Kumo borders before he deemed Raiga of being capable of fending off multiple Jonin.

"You will be going on a C-rank mission with the possibility of turning B-rank along with Bee here in Kusa no Kuni. The mission is to turn in a pair of bounties to Kusagakure."

Raiga grinned and offered a fist to Bee, who immediately bumped it with an equally wide grin. Raiga was grinning due to his first mission out of Kaminari no Kuni and Bee because this was the first time in years he had a vacation.

C-ranks were vacations to S-rank Shinobi.

The two looked over at A, waiting for the man to continue. He tossed a scroll to Bee and nodded, "Dismissed."

They left by breaking separate windows. Windows that happened to let wind into his office and blew the paperwork his Kage Bunshin were doing all around.

There was much cursing.

* * *

Tsunade was currently looking at her newest bingo book dejectedly. It finally happened, she presumed.

Raiga had been captured.

It was a common tactic many villages used when they captured a bounty, that they didn't remove a name from a Bingo Book so that bounty hunters went after already dead prey and avoided that villages other wanted Shinobi in search of said dead prey.

She sighed, truthfully after 6 or so years and no sign of him aside from his first appearance in the Bingo Books; she had begun to give up. Her trip to Taki after the bounty had been placed turned out to be a complete waste of time; Takigakure was one of the few hidden villages that was _actually_ hidden. She didn't know how to get inside, and even then the country was on lockdown since their leader had just died.

At the moment, Tsunade was in Kusa no Kuni, in a small unnamed village that had an inn. She wasn't in the mood to go near a Kusagakure, the place was too large for her to sulk, and she had a shot of sake in her hand.

Shizune was also sad, but moreso due to the fact that now that Tsunade-sama had stopped looking for her Godson she focused her attention on her vices.

Melancholy was all that was apparent for the duo.

* * *

It had been a week since A-sama gave Raiga his first out of country mission and he could honestly say he was content. The trip to Kusa was fun for him and Bee, due to the route they took. They passed through Shimo no Kuni, Yu no Kuni and Hi no Kuni in order to reach it, and he was honestly quite amazed by the sights.

Shimo no Kuni was curious due to its unknown status. Frost Country was the only country with a hidden village currently allied with Kumo, primarily due to their location. Hotspring Country had always been a curiosity to Raiga since he was born there. And Fire Country was where he was supposed to go if not for the untimely death of his mother.

Kusa, Raiga found, was aptly named. The country was littered in grass fields the size of a human, and while Kusagakure was poorly hidden, the village still held a naturally beauty that intrigued him.

Bee was just happy to finally get out of Kumo. His bro had essentially locked him up after the 3rd Shinobi War and the only time he ever got the chance to leave was when he escaped.

The duo were currently making their way out of the bounty turn in station with the appropriate sum of money in a storage scroll. They had decided to make the trip nice and long they would stay in Kusagakue for a week and claim they had no choice.

Currently they were in a bar, Bee was getting appropriately sloshed and Raiga was enjoying the food Kusa had to offer.

Raiga was just about to order some of their famous grass rolled sushi when he spotted a tuft of red hair in a booth where a smaller tuft of red could be seen. He looked to Bee, noting that his shishou was currently incapable of being useful, even though his personality already wasn't helpful. He decided to go and sate his curiosity.

He took off his hi-tai ate, placed it in his pocket and walked over to the duo, dropping himself down inside the booth and startling the two inside it. They looked to be a mother and daughter pair, the older of the two had cropped red hair and grey eyes, along with clothes that covered the entirety of her body aside from her face while the daughter had similarly short red hair with a singly tuft of spikes, as well as exotic red eyes and glasses.

The mother cleared her throat, sounding annoyed and looked Raiga over, "Can I help you child?" She sounded like a highborn type, making Raiga all the more curious.

"It depends."

"On?"

"If you're members of my clan or not." He leaned back, watching the woman's eyes go wide as she immediately focused on Raiga's form and he in turn to hers. He noted her clothes moreso than anything, and more specifically the fact that he couldn't see a single piece of skin below her chin. She wore a hakama robe as well as a long-sleeve turtle-neck undershirt with long gloves hiding her hands. It was strange to him that she refused to show any skin, but it wasn't his issue.

He quit his musing when the woman reached over the counter and grabbed his chin, he looked directly at her eyes, a curious gray color, and noticed how they were watering. She smiled lightly and removed her hand, calling for her tables waiter to bring a third cup of tea and returned her attention to Raiga, "It appears the people of Uzu live on, mm?"

Raiga grinned, he was right, "Scattered, but yeah. Names Raiga." He decided not to bother with his surname, if she was clan she knew not to mention it too loudly. They were destroyed for a reason.

She nodded, "I am Kaide, and this is my daughter Karin." The now introduced Karin squeaked before shyly offering a "hello." Kaide continued, "And what might you be doing so far from the sea, cousin?"

Raiga grinned further, and pulled out his hi-tai ate from his pants pocket so she could see, and upon her eyes slightly widening he nodded and returned it to his pocket, "First out of country mission, we had to turn in some bounties."

Her eye's dimmed, "The clouds aided in the end of the swirling tide; why would you hide amongst them?" Raiga noted she seemed to talk poetically, fitting her regal appearance well.

He shrugged, "It was either serve or rot in a cell till I could, and I quote "Fuck to restart the clan."

She choked lightly at the bluntness of his words while Karin's entire face went beet red; she had only recently been taught about the birds and the bees and such wording was all very new to her. Kaide collected herself and sighed, "It seems the clouds have only taught you the brashness that comes with their thunders."

She studied Raiga's form for a moment before her eye's glinted, "It seems that it is my duty as your elder to teach you the elegance of the whirling tides."

Raiga blinked, he needed a moment to process what she said similarly to what he needed to do for Bee-shishou but in a different way. He figured it out and he abruptly shuddered.

She was going to teach him _manners._

* * *

Bee was perfectly fine with Kaide taking Raiga in during their vacation, in fact he was ecstatic. His exact words were, "Yo! Raiga be gone so Bee ain't gotta feel bad 'bout leavin' the lil' man to hang while Hachibi-sama goes to get some tang~."

Kaide balked for 2 reasons at that. 1, she would never speak so bluntly to a child about sex and 2, he was the Hachibi Jinchuriki. When she asked Raiga about it he merely showed her his Bingo Book slot which caused her to balk once more before enveloping the boy in a strong hug.

Raiga had slowly grown accustomed to the poetic woman's random hugs, but he wouldn't deny he enjoyed it. He rarely got physical attention, though he admitted to being a loner anyways, and he would admit that with her status as an Uzumaki as well as her habits he had accepted her as an aunt of sorts.

Raiga did not, however, enjoy his lessons with her. She was a slave driver, and was very adamant about him learning to talk properly as well as treat a lady, which she forced Karin to take that role when they went about their lessons much to the girl's embarrassment.

Karin was a breath of fresh air for Raiga; she was still considered a civilian. Raiga rarely interacted with civillians aside from merchants and shop workers. Conversations between the two tended to be slow as they attempted to understand their points of view.

Raiga had also informed Kaide about Kumo and subsequently their beliefs. He was very vocal in the fact that the Nidaime Raikage was a very different man than the Sandaime and his Yondaime, and though the attack and destruction of Uzu was sad, all of the Kage's of that time were dead and the grudges that came should follow them into the grave. She, naturally, was not an immediate supporter of such an ideal, but she eventually agreed that it was best to leave grudges behind.

Currently Raiga and Bee were packing up to leave, they had spent a solid 8 days in Kusagakure; Raiga with Kaide and Karin while Bee stayed in the local brothel. Kaide had requested the two of them for a word before they left, which the duo were perfectly fine with. As they finished sealing their equipment into storage scrolls, made by Raiga, they found their way to Kaide's living room and sat on her couch facing directly in front of Kaide, who was standing in the middle of the room in a bathrobe.

She cleared her throat, "I thank you, cousin and… Hachibi-sama for speaking with me." Never let it be said that she enjoyed calling Bee such a name, but he insisted and her manners forced her to comply.

"I will forego my usual form of speech and be blunt. I request you take Karin back with you to Kumo."

Raiga's eye's widened, as did Bee's. It would work well, Raiga would have a distant relative nearby and Kumo would gain another Uzumaki, however…

Raiga cocked his head to the side, "Why? You seem to be in decent health, there's no reason you can't take care of her."

Kaide sighed, "Kusagakure… It is not what one might think. True, I am treated well enough now, but that was not always the case." Before Raiga or Bee could question her she took off her bathrobe, showing her nude body to the duo. Raiga immediately blushed and looked away while Bee just stared. Bee then grabbed Raiga's head and forced him to look, and what Raiga saw astounded him.

Bite marks were everywhere. There was not a single area on her body that was below her chin that did not hold bite marks on her skin.

Kaide sighed as she gave them a moment to look over her body, "I never taught you much clan history, did I?" She asked Raiga rhetorically. Not giving him the chance to reply she continued on, "Uzushiogakure was a land made up of very few non-Uzumaki shinobi. The Uzumaki blood however, was separated very much so. We had multiple divisions that all followed a head of a corps, and that head was a part of a council that was governed by the clan head's family."

She took the time to sit down on a chair and spoke more, "My family in the Uzumaki clan was the head of the Healing Corps. For generations, we had healed Uzumaki and outsiders, and it became such an important part of my family that it literally became part of our blood and Chakra." A tear fell from her face as she continued to speak.

"As I'm sure you've noticed; I don't have a husband. Kusa found me when I was a survivor of the Uzushio massacre and forced me to have her against my wishes. Don't misunderstand, I love Karin, but if she doesn't leave the same thing that happened to me will happen to her."

Tears continued to fall down her face as she wiped them away, "When the injured bite into me, my Chakra naturally converts into Medical Chakra, and heals the blood of the bite and also goes into the mouth and body of whoever bit me; healing them at the cost of my Chakra.

If Karin stayed here, then I can almost guarantee she would be used as I have been the moment I die."

Kaide took that moment to collect herself and her tears fully, "The reason I asked you to only take Karin is because of the side-effect of being bitten so much. I can't gather my Chakra to be used for anything but Iryojutsu, including basic travel. We'd be walking at a civilian pace and that'd take weeks to get from here to Kumo."

She continued on, no matter the somber mood in the room, "Karin is already aware of what was likely to happen if I died, and I fear it would have happened soon."

She knelt down on the floor and pressed her head to the ground in submission, "Please… Don't let them hurt my Karin."

B looked at Raiga and Raiga at B before they nodded to one another. Raiga looked down on Kaide and spoke clearly, "We will take Karin on one condition."

Kaide looked up to her cousin nervously as he continued, "You are to produce a scroll containing your techniques for Karin and her future children's use." Her tears began anew as she muttered her thanks over and over and nodded frantically.

* * *

It had taken Kaide a solid 2 days to write out her techniques and any additional information that Karin and Raiga might need on their clan. Raiga and Bee, while not entirely happy, were content to wait for her to finish. They spent their time training and communing with their respective Bijuu.

When it was time to leave Karin carried a backpack that held labeled storage scrolls. Kaide then walked over to Bee and gave him a scroll, "These are the techniques for Karin _and_ Raiga. You're the Jounin, you will be responsible for them. Know that they cannot be opened from any but willing Uzumaki." Bee shrugged and grabbed the scroll.

Kaide knelt down to her daughter and enveloped Karin in a strong hug, "Be safe and strong musume. I do not know what the clouds are like, but if these two are any indication their people will be fair to you." She then gave Karin a prolonged kiss on the forehead and pushed her towards Bee, who took her by the shoulder.

Kaide lastly went to Raiga and also enveloped him in a strong hug, "Take care of my daughter, cousin." She released him and smile lightly to the trio. Bee was quiet for once, Karin was openly crying and Raiga held a somber expression.

Bee grabbed Raiga by the shoulder and Shunshinned away.

* * *

They had been traveling for roughly 8 hours and were nearing the border of Kusa no Kuni. Karin, being a civilian, needed a break, which Bee and Raiga complied with easily enough.

It was during their break that things changed, Raiga was calmly sharpening one of his swords with a wetstone, Bee was muttering to himself and writing in his rhyme book and Karin was eating a ration bar. Bee, being the Jonin, sensed something was off and calmly pocketed his book and pencil.

It was at that moment that a hail of Kunai and Shuriken barraged the trio.

Bee grabbed Karin and jumped away while Raiga, using his Chakra Wings flew out of the attack.

They looked around and it was then that a group of ninja, numbering between 40 and 50 troops surrounded them.

Raiga began to sweat as he looked at the masks; they were blank with the exception of a single inscription in their foreheads.

Ne: ROOT.

One of the ROOT Shinobi spoke up in monotone, "Raiga Uzumaki, you are to come with us."

Bee took that moment to get in front of Raiga, who was hovering lightly. Bee handed Karin over to Raiga and spoke sternly, "Raiga, ya' gon' run; Bee gon' have some fun, 'son."

Bee then did something Raiga had never seen, though he had always wanted too, in his 3 years of knowing his Shishou.

He fully transformed.

A mass of tentacles and muscle erupted from his body as the ROOT Shinobi backed away. Less than a second later the colossal form of Gyuki stood over the whole of them, _**"What I be sayin' Raiga? Run so Bee can have his fun! You Shinobi! SAYONARA!"**_

Raiga took that advice immediately and flew away with Karin, though not quick enough as one of the ROOT Shinobi was able to send a senbon needle through his left lung whilst he escaped.

While Raiga was running Bee/Gyuki began to dance, _**"Hachibi-sama be me, Killer Bee! WEEE! Ya' done messed up, gunnin' fo' Raiga is not wassup. Ya' best be prepared to meet yo' Mama because…"**_

A mass of energy formed in front of his mouth and expanded so much that a sphere of the darkest black appeared in Bee/Gyuki's face.

" _ **BIJUUDAMA!"**_

The blast immediately destroyed the clearing the trio were at, but also killed the majority of the ROOT Shinobi in the area.

Raiga and Karin, however, found themselves slammed with the destruction of Chakra that was the Bijuudama and subsequently were tossed through the air to parts unknown.

* * *

Tsunade, along with Shizune, was on the southern edge of the Kusa no Kuni border with Hi no Kuni. She had decided it was best to stay closer to the Hi no Kuni border lately. Regardless of her feelings towards Konohagakure, Hi no Kuni was still her home and she didn't like being far from the land.

She was about to take a swig of one of the many bottles of Sake she nabbed from Kusa when she heard an explosion in the distant north. She turned towards that direction, and moments later saw something she couldn't comprehend entirely.

A giant bug went sailing in her direction and landed roughly a quarter of a mile south of her.

Naturally she was curious, so she called for Shizune and headed over to the bug.

After a sedate walk she stumbled upon a girl with hair the same color as her dearly departed from Toka fumbling about a pair of broken glasses and littered in bruises. Tsunade was making her way over when the girl took sight of her and rushed over.

Karin, finding a stranger and not bothering being suspicious based on the gravity of her situation, immediately ran over and began to beg, "PLEASE! Please, get some help of something, Raiga's bleeding out!" She the pointed over to what Tsunade thought was a bug, only to find a boy with a hood over his head face down in the dirt.

Tsunade, upon hearing the name quickly made her way over to the downed boy and removed the hood of his jacket and couldn't stifle the gasp that escaped her lips.

Tears began to form in her eyes as she took in the sight she had been searching for for 6 years.

Tsunade Senju had at long last found her Godson.

* * *

 **Hey, i'd like to once again apologize for replacing the original Chapter 5. With that out of the way, i'm gunna go over some details. I didn't bother to go over many abilities Raiga had gained in the 3 years this chapter went over for a few reasons, but nobody needs to know too much. I gave hints, but the hope is to surprise some folks in the later chapters.**

 **Karin is one of my favorite characters in Shippuden, so naturally I wanted to add her into my fanfic. I'm not certain what her position in the story will be in the later chapters exactly, but hopefully it makes for an enjoyable read.**

 **The ROOT Shinobi thing will be explained more later on.**

 **Tsunade finding Raiga was something I had wanted to expand upon, which was one of the major reasons I decided to rewrite this chapter instead of doing a mass time-skip.** **How will Danzo react to the knews that his men died? Why did Taki rescind Raiga's bounty? What will Tsunade do now that she found Raiga?**

 **Find out if you Favorite/Follow. Don't forget to Review!**


	6. Summons

Shibuki sighed as he went over paperwork in his new office. In the infinite wisdom of the Elder Council of Takigakure, it was decided that since his father did well as a leader that Shibuki would make a valid replacement.

Idiocy.

And to top it off, upon his ascension to Village Leader, Suien attempted a coup with a few fellow Jonin and Chunin, claiming that Shibuki wasn't strong enough to lead, which Shibuki himself agreed too. The issue was that they weren't interested in negotiation, they just wanted Shibuki's head, so he had to banish them. It was during their banishment, when the list of crimes Suien and his group performed were being read out that Suien happily informed the populace of Taki that he was responsible for their gaining a Bijuu vessel.

Upon further interrogation Shibuki found himself in inner turmoil as the truth came to light. Suien's claim that Raiga's mother offered him was a falsity, in truth he ordered her murder and sold Raiga to Genjin, the Merchant Head in exchange for an S-rank missions pay.

Shibuki finally found himself understanding the boy he once thought of as a kid brother. His mother was murdered while she was holding him and a week later he was turned into a Jinchuriki. It made sense now why he trained so hard, and why during a spar he hit Suien so hard in the genitals that the man could no longer reproduce. The theft of their Jutsu was a crime, but his escape made sense finally.

Shibuki looked over the Bingo Book that he updated recently in regards to both Raiga and Suien. Suien was given an A-rank bounty after escaping interrogation and killing the majority of their I&T department. Raiga, was a different situation. He had gained bounties from other countries, meaning his warrant on the Bingo Book could not be removed. Shibuki did, however, remove the Takigakure bounty on Raiga's head, in hopes that the false death strategy would help him, temporarily at the very least.

* * *

Danzo scowled as his ROOT agent finished his report. This agent was the sole survivor of the massacre wrought by the Hachibi Jinchuriki. That kind of power was exactly why he wanted the Uzumaki male so badly.

Still, he finally got a proper look at the boy, through the use of Fu's various Mind Jutsu. And more importantly, along with the Nanabi Jinchuriki was an Uzumaki female, young and malleable with civilian training; a perfect, example of good luck.

He would bide his time once more, with the Nanabi Jinchuriki training under the Hachibi Jinchuriki, he would be more likely to use his Bijuu properly when the time came for him to become one of the many roots that held of the great tree of Konohagakure.

* * *

Nagato stared at the bounty that had been rescinded, his Rinnegan blazing in fury but on the outside he was calm.

So the Nanabi was lost and needed to reform, how droll. Still, the official plan for Akatsuki wouldn't begin for another 7 or so years anyways, their numbers were too low to consider starting the Hunt as of yet. The only disappointment would be that the Nanabi, one of the more powerful Bijuu, would be free from its container. As the only Bijuu with flight it was guaranteed to be a chase.

Slowly his Deva Path smirked and put the bounty away.

Yes, that would be acceptable; it couldn't be called a Hunt without worthy prey after all.

* * *

Raiga awoke in an unfamiliar bed, with his equipment missing and bandages wrapped around his torso. He slowly remembered the events that injured him in the first place and his face formed a scowl. He had been out of country for the first time in 3 years and already he was injured.

There was no way A-sama would let him out again for a long while.

He slowly got up and walked into a living room where he saw Karin and a vaguely familiar dark haired woman chatting animatedly in a fast pace. He didn't bother to say hello, he understood that since they healed him that they weren't enemies. He walked passed them, ignoring the surprised gasp from both Karin and the woman, who then ran out of the room muttering something, and headed inside the small houses kitchen to grab a glass of water.

As he drank he came across the sight of a blonde haired woman rushing towards him along with the dark haired woman in tow. As he studied her he noticed one thing very distinctive.

The Yin Seal on her brow.

He blinked as she made her way over and blurted out, "Baa-chan?!"

Tsunade scowled lightly at the remark and retorted with a snap, "Don't call me that!"

She then processed the fact that her Godson called her that and returned to rushing at him and engulfing him in a hug and babbling incoherent apologies to him.

Raiga was confused, but he did understand that he hadn't seen baa-chan since before he was taken captive by Taki. With that in mind he slowly returned the hug, silencing Tsunade and the two felt comfort in their mutual grasps and silence.

Tsunade looked down at the crimson scalp of her Godson. Karin gave her the general information of Raiga that the girl was able to grasp, such as that he was a Kumo Shinobi who came to Kusa on a C-rank with his Shishou, who turned into a giant octopus-bull.

Tsunade may not have been a big fan of Kumo, but she wasn't a big fan of any of the Hidden Villages. At least Kumo was strength oriented; Kiri, Suna, Iwa and all of the other minor villages would have either turned him into a weapon or extracted the Nanabi from his back and killed him. But now that he was back she knew what she wanted.

She wanted to take him to Konoha.

* * *

Days turned into weeks into a month as Raiga, Karin, Shizune and Tsunade found themselves in Hi no Kuni; Tanzaku no Gai to be specific. Raiga told Tsunade that he needed to speak to her in private, so while Shizune and Karin were off doing their own thing they were in their hotel room staring at each other from their mutual seats.

Raiga began to speak, "We've been traveling for a little over a month and I need to know where we're going; you've danced around the subject constantly Baa-chan." He had refused to call her anything but Baa-chan, much to her annoyance.

Tsunade groaned at the term of endearment but finally huffed, "We're traveling so I can get to know you better, and once I think you're ready we'll be heading to Konoha." She watched as Raiga's eyes widened before they thinned into slits.

"I'm sorry Baa-chan, as much as I like traveling with you I'm a Kumogakure Shinobi. I won't be joining Konoha. Besides, I know you don't really want to go there; you still think of it as the place the killed your family."

He was blunt, Tsunade noted. Still, the mention of her family was a lowblow. She had told him in confidence, and he in turn told her about his life. She was sad for how his life turned out, but content to know that even though he was a Jinchuriki he was happy. She was shocked to say the least when she learned the history of the Bijuu from Raiga, and found herself questioning her Grandfather's decision to distribute the Bijuu.

"You're a loyal Kumogakure Shinobi but you've been skipping out of your home for over a month; that's long enough to be moved from MIA to KIA."

He shrugged, "A-sama cooped me up for 3 years purely because Taki was after me, and I view this as both a vacation and payback." She noted his elegance in speech; it was impressive for a boy of 9.

She let loose a sigh, it was sad that he viewed Kumo as his home, but they were good to him and she wouldn't tear him away. Still, she wouldn't follow him to Kumo; even if she though Konoha to be what took her family, it was her home.

"And what are we supposed to do? I refuse to lose you after just finding you." And that was true, she would fight tooth and nail against whoever attempted to take Raiga. The fact that Danzo was still active disturbed her; she put the pieces together when Raiga told her the story of how he found himself injured. ROOT was supposed to have been terminated, the fact that they still were active showed signs of treason.

Raiga nodded, "I've come up with a way to make it so we can keep in contact and meet up on occasion in a way that doesn't make me have to go with you to Konoha nor your with me to Kumo."

She listened with intrigue as he continued, "I ask to sign the Slug Contract."

She blinked and before she could respond he continued, "I am aware that Katsuyu is the only member of the Slug Summons, however she is also most likely willing to ferry letters between the two of us."

Tsunade mulled it over and slowly spoke, "It's not a bad idea, but Katsuyu would be the deciding factor. Plus, even if she said yes you'd need to sign a sub-contract stating that you won't use her to harm Konoha knowingly. She swore allegiance to me as her head summoner, and in turn to Konoha."

Raiga nodded, "That's fine with me."

Tsunade looked away as she pricked her palm with the end of her nail and performed the Kuchiyose no Jutsu. As sad as it was, even though she helped birth Raiga and boy was that a bloody mess, she still held on to her haemophobia.

Katsuyu appeared in a plume of smoke in one of her larger forms, the size of a couch and stared at Tsunade, **"Yes, Tsunade-hime?"**

Tsunade cocked her head over to Raiga, gaining Katsuyu's attention, "He's Raiga, my Godson. Wants to know if he can sign your contract."

Katsuyu fully turned her large form over to Raiga, studying him with her antenna-like eyes, **"Are you a healer, Raiga-sama?"**

Raiga shook his head, "I'm the Jinchuriki of the Nanabi; 'fraid that my Chakra Control will never be up to snuff to be a healer."

Katsuyu cocked her antenna-eyes to the side and appeared confused, **"Why would you wish to be one of my summoners if not for my aid in healing?"**

Raiga looked serious, "3 Reasons. Firstly, you are the best healer in the whole of the Summons realm, making you an ideal companion regardless of my being a healer or not. Second, I am not a Konoha Shinobi, I'm loyal to Kumo. With that in mind, me and Baa-chan wouldn't be able to talk much, but sharing a Summoning Contract could help with that.

Thirdly, I wish to learn Senjutsu in the future."

Tsunade was nodding along until he mentioned that and idly choked out a gasp. Senjutsu was extremely dangerous, and contrary to what one may think of Katsuyu, Slug Senjutsu was even more dangerous to learn that Snake Senjutsu. Katsuyu had offered only once, and upon explaining the process to become a Sage for the Slugs Tsunade instantly refused.

Katsuyu slowly made her way over to Raiga and allowed her Chakra to seep into his. It was one of the reasons she was considered the best healer of the Summons realm. She held the natural ability to seep her Chakra into the skin of others, both Medical Chakra and other. She reeled her Chakra back into her body and nodded, **"You may sign my contract, Raiga-sama. Senjutsu, however, is rarely learned both due to its difficulty and that we Summons that know how to use it dislike sharing our secrets to the untrusted. Perhaps in the future, but I hope you will not ask about it any time soon Raiga-sama."**

She backed away and from her mouth came a large scroll, roughly the size of Raiga's torso and many times thicker. Raiga took the scroll and opened it, noting that it held thousands of blacked out signatures with only Tsunade and Shizune being alive. It was confusing that she had so many dead summoners, since Summons themselves were only as old as the Bijuu, roughly one thousand years old, but Raiga didn't voice it. He idly bit his thumb, ignoring Tsunade's wince, and signed his name on the scroll and pressing down his finger prints.

Katsuyu absorbed the scroll into her body and turned to Tsunade, **"Please teach him of the contract Tsunade-hime, I must go now."** Her form disappeared in a plume of smoke and Tsunade looked over Raiga who was grinning broadly. At least now, even when they were separated, they wouldn't ever be too far apart.

* * *

2 weeks had passed and Raiga, along with Karin finally left Tsunade and Shizune near the border ot Shimo no Kuni. They made their way through to Kumo in 2 days' time, and when A saw Raiga come in 2 _months_ after his first out of country mission?

Raiga received a full formed Iron Claw, Raiton no Yoroi and all. Bee, hearing the commotion came running to his bro's office to see Raiga's upper body encased in the office wall; the only part of Raiga's body that was visible were his legs. He, naturally, began to rap about how proud he was of Raiga for skipping out for 2 months whilst using his butt as a drum.

That was a moment Karin would remember for the rest of her life.

She was introduced to the Raikage, and he basically told her that she could join Kumo, but would be expected to bear a couple of kids in the future. She already decided early on that she wanted a big family, since she tended to be lonely when he Kaa-chan was working late shifts, so she agreed. He then sent her to Mabui to fill out citizenship drafts and Academy admittance forms.

Yugito was quite emotional in the beat down she gave Raiga. She had honestly thought he was dead, 2 months MIA in Kumo normally meant the person was KIA. She then latched onto him and refused to give him any breathing room for over a month. It didn't help that they lived together, she had essentially forced him into her bed- not in a sexual way but more along the lines of ensuring he didn't escape in the middle of the night.

Raiga just stared out the window of Yugi-nee's room as she used him as a body pillow.

He was content.

* * *

Time had passed once again in Kumogakure. Raiga had begun to delve into his Fuinjutsu Scrolls after his tenth birthday, and aside from training with Yugi-nee and Bee-shishou, he devoted the majority of his time into the scrolls.

It had taken him 3 solid years to finish with them.

During those 3 years, the only major changes to his routine were that he began to incorporate Katsuyu in combat scenarios and Bee-shishou decided on his 12th birthday that it was time for him to start working with Chomei. He hadn't yet opened the seal to fully use Chomei's Chakra, but his body needed to get used to the feeling of having the corrosive Chakra running through his system. He had, primarily due to his good relationship with Chomei, been able to control 2 tails instinctively. On the 3rd tail he was reminded of his escape from Taki; the raw emotions that he was feeling and barely able to reign in.

He had also been contacting his Baa-chan a bunch, and she even gave him some good pieces of advice for Fuinjutsu and Chakra Control. They didn't meet up much, but when they did they always made the best of it, whether that meant gambling together, getting Raiga drunk or training was irrelevant to Tsunade.

Karin had also thrived, her natural affinity towards Iryojutsu found her in a pseudo-apprenticeship to the Raikage's own assistant Mabui. She had also gained a close friend in the form of a girl named Karui, and her cousin Omoi by extension. It was from their friendship that Bee took an interest in the cousins, and eventually volunteered to be their Jonin-sensei.

After Raiga had finished with the Takigakure's Fuinjutsu scrolls he began the process of creating his own personal Fuinjutsu. He vocally proclaimed that, since he was an Uzumaki, he needed some form of seal to be his staple. He had also buckled down with Karin on her mother's scrolls and found many interesting pieces of Fuinjutsu, as well as history, from the scrolls.

Strangely enough, Raiga also developed a secondary affinity during that year; Water. He had hoped for Wind, due to his use of Chakra Flow, but decided that so long as it wasn't Fire he was happy. All elements had their pros and cons, but Fire held the least amount of pros of the 5.

He had forced Kage Bunshin to train up his Suiton Affinity as an experiment; he wanted to see the difference between training the normal way and the Naruto way. Naturally, he didn't pull a Naruto by dispelling all the clones at once and allowed them to dispel one at a time with 2 minute minimum intervals. The information strain was hard enough like that, nobody should have been able to handle hundreds of Kage Bunshin popping at once.

It was determined that while the Naruto Method worked, training an affinity the natural way also got the body used to Suiton Chakra. Kage Bunshin only worked with the mind; they did not help train the body, thus making elemental training only half as effective. Still, he worked on his affinity with his clones, he just needed longer to get his body used to Suiton than expected.

Using his newly developed Suiton Affinity, Raiga learned his 3rd Kinjutsu.

Mizugakure no Jutsu.

It was stolen from the Mizugakure during the 1st Shinobi War by Konoha and traded to Taki at some point between the 2nd and 3rd. The reason Raiga was so happy he learned the technique was due to the fact that unlike Raiton, Suiton focused more on flowing ones Chakra.

Which meant that Raiga could overpower Mizugakure no Jutsu so much that when he used it on C, the villages top sensor, the man felt completely blind purely based on how much Chakra was being forced into the Jutsu.

Karin, who had been found to be an amazing sensor and was quickly taking C's position, also found herself unable to pinpoint Chakra signals like she normally could. She could make out Chakra, but was unable to name it nor was she able to tell if they were allies or enemies.

The fact that she could sense at all in while inside the technique shows her prowess as a sensor.

Finally on Raiga's 9th year in Kumo he devoted his whole time to self-projects. He, at that point, was able to control 4 tails worth of Chomei's Chakra, and was nearly capable of controlling the fifth. His Fuinjutsu research had made a breakthrough, and on his 15th birthday, when Bee-shishou gave him some of Gyuki's ink for a present, he had used to ink to tattoo his personal array onto his body.

The tattoo's looked exactly like the Uzumaki clan symbol, and he had 3 swirls on each arm, from his shoulder, to the elbow, and settling on the back of his hand. Connecting them were curved lines that intersected through Chomei's seal on his back. He had then tattoo'd the same array on his legs, adding Uzumaki swirls from his foot, to his knee, to his thigh connected to a seventh swirl located on his lower back and from there lining up to Chomei's seal.

When A had seen the seal work for the first time, he was quite mad; as were Bee and Yugito. It was considered extremely dangerous to tamper with a Jinchuriki's host seal, and Raiga had done more than tamper, he altered it in such a way that the seal itself was different. What used to be a hexagon with kanji surrounding it turned into a hexagon with Uzumaki swirl seals surrounding it.

Still, when Yugito, on A-sama's orders, tested Raiga's new combat seals in combat and lost to Raiga for the first time in her life, it was decided that the experiment was worth it. However, the seals upon his body were considered to be Forbidden Sealing Jutsu, or Kin-Fuinjutsu.

The final change in his capabilities came in the form of Katsuyu, who claimed that Raiga had earned her trust over the 5 years he held her contract, and that soon she would permit him to attempt to learn Slug Senjutsu.

* * *

Raiga awoke to a messenger bird with a note tied to its leg tapping its beak against his window. He got out of bed, not bothering with his nudity and disturbing his partner, opened the window and grabbed the letter from the bird. He lightly patted the birds scalp feathers before shooing it away.

He always hated being woken up by messenger birds.

 _Genin Raiga Uzumaki,_

 _You are ordered to appear before you Raikage_

 _At 10 am today for an emergency meeting._

 _Tardiness is not acceptable._

 _\- Mabui_

Raiga scowled lightly and tossed the paper into the trash before looking at his clock. The time was 8 am, he normally was up by 6, but today was a day off and he intended to spend it lazing about with his girlfriend.

On the note of his girlfriend he looked over and saw messy haired form of Karin, blinking blearily at him. She hit puberty when she was eleven and came into a figure only recently, much to both of their enjoyment.

Their relationship had always been friendship, though Karin had a crush on Raiga much to his obliviousness. When Raiga defeated Yugito in a spar, Karin jumped him on his return home and after a bit of sake was in their systems lost their mutual virginities to each other. After the event, Raiga had asked what brought this on, to which Karin answered the Yugito always claimed she would never be in a relationship with somebody that was weaker than her. There were only 3 people, 4 now that Raiga beat her, that were stronger than Yugito; A, Bee and Darui. Karin figured that unless Yugito and Darui were together in secret she would forego the age difference and jump Raiga, so Karin made the first move.

He did not complain, and when Yugito learned of this, she stated that even if she were interested in Raiga it wouldn't matter; she was infertile and he was to restart a clan, nothing would come out of a relationship between the two.

Karin looked Raiga over, in the 6 years that she had known him he had grown well. Standing at 5'7 with a light tan, tight muscles and an impressive amount of stamina, she mused that she was indeed a lucky girl, "What was the letter for?"

Raiga groaned and answered as he headed inside his apartment bathroom, "Got a meeting in a couple a' hours at A-sama's office." He began a bath and as the water was running he brushed his teeth. Soon after he descended into his bath.

As he cleaned his body the door opened and in walked Karin, similarly nude. She brushed her teeth and took a seat between Raiga's legs in the bath. She started grinding her hips and looked at him with an intense stare with her exotic red eyes and a seductive smile.

What the hell, Raiga thought; he still had 2 hours before the meeting.

He pounced.

* * *

A, Yondaime Raikage, was in his office waiting.

It was 10:05.

He _hated_ lateness; it irritated him immensely.

In his office were his brother Bee along with the man's newest students Karui and Omoi as well as Samui, who helped the two out on occasion with Kenjutsu.

A really did not like Raiga at the moment.

The boy was normally fine, if a little easy to distract. His various Fuinjutsu projects tended to keep him busy, but when they worked _they worked._ The fact that he beat Yugito in an all-out fight and still had plenty left in his tank cemented his position.

He was an S-rank Genin.

A supposed that Raiga did not like A either, based on the fact that A refused to promote him. At first it was a long term punishment for skipping out on 2 months with a foreign S-rank Kunoichi. Then, when A decided that he suffered long enough and was going to promote the boy he went and altered his seal; without any supervision!

If he made the slightest mistake he could have set the Nanabi on Kumo.

As A mused to himself Raiga finally came in. He had changed his look slightly over the years. His clothes included a grey long-sleeve hoodie with a black armor-vest over it. His pants were black like his vest, but unlike most Shinobi he wore steel toed boots. He had two kunai pouches on each waist, in all of his armor-vest pockets were fuinjutsu materials and premade scrolls, and on his back were a pair of Twin-blades. The final change to his attire came in the form of his hitai-ate which was now held by a long cloth and strapped sideways to his head.

A grunted, his annoyance known throughout the room, "Raiga, why were you late?"

Raiga stood stock still for a moment before he did something that made A twitch.

He eye smiled, "I got lost on the road of life and found myself in paradise." Raiga found that his favorite member of the Manga to emulate was Kakashi; Robert claimed that he was the greatest troll in the series.

A, along with Karui and Omoi all groaned in unison and slapped a palm to their faces while Bee sniggered and Samui muttered a "not cool."

A removed the hand that was over his face and stared at Raiga, "Get in line." Raiga followed that order quickly and stood between Karui and Omoi, all in front of Bee and Samui.

A looked them over, "Congratulations, you are now the first team from Kumogakure to join a foreign Chunin Exam."

Raiga's interest was piqued immediately. Kumo, unlike the rest of the Elemental Nations, focused primarily on 2 manned cells instead of 4 man teams of 3 Genin lead by a Jonin. True, the cells were trained by a Jonin, but once the basics were down they were left to fend for themselves.

A-sama and B were a team focused on frontal assault.

C and Darui were a team focused on long range. C used his unnaturally strong sensing abilities along with Darui's Ranton for precise and deadly assaults.

Omoi and Karui were a duo on their own, focusing on Kenjutsu and close combat.

He himself was being groomed to be a team with Yugito, hence why they at one point shared an apartment. Their team was meant to be a frontal assault team like A and B.

Still, the major reason why this was so interesting was because Kumo has only ever participated in the Chunin Exams when they themselves were hosting it. The fact that they were going to a foreign one…

"Why?"

A scowled, "The Hyuga mess that happened 9 years ago. After I killed the civilians who ordered the abduction and nearly risked war behind my back, I attempted to redo the peace talks. Suffice to say nothing came out of it."

He rolled his large shoulders as he continued, "Sarutobi didn't trust me any more after that, I wouldn't either in his case, and rejected my offer to talk. However, he recently sent a courier informing me that during the Chunin Exams he'd be willing to renew peace talks. Whether or not we actually go from neutrality to peace, I don't care; but I want to hear the old shit flinger has to say." That was a slur that the Sandaime Hokage had earned during the 2nd Shinobi War. He mass summoned his Monkeys to raid a Kumo outpost, and as it ended the entire area smelled of one thing; feces.

A gave the trio a look over, "Furthermore, this is the first time that a trio of Genin that were taught by the same Jonin that were available for selection. Your mission is to join the Konohagakure Chunin Exams and have at least 1 of you join the Finals. The Finals are where I'll be able to talk to Sarutobi freely, without hassle. Should you succeed, regardless of who makes it to the finals ou will all be promoted to Chunin." The Genin trio all grinned broadly, Raiga more so than Karui and Omoi.

A stared directly at Bee now, "And, you will all be lead to Konoha by Samui." Bee began to protest while the Genin trio all let out a sigh of relief, "This is non-negotiable. I'm already risking sending Raiga, a known Jinchuriki out to a non-allied nation; sending 2 might as well be declaring war. No, I'll let Bee come during the final portion of the exams."

They all looked satisfied so A, "You will spend the next week working on 3 man teamwork exercises. After that you will leave for Konoha; the exams are exactly 15 days from now, just over 2 weeks."

He stared at them all before nodding, "Dismissed."

* * *

Raiga grinned wildly as he walked back to his apartment. He was going to Konoha and finally he'd be able to fuck with the cast of the Manga.

He instantly decided to annoy Sakura, as well as make Sasuke look terrible. He'd turn Naruto into a slav- little brother figure. He had so much he could do.

But one thing is for certain, he'd be able to finally murder his most hated member of the Naruto franchise.

* * *

 **So, that was that. I had fun writing this, I was able to binge it in one session of 3 hours surprisingly. I did POV's for Shibuki, Danzo and Nagato because they matter; at least somewhat. Shibuki's POV was so you all understood why Raiga's bounty was rescinded. Danzo's was because he's a manipulative old codger. Nagato's however, was tricky. I wanted to make him a little sadistic, so I likened him to a hunter. I mean, regardless of not knowing about the Juubi, anybody who wants to collect the Bijuu to make a weapon has to have a sadistic side; regardless of reasons.**

 **I had a good few people asking whether or not Tsunade would come to Kumo or Raiga would go to Konoha, nobody bothered with a "Is there a way they can both be happy?" situation. So, to fix that I made Raiga sign the Slug Contract. I, at first, intended to make him sign a Fanmade contract for the Raccoons, but I liked the idea of the Slug Contract since it was well known and not overpowered like Snakes or Toads. The thing about the contract having thousands of dead summoners will be mentioned later on; its pretty important.**

 **Then I just did a timeskip, making sure not to give too much information on Raiga's abilities out but allowing you all to understand that he can hold his own now.**

 **Next Chapter will be the start of the Chunin Exams, and the beginning of Cannon divergences en mass.**

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	7. Chunin Exams

Naruto watched with a laugh as Sakura chased Konohamaru through the street. He had gotten some Ramen with her and Konohamaru, along with his friends Moegi and Udon, attempted to sneak up on them. Then after failing and asking whether or not him and Sakura were dating, which she denied vehemently, he said that Naruto dodged a bullet based on her forehead and chest.

Naruto had never claimed to be smart, he was the dobe for a reason, but even he knew that you never say that to a girl; especially a girl as punch-happy as Sakura was.

So he followed them and as he turned the corner he saw Konohamaru bump into a tall boy in a black pantsuit with a strange hood that made him look like a cat as well as an overdose on makeup. He looked annoyed and picked Konohamaru up by his scarf, "Watch where you're going you little brat!"

Sakura quickly lost her temper as she saw a larger ninja pick up the kid that insulted her. She inspected him, along with the blonde girl behind him, noting their headbands, "Hey! You Suna nin are trespassing in Konohagakure! State your intentions or I'll be forced to detain you." That was a word for word verbatim of what they were supposed to do when foreign ninja were in the village.

She never bothered to think about the glaring fact that she was in no way capable of detaining anybody with a headband based on her abilities.

The Suna-nin looked her over and snorted "Shut up pinkie." Sakura looked extremely annoyed by that comment.

The girl behind him cut it, "C'mon Kankuro, we don't have time for this." She seemed more amused that annoyed.

The now named Kankuro gave her a look, "Fine Temari, I'll make this quick." She shrugged and Kankuro cocked his fist back and was about to punch the kid in the face before a stone snapped at his hand from the nearby tree. He immediately let Konohamaru go, who sped over to Naruto along with Udon and Moegi and hid behind the orange clad Genin's leg with wetted eyes.

Kankuro looked up the tree and saw the form of a lightly tanned boy with a blue shirt and white shorts, "It's never smart to make a scene so far from home."

Sakura then decided it would be a perfect time to announce who spoke, "Sasuke-kun!"

Naruto grumbled a "teme" and Moegi looked like Christmas had come early as she took in Sasuke's image.

Kankuro was about to make a retort but he was, once again run into; this time by someone his size.

He fell over.

Team Seven, along with the Konohamaru corps and Temari all looked at who knocked over Kankuro. He was a boy looking to be 14 or 15 and looked slightly taller than the average person in that age group. His features included bright red hair and amber eyes, as well as a fair tan and a strong jaw. His clothing completely covered him in greys and blacks and he looked to be just as confused as Kankuro was.

Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura all noticed one glaring feature of this Shinobi that irritated them greatly.

The orange book in his left hand that showed "Icha Icha" on the cover.

Kankuro rounded on him, "What the hell is with all these people running into me? Oi! You startin' a fight tomato?!"

Raiga blinked at Kankuro, and eye-smiled in a very familiar way to Team 7, "My apologies, I got lost on the road of life it seems." He then put his nose back in his book and didn't move. Kankuro felt immediately awkward and backed away from the stranger.

They all finally noted the Hitai-ate tied sideways to his forehead showing his status as a Kumogakure Shinobi.

Sakura, once again, made her speech about having to detain him, this time with Naruto agreeing and Sasuke looking merely interested from his branch.

Raiga looked over at Sakura, walked up to her and with that eye-smile that reminded her so much of her sensei he patted her head, "Such a cute little duckling, making threat that she can't back up."

She was about to retort with a shout but he looked up at the tree Sasuke was in, "Oi! Ichi-chan, c'mon out!"

They were confused but Kankuro and Temari's expressions turned fearful in an instant. A second passed and in a swirl of sand a short red haired boy appeared before Raiga with black markings surrounding his teal eyes and a tattoo for love upon his brow.

He looked indifferent and monotonely spoke, "Why do you call me Ichi-chan, Kumogakure Shinobi?"

Raiga eye-smiled once more and spoke, "Well, I always wanted a little brother, and your lil' Tanuki is my favorite Beetle's bro, so I figured why not."

He blinked, before a manic grin spread over his face while Temari and Kankuro fearfully took steps back; they had annoyed a Jinchuriki.

"I am Sabaku no Gaara, and you?"

He closed his book loudly and was about to reply until a rock hit him directly in the head and knocked him over.

The Genin all looked at Raiga, then at who threw that rock and saw a dark skinned girl with red hair running at him with an extremely angry expression on her face and a boy with similar skin coloring and bleach blonde hair trailing after her muttering to his self. She got up to Raiga, completely ignoring the rest of the group, grabbed him by his collar and started flailing him, "Why did you ditch us the moment we signed in you Uzumaki prick?!"

Naruto's attention, which was already held, was immediately zoned in at the mention of his surname, as were Sasuke and Sakura.

Raiga shrugged, not bothering with removing himself from Karui's chokehold, "You know the Daimyo back home hates Jiraiya-sama and banned his books in Kaminari no Kuni. I'd always wanted to read Icha Icha and now I'm at the home of the very man that wrote them! It was my duty as a fan of his works, no, as a man, to immediately buy the full collection."

She looked extraordinarily pissed and began flailing him around more, "What about Karin?! You already have a girlfriend and I _know_ you two ain't innocent anymore! You don't need these stupid books!"

He retorted blandly, "I only wanted to read'em, she's the one that asked me to buy the set."

Karui stilled, before going as red as her hair and with a war cry threw Raiga down the street and stomped away. Omoi looked conflicted but followed Karui anyways since she was more likely to beat on him if he stayed with Raiga.

He got up, dusted his clothes off and turned to Gaara, who kept a blank look upon his brow, "So yeah, the names Raiga Uzumaki." Gaara nodded, then in his bland monotone spoke, "I look forward to spilling your blood."

Raiga blinked before nodding thoughtfully, "Tell you what, we'll make it a contest! Whoever spills the most blood wins!" Gaara's vicious smile immediately returned and he nodded instantly whilst all the other nearby looked on at the two redheads horrified.

Naruto then snapped out of his stupor and called Raiga out, "What do you mean your name's Uzumaki?!"

Raiga blinked, "Well, when a man and a woman get together because a man paid her and the woman's name is Uzumaki, and she learns she was pregnant, another Uzumaki comes out of her." He nodded, completely ignoring the reddening of Naruto's face.

"I mean, are you family?!"

Raiga shrugged, "I'unno, I don't know who you are kid." He knew perfectly well who Naruto was, but the trolling was far too much fun.

Naruto pouted before shouting, "The names Naruto Uzumaki –ttebayo!" All members of the group, save for Raiga and Gaara flinched.

Raiga blinked then turned to Gaara, "Hey Gaara, I'll let you have the emo looking kid in the tree if I can have this shorty." Naruto immediately protested his nickname but Gaara looked Naruto over, then turned to Sasuke and gave Raiga a short nod.

Gaara then turned to his team, "Temari, Kankuro, we're leaving." He willed his sand to wrap around their bodies without waiting for permission and they all disappeared in a swirl of sand.

Raiga then turned to Naruto, who looked somewhat fearful, "Sorry 'bout that blondie, but his type only understand the value of targets. I claimed you, so he won't try anything until he's killed his target." Sasuke's eye's immediately narrowed at the casual way the Kumo-nin spoke of his murder.

Naruto's voice rose, "I don't care! Are we family or not?!"

Raiga cocked his head to the side, "Well… The only Uzumaki I knew of that lived in Konoha was Kushina, so unless you're her sprog or some random Uzumaki that found his way over here then it ain't likely." Raiga did not care in the slightest about revealing classified information to Naruto; it was only classified to Konoha Shinobi, not him.

Naruto's eyes widened at the name before looking down, "I uh… I dunno, I'm an orphan. But Hokage Jiji always says he doesn't know who my parents were!"

Raiga blinked, "You're close enough to the shitflinger that he lets call him jiji?" Naruto started to cackle at the nickname while Sakura looked horrified and Sasuke just continued to stare at Raiga with an unfamiliar expression. Raiga continued with a shrug, "Well, all Shinobi and Kunoichi have to give blood for their village, so if you ask for a blood test on the chance she's your mother and you get the okay from him you should be able to determine whether or not you're her sprog. Till then you're just a kid I share a surname with."

Naruto immediately looked down at the ending, but his interest was piqued. He would ask his jiji if this Kushina lady was his kaa-chan, and if he didn't answer he'd do what Raiga said and ask for a blood test.

Sakura decided she'd had enough and started ranting, "Alright, you need to be detained! You come into our village when you are a Konoha Shinobi, you cause a scene and you called our Hokage a shitflinger!" She was pointing her finger at him with a murderous expression.

Raiga blinked, "You mean you don't know? The bi-annual Chunin Exams are being hosted in Konoha in a few days and me and those Suna-nin are all taking part in it. And shitflinger is something all Kumo Shinobi call Hiruzen Sarutobi, Hokage or not."

He then clapped his hands, book still in them and eye-smiled once more to the infuriated Sakura, "History time! So, the reason we call him that is because during the 2nd Shinobi War he summoned and army of monkeys to raid a Kumo outpost. The outpost was taken that day and when the monkeys left and the Kumo Shinobi came back to the outpost the entire place was covered in shit; there were no areas that weren't contaminated. He's been called the shitflinger ever since; I'm told whenever he hears it he starts laughing."

Naruto had tears in his eyes as he laughed, Sasuke snorted with a smirk and Sakura just had her jaw on the floor. She couldn't believe her Hokage had done something like that in the past.

Raiga shrugged, snapped his book open and ruffled Naruto's hair, "Alrighty ducklings, time to leave- Oh! Wait a moment, you're Sasuke right? The Uchiha?" He had turned to Sasuke midway through, and Sasuke himself jumped down from his perch to take part in the history lesson.

Sasuke nodded with a smirk at the mention of his name, "Yes I am."

Raiga nodded, "Yeah, some guy asked me to give you a message when we were on our way over." There was not a person that asked to give Sasuke a message, but Raiga could help himself.

Raiga walked up to Sasuke and with his forefinger and middle finger tapped the boy on his hitai-ate and whispered the words, "Foolish otouto" to Sasuke before darting away in a Shunshin.

As he made his way to his team, the rage filled scream that Sasuke let out was music to his ears.

* * *

Hiruzen Sarutobi stared at his crystal ball with an intense expression. At first he was just looking in on Naruto, until he saw Konohamaru come in to play and decided to watch the scene play out as a break from paperwork.

That entire meeting was peculiar. The Suna-nins who he knew were the Kazekage's children were one thing, but he honestly was not expecting Kumo to send a team; they had never done so before. Still, at least the Raikage was willing to talk of peace once more if he actually broke tradition and sent a team.

The conversations they held worried Hiruzen; he was unaware of the fact that Sabaku no Gaara was the Jinchuriki of the Ichibi. Rasa must have firmly held on to the belief that a Jinchuriki should be close to their Kage.

But the Uzumaki was what truly worried him.

Hiruzen was aware of Raiga Uzumaki's status. The container of the Nanabi who fled Takigakure when the majority of their Chunin and Jonin were busy defending the village from a raid. He then went and stole the whole of their Raiton, Fuinjutsu and Kinjutsus archives.

The title of Dorobo was fitting for him, if he was able to do all that at the age of 5 and not be caught.

But he had absolutely no idea that the boy joined up with Kumogakure. Then again, the village had always been heavy handed in their decrees; Raiga was most likely found and given an ultimatum.

Still, it was worrying since Kumo trained their Jinchuriki in such a way that they could potentially fully utilize their respective Bijuu's abilities.

But the truest form of worry that came in the form of Raiga Uzumaki was his relationship to Naruto. Hiruzen was not sure of how closely they were related, but Raiga was a true bred Uzumaki based on the signature crimson hair, and if he ever figured out Naruto was Kushina's son…

Well a number of things could happen, some pleasant, some unpleasant.

And he apparently had suspicions when Naruto asked about Uzumaki. It was sad that Hiruzen hid Naruto's lineage, but the lad wasn't strong enough to defend his person should it come out yet.

As he mused idly he looked towards his Crystal ball and worry turned into suspicion instantly.

Raiga Uzumaki was staring directly at him through the ball; it shouldn't be possible that the boy saw him.

He then slowly did some commonplace Shinobi sign language and Hiruzen processed the wording with fear.

 _Snakes have been known to spend their time in the sand this time of year_

Such a message… Could it be possible Orochimaru was involved with Suna in some way? Konoha's alliance with Suna was weak already; it wasn't impossible. But if it turned out to be a false message just to mess with Hiruzen, then he would have called out Suna for no reason and lead to more problems than anything was worth.

Hiruzen grabbed his pipe and instead of using his standard tobacco, he went through his drawer and pulled out a bag of a grounded green plant.

There was no way in hell he'd be able to handle such a situation sober.

* * *

Raiga, along with Omoi and Karui were waiting with their fellow foreign Genin in the Shinobi Academy to begin their Chunin Exams. They weren't doing much; Raiga was leaning against a wall near the entrance reading his literature while Karui and Omoi were bickering.

It was quiet, until the doors banged open and Naruto, along with his team walked in. He then began to speak loudly to his fellow Rookie 9.

Kabuto took his chance and walked up to the group, "You're being awfully loud, you should quiet down; the other teams already look annoyed."

The conversation halted slowly and they began to ask their questions to Kabuto, but the final one got his attention.

Kabuto spoke, "I specialize in information collection. I made some profiles for every contender in the Chunin Exams I'd need to watch out for in cards I call my Nin-info cards."

He shuffled them around and Sasuke stepped up, "I want information on Rock Lee of Konoha, Gaara of Suna and Raiga Uzumaki of Kumo." The Rookie 9 all looked interest and back with the rest of the Genin, Neji's attention snapped towards the loud group at the mention of Kumo.

Kabuto pouted, "That's no fun, you already know their names." He shuffled his cards once more and pulled out a three blank cards, "I'll start with Rock Lee." He pushed some Chakra into one of the cards and a holographic image appeared.

"Rock Lee is a Genin under the tutelage of Jonin Maito Guy, and is teamed up with Neji Hyuga and Tenten. His mission records stand at 67 D-ranks and 23 C-ranks. His skills in both Genjutsu and Ninjutsu are non-existent, however he makes up for it by having extraordinary high level Taijutsu."

"Next is Gaara." He pushed Chakra into a second card, "Gaara, also known as Sabaku no Gaara, is the youngest son of the Yondaime Kazekage. He is teamed with his siblings Kankuro and Temari and their Jonin sensei is a man named Baki. His record involves no D-ranks, 14 C-ranks and 1 B-rank. He apparently has never been injured in combat. His skills in Ninjutsu, Genjutsu and Taijutsu are largely unknown."

The group all looked surprised at that, but he moved on, "Next is Raiga." Naruto leaned forward as he pushed Chakra into his last card.

Kabuto stared at the card with a blank expression before his eyes widened and he let out a surprised gasp. He sputtered lightly but spoke anyways, "Raiga Uzumaki is an extremely unknown person; I wasn't able to get much information on him because it was only recently that information about his Kumogakure Shinobi status came to light. He is, however, known as the Dorobo in many circles including the Bingo Book."

The Rookie 9 blinked, "Thief?" asked Kiba.

Kabuto nodded with a serious expression, "When he was 5 years old he stole the whole of Takigakures Raiton, Fuinjutsu and Kinjutsu from their archives as well as their greatest weapon while the village was under fired from Iwagakure Blast corps. He has numerous bounties on his head from Oto and Iwa who gave him A-rank Bounties and Ame with an S-rank; all for him to be alive. The only placed he has a bounty for that wants him dead or alive is Kusagakure since he apparently stole the daughter of their top medic, who died days later; that one is a B-rank bounty. While he is largely an unknown, his stats upon defection of Taki included proficiency in Raiton as well as the use of Twin-blade Kenjutsu. That was over 9 years ago, so he could only have improved upon it."

Kabuto stared at the card hard whilst the Rookie 9 looked worried. The main group of Genin, upon hearing the stats of Raiga were all suitably freaked out since he was somewhere in the room.

Kabuto was looking at his card hard, and didn't bother moving as a tattooed arm reached over his shoulder and snatched it from his hands. He looked up with a surprised expression only to find Raiga Uzumaki looking over the card curiously.

Kabuto wouldn't admit it, but this Genin was the only factor he was truly worried about in the whole of the Exam. He was an unknown, even for Orochimaru's spy network. They knew he was a Kumo Shinobi, but they had no idea of his capabilities.

Raiga looked at the card whilst the Rookie 9 gave him suitably confused looks, "Huh… I stole Karin from Kusa nearly 6 years ago and had no idea they put a bounty out on me." They finally understood and gave Raiga and Kabuto a wide berth, save for Naruto and Sasuke. Naruto because this was a possible family member and Sasuke because he met Itachi.

Raiga looked at the card more specifically then grinned, "Hohoho… You're hiding things about me Kabuto-chan." He had a habit of calling anybody, male or female, chan just to annoy them, "See? It says right here that I'm something called a 'Jinchuriki', you should tell them about it." His grin was pronounced and he put the card back in Kabuto's still hands before returning to his position with Omoi and Karui.

The Rookie 9 looked at Kabuto, and as he was about to inform them what a Jinchuriki was a bang escaped the room and with it, so too did a plume of smoke appear. A group of Chunin appeared with a scarred man in a black trenchcoat who yelled at the whole room, "BE QUIET MAGGOTS!"

The Genin from all nations stilled at the commanding tone and he continued, "My name is Ibiki Morino; proctor for the first stage of the Chunin Exams."

* * *

Raiga was shuffled into the Exam room and placed next to one of Kabuto's teammates, a boy named Misumi Tsurugi and a random Ame Genin who was looking at Raiga menacingly. Apparently he did not like the fact that Raiga had an S-rank bounty for Ame.

Raiga looked over his test, knowing full well that it was actually bullshit. He informed both Karui and Omoi that the first stage of the Exam, if it was in test format, was an information gathering test. They were skeptic, but after seeing the paper and paying attention to the hidden meanings of the rules, they understood.

Raiga grinned and raised his hand, it was at the 20 minute marker, "Yo, scarface, I need to go to the bathroom."

If Ibiki didn't like his nickname he didn't let it show, instead he grunted over at a female Chunin stationed around the room. The woman got up and walked towards the door with a pair of handcuffs. Raiga got out of his seat, clapping Misumi on the back, to his annoyance, and followed the Chunin, who put the cuffs over his wrists and lead him to the restroom.

Naruto looked over at his possible cousin in confusion; how badly did he have to go?

Raiga returned to the room with a grin and waited for the Chunin guide, who was currently blushing quite strongly, to undo his cuffs. She did so, then hurried back to her position, furiously marking in her notes. Raiga clapped Misumi on the back once more and sat down, putting his feet on his desk and looking like he didn't have a care in the world.

Minutes passed by quickly, and while people were struggling with the test, Raiga was conversing with Chomei.

"I'm telling you, I should just kill him the moment he enters the forest.

Chomei shook his horned head, _**"No, you need to wait and spill blood when it is most Lucky."**_

"And when is that?"

" _ **When it is most Lucky!"**_

"You have absolutely no idea do you?"

"… _ **You ask so many Unlucky questions Rai-gaki."**_

"Right, I'm going to kill him the moment I see him in the Forest of Death."

" _ **It seems suspicious; Unlucky even. I deem you should be wary, such a foe wouldn't make the hunt easy."**_

Raiga grinned, "But what good is a hunt if there's no challenge in it?"

Chomei buzzed in thought, _**"It is preferable for a hunt to offer no challenge, it is Lucky; it means that one shall feed easily. But, you speak of prey not like an animal or even a Bijuu, but as a human. You desire conflict, in such a way that may risk my Seven Lucky Tails."**_

Raiga cocked his head to the side, "I'm just gunna kill a guy that everybody hates."

Chomei's buzzing became louder, _**"Hatred is a strong word for one such as he. Many dislike him, he is a betrayer, but to truly hate is Unlucky. I will give you my power during your hunt, but I hope you don't feel the need for it."**_

Chomei then kicked Raiga out of his mindscape, much to his annoyance. Chomei had a flare for dramatics, he enjoyed leaving their conversations on heavy notes so that Raiga would stew, only to come back to see Chomei completely forgot about what they spoke about.

He looked up and saw some Genin teams beginning to walk out of the room. Apparently while he was talking to Chomei he completely missed the announcement of the 45 minute mark and the whole "If you fail now you will never be able to become a Chunin" speech.

He watched, amused, as Naruto slammed his hand down and ranted to Ibiki about how there was no way he would give up and even if he did fail he'd just become the first Genin to become Hokage. He looked around and almost laughed at how many people were inspired by his ranting.

He had the disposition for leadership, just not the brains that normally came hand in hand with such a charismatic ability.

Ibiki smiled and the class that they had all passed, then after the Genin threw a tantrum he took off his bandana and explained how we, as Chunin, need to be willing to cheat to get where we want, and if we get caught we have to suffer the consequences.

As he was finishing up his speech a window broke and from it came a black blob of cloth that was spread out with kunai. The cloth read "Presenting the Sexy and Single Anko Mitarashi" and Raiga just thought it was over the top.

She looked over the room and started ranting to Ibiki, "What the hell Ibiki, why'd you leave so many? What are there…" She did a quick headcount, "28 teams? You're getting soft."

Ibiki shrugged, "We had a good group this time around."

She grinned sadistically, "Well it looks like I'll have to knock 'em down. By the time you're done with my test there'll be less than half of you remaining." The Genin squawked and protested but Raiga just nodded in boredom.

* * *

They found themselves at the entrance to the training ground nicknamed the Forest of Death 15 minutes later. Anko began to explain the Genin how the test would work, pointing out both the Heaven and Earth scrolls respectively. She then told the Genin to line up and sign their life waivers so Konoha wouldn't be held responsible for possible deaths.

Raiga signed for his group and was given a Heaven Scroll that he immediately put in one of his personal storage scrolls before heading outside, to the administrator that handed the scroll to Raiga's approval.

The Kumogakure team found themselves in front of a gate label "Number 34" and Raiga began to speak, "So here's my thought."

Karui and Omoi both looked at him, "I'm a tank, and you are a duo. We trained for a week on teamwork, but I think we should split up. You two together and me on my own." Karui was protesting but Omoi grabbed her shoulder and shook his head, "It makes sense Karui. If he doesn't we might mess up our teamwork, and then we could die, and then the Nanabi could get out and we could be blamed and war might happen and the Raikage would be mad and-"

He was punched in the head.

"Shadap!" Karui groaned, "Fine, FINE! We'll do it your way, how'll we find you?"

Raiga grinned, going through one of the pocket to his vest and pull out 2 sheets of paper with a circle on them, "These seals were made in a set of 3, one for each of you and one for me. If you channel Chakra into the seal then a portion of the circle will light up." He handed one to Omoi and demonstrated by putting some Chakra into the paper.

The circle immediately turned blue in Omois direction, and as Omoi moved the blue light followed.

Raiga nodded in a self-satisfied manner and gave the other seal to Karui, "If you need to find me or vice versa just use that."

Karui took the seal with a huff and placed it under her bandana, an article of clothing she would most likely not take off until this phase of the exam was done. Though she didn't like to admit it, Raiga was useful. His power was enough to beat Yugito-sama, one of Kumo's S-rankers, and his skill in Fuinjutsu was so versatile that she felt insignificant sometimes.

She shook her head, getting such pessimistic thoughts out of mind; they were in an Exam and he was just a pervert that corrupted her best friend.

She was startled out of her thought as the proctor, Anko, made one final announcement, "The Exam will be beginning on my mark!"

Karui and Omoi got into combat position and Raiga looked relaxed. Time ticked by slowly and the gates opened with one last saying from Anko.

"And one last bit of advice…

Just don't die!"

The Second phase of the Chunin Exams had officially begun.

* * *

 **Whew, so that was pretty fun to write. I finally got to add some of my brand humor into the story, before i'd only been able to put in small pieces of it in. So, Raiga was now in Konoha, and he already changed some things. Gaara didn't call Sasuke out this time since Raiga distracted him, and Naruto finally gained some spotlight.**

 **Raiga is a being a troll and I love it. Trolls in Fanfiction are rare, and I feel that Raiga is in a perfect position to just let it all out without many consequences.**

 **Next Chapter will be the Forest of Death. If you liked this update make sure to Favorite/Follow and don't forget to Review!**


	8. Forest of Death

Immediately after separating with Karui and Omoi Raiga began to follow a Chakra signature he had previously marked. He held the ability, with the use of Chakra based Fuinjutsu, to mark people and track said marks.

An hour into his hunt he had caught up to his prey.

Misumi Tsurugi

He had tagged Misumi Tsurugi during the first stage of the Chunin Exams, when he left and returned from the restroom. Each clap on his shoulders brought Raiga closer to his goal.

Kabuto Yakushi.

Dear lord Raiga hated that man. He was a betrayer, held no true allegiance to anyone, and above all else…

Totally, completely and without fail ruined the franchise for Robert.

Who the hell- well it makes sense- but seriously?! Reviving the Akatsuki with the Edo Tensei to be fodder?

Kabuto immediately went to his shitlist. Plus, he essentially only had abilities he copied from Orochimaru and the man's subordinates. That was after Orochimaru was dead.

This current Kabuto did not have such abilities. All he had going for him were speed, which Raiga _knew_ he could beat, spies, which did not help him in combat, and Iryoninjutsu.

Suffice to say, nobody aside from Hidan would be able to heal from decapitation.

Raiga snapped out of his thoughts and formed a cross-seal; summoning a total of 12 Kage Bunshin and at once all 13 of them all put their hands into the Tiger seal for a Kinjutsu that Raiga had only learned in his last week at Kumogakure.

Their bodies began to shimmer and slowly but surely they went out of view; leaving only a blanketed silhouette reflecting light off of their forms. Any odor they had prior to performing the Jutsu left their persons and their shadows were no longer seen below their feet or anywhere else on their body.

The Meisaigakure no Jutsu.

An A-rank supplementary Jutsu that is generally used for escape by allowing the user to control how light is reflected around their body with Chakra inflections. The technique also erases the user's scent and shadow, and is usable on any terrain, making it ideal not only for covert maneuvers but also offensive strikes.

The technique may have been difficult to see but anybody with decent sensory skills could find the user depending on how much Chakra they had and how much they put into the Jutsu. That and Raiga had learned the Jutsu in less than a week; it wasn't perfected like his other Kinjutsu were.

At least that would have been how it was if Raiga didn't happen to have a way to bypass the sensory issue.

All 13 invisible forms of Raiga begun to go through the handseals of Ox, then Snake and ending on Ram.

They all took a deep breath, and exhaled a mass of mist that, combined with Raiga's massive reserves, covered half a miles worth of land.

Kirigakure no Jutsu.

Both the Meisaigakure no Jutsu and Kirigakure no Jutsu separately were great for escape and assassinations. However, when used in tandem as Raiga figured out, it turned into an S-rank supplementary Jutsu.

Musei Shi no Jutsu. Silent Death.

A technique that made it so anybody stuck inside of it would have no way of sensing the Meisaigakure no Jutsu, making assassination inside of its parameters roughly 5 times easier. It was a true assassination Jutsu, unlike the Chidori or Raikiri that was only called such due to its piercing capabilities.

Normally, it would be impossible to hold 2 separate formats of supplementary Jutsu at the same time in such a way, but due to Raiga's use of Kage Bunshin, as well as his large Chakra reserves, he was capable of doing so. The only problem was that Raiga was unable to hold the Musei Shi no Jutsu indefinitely like he could for Kirigakure no Jutsu and Meisaigakure no Jutsu separately.

Then again, he only learned the Meisaigakure no Jutsu recently, and made the Musei Shi no Jutsu in an experiment. He didn't have time to perfect it.

All 13 sightless forms of Raiga went into their left Kunai pouches and procured multiple Senbon.

They charged at the team of glasses wearers, all 13 forms of Raiga whispered in unison after throwing their Senbon needles and performing a series of handseals; Ox, Dog, Dragon, Rat, Dog, Boar, Snake, Tiger.

" _Senbon Kage Bunshin no Jutsu."_

* * *

Kabuto, along with his useless teammates Yoroi Akado and Misumi Tsurugi were trekking leisurely through the Forest of Death. He had already made plans to take a scroll from one of the other Oto nin that were in the exam to take their Heaven Scroll in compliments to his Earth.

He looked over his teammates, noting how similarly dressed they were with hidden disgust. Truthfully, he found the majority of the world to be disgusting, but the relationship his teammates held was one of romance. A sickening thought to the man that happily dissected friends and foes alike.

Kabuto did not truly believe in romance or the like; only procreation. Homosexuality went against that belief.

However, as he and his team made their way through the forest, a deep mist surrounded them. Kabuto himself wasn't the best, but he was a sensor, and after tapping into his abilities he immediately stilled.

The mist was so thick he couldn't pick out who, what or where the technique was cast from. Nor could he determine how far the mist spread.

"Position!" Kabuto barked, Yoroi and Misumi immediately listening. Akado grabbed a curved Kunai in his left hand while his right was coated in his personal Chakra absorbing technique whereas Misumi's arms dislocated and extended in a ready position. The 2 found themselves back to back with Kabuto, forming a triangle and a well-fortified position.

They waited with baited breath, but Kabuto's hunger for knowledge made him analyze who could create such a mist. The only technique known to do so was the Kirigakure no Jutsu, and no Genin from Kiri were in this year's Chunin Exams. In fact, Kiri was completely withdrawn from the world, and hadn't been to a Chunin Exam in nearly a decade.

He had meticulously gathered information on essentially any and all competitors in this Exam; all those that he felt would be worth noting. Those that he hadn't gathered information on were either completely unprepared for this Exam or were under his radar.

Nobody escaped his radar.

A flurry of sounds erupted from all sides of the purple clad trio, a swarm of Senbon, numbering in the thousands descended upon them. The trio found themselves immediately on the defensive, Yoroi forsook his Chakra absorbtion technique and grabbed a second curved Kunai whilst Misumi added a pair of standard Kunai to his extended arms and swerved them about to defend.

They tried, and tried hard, but the amount of Kunai matched with the fact that both Yoroi and Misumi were low Chunin level Shinobi meant they had no proper way to defend themselves from an A-rank offensive Ninjutsu.

Yoroi found himself dead when one of the Senbon split through his sunglasses and imbedded into his skull. Misumi, after having tens of Senbon stab into his body, opted to run. He made it roughly 5 feet before he found himself back where he was; Kabuto not in sight. The Senbon struck his dazed body from all angle and he collapsed next to his lover a corpse.

Kabuto, being a Jonin rank Shinobi, used the Kawarimi on Misumi and then attempted to make his escape, only to find a trio of Senbon taking their position in his left leg. He then performed a silent Doton: Dochu Senko to escape the rest of the Senbon onslaught by tunneling underground.

Kabuto, while underground, honed his senses in and attempted to find whoever did this. He was happily surprised that the person who did all this damage appeared to be right where the corpses of his useless teammates lay; most likely searching for the Earth Scroll.

Whoever this was had effectively made a fool out of Kabuto, and that would not do.

He swiftly and silently made his way over to the feet of the enemy in cried out _"Doton: Shinju Zanshu no Jutsu!"_

He grabbed the legs of his enemy and forced them underground whilst he made his way above ground simultaneously and stared at the intruder.

Raiga Uzumaki.

Oh, Kabuto was right to worry about this man. He had been able to escape his, Sasori's and Orochimaru's spies well. Raiga Uzumaki: Jinchuriki of the Nanabi, Taki no Dorobo and other unnecessary titles.

Kabuto would savor this.

"You know…" He began to heal his body, pulling out Senbon without so much as a flinch as Medical Chakra coated his wounds, "You're making this Exam difficult."

Raiga sneered, "I saw you two grab an Earth Scroll, I need that."

Kabuto nodded, seemingly indifferent though on the inside he was still raging, "Well, you killed my team. I suppose I'll have to return the favor."

Raiga smirked, "Too bad, me and my team split up. You said it yourself, you collect info. Kumo works in duos, not 3 man cells. I was just added on to an already coordinated duo for the Exams."

Kabuto smiled, a sinister one, and continued, "Ah, I guess I'll just have to torture you enough to take out 2 people instead. Us Iryo-nin are good at keeping you all alive so you can... _Savor_ the pain."

Raiga's eyes widened, and Kabuto took a perverse pleasure in watching him struggle. Finally, after Kabuto finished healing his body and pulled out a curved Kunai, his shoulders slumped, "Can I at least have some last words?"

Kabuto shrugged, "It's not like I'll care." He slowly lowered the Kunai until it was directly in front of Raiga's amber eye.

Raiga sighed, before his eyes sharpened and he grinned in a feral way, _"Bunshin Daibakuha."_

Kabuto blinked before his eyes widened and from the still thick mist numerous pairs of arms grabbed his body. He thrashed and raged at the simple subterfuge that he fell for and, as he was about to swipe at them all, a mass of Chakra exploded from the invisible bodies and the single buried body in front of him.

He was blasted skyward, his limbs not responding and he was covered in lacerations and burns. Bone was visible from his ribcage, to his arms and legs and many tendons turned from their natural pink to a scorched black. He fell down onto the hard earth and panted, blood escaping from his mouth as he threw up.

He glared, swerving his head around and not seeing Raiga anymore he began to use his In'yu Shometsu to heal and remake the various cells in his body that were destroyed. As he furiously applied his Chakra to the technique and kept a lookout, he never bothered to look up.

From above him, Raiga flew with his Chakra Wing, Twin-blades ready with Chakra Flow and as he released the wings to dive down he grinned.

Kabuto didn't hear nor sense anything as everything went black in an instant.

* * *

Raiga stared at the now decapitated head of Kabuto Yakushi and sneered.

He had wanted to do that since he was still in Taki.

He sealed the head in a Storage Scroll; it was great for annoying Orochimaru and his ilk.

Raiga began to go through the body, finding 2 peculiar things. 1 was a tattooed Storage Scroll over his heart that contained the Earth Scroll, which he put in the same Storage Scroll the Heaven Scroll was in, and the other was a tattoo over his left forearm.

A Summoning Tattoo.

He must have hidden it with Chakra when alive, because Raiga remembered Kabuto having to rely on Orochimaru's Summoning Tattoo. Still, this worked out well; if he could decipher it he could give Kumo a new combat Summoning Contract.

Maybe A-sama would stop being such a dick in exchange.

He motioned one of his Twin-swords, Raiton Chakra Flow surrounding the edge, and cut the limp arm off before putting it in a separate Storage Scroll from Kabuto's head. He intended to use that to psyche people out, but the arm was actually worth something.

Raiga pulled out his Tracking Seal that matched the pair he gave to Omoi and Karui and pumped Chakra into it. The Seal glowed blue towards the west, and so he extended his Chakra Wings and flew above the tree lines; towards his team.

* * *

Karui and Omoi were surprised with his arrival, but they shared grins when he mentioned already possessing an Earth Scroll. The team made their way towards the central tower quickly.

Raiga opted to created 30 Kage Bunshin while they were sprinting to the tower, and made 10 transform into Omoi whilst another 10 turned into Karui. Teams of 3 Kage Bunshin the split up, all going towards the tower from different directions.

He was glad he did that, he could feel his Kage Bunshin being killed as they fast-approached the tower.

They made it to the tower within 30 minutes.

Upon entering the building Raiga removed the clean Heaven Scroll and bloody Earth Scroll from confinement and opened them in front of the stone dais.

A plume of smoke erupted and Samui took place in front of them, "Cool, you're early." She nodded.

Raiga grinned, Karui howled and raised a fist in the air and Omoi began to mutter under his breath.

Samui nodded, "How'd this phase go? Was it cool?"

Karui grumbled, "Raiga did all the work. He told us to split up and like, an hour or so later he comes back with an Earth Scroll."

Samui raised an eyebrow and turned her attention to Raiga, "Who'd you fight?"

Raiga shrugged, "That Kabuto guy from before the First Exam that had all the nin-info cards. He seemed dangerous, so I tagged his teammate during the written test and followed the trail in the forest."

Karui blinked while Omoi nodded, "He knew about Raiga. Nobody knows about Raiga. He had to have been some kind of super spy bent on taking over the world using a mass illusion… Oh! Maybe he was going to start a war with the undead; he seemed the type."

Karui, Samui and Raiga all stared at Omoi. Karui, because this was even more convoluted than the shit he would normally spout. Samui, because she just now realized how uncool Omoi really was. Raiga because…

Well, Omoi was spot on and that was a rarity.

Samui shrugged her shoulders, effectively ignoring Omoi's outburst, "Right, so you 3 pass. I was supposed to go over some uncool spiel about Heaven and Earth, but that's a Konoha thing." She motioned for the trio to follow and headed inside the tower.

They found rooms easily enough, it turns out that they were the 2nd team, to enter, and the 2nd team to break the previous record of 4 hours. The sand siblings were first, making it through the Forest of Death in an hour and 37 minutes. Raiga's team made it in an hour and 43 minutes.

Raiga pouted all the way over to Gaara, who had his eyes closed and was leaning on a wall, "You beat me."

Gaara opened his dull teal eyes and spoke in monotone, "And you lost the challenge."

Raiga blinked, "Oh, the blood! Yeah, that's probably more your style. Shukaku lets you control sand right?" Gaara nodded, "Right, you just crush people to dead. Me? I didn't get to do that, but I did decapitate my enemy; I have his head in a Storage Scroll."

Gaara began to grin; he was really liking this Kumo-nin, "Uzumaki… Mother wants your blood!" Sand began to swirl out of his gourd.

Raiga didn't bother moving his body save for his hand into a stop motion, "Gaara, we made a deal. We can sacrifice each other's blood to our mutual demons after we kill our targets. I get the blondie you get the duckbutt." Gaara scowled but silently relented; his sand returning to his gourd.

Raiga nodded, "Anyways, I was actually hoping to talk to you; or more specifically your mother."

Gaara's body straightened, "…You can speak to mother?" He sounded hopeful for reasons unknown.

Raiga nodded, "All Jinchuriki hold the ability to converse with another's Bijuu, so long as the Bijuu and Host are in mutual agreement on this."

Gaara cocked his head to the side, "How does one go about doing so?" He may have been psychotic, but this was information from the Nanabi Jinchuriki about Jinchuriki in general.

He wouldn't pass up information. He'd just murder the informant after getting what he wanted.

Raiga grinned, "Great! So, first thing you do is sit down." Gaara complied simply enough and Raiga followed suit, "Next you hold out your fist, and I need skin contact so no Suna no Yoroi." Gaara looked honestly surprised at the mention of his armor, but held out his fist and willed the sand to surround his arm instead.

Raiga copied the motion with his fist and bumped with Gaara.

The world around them shattered.

* * *

Raiga found himself in a blank, dull tan room lit with a full moon in the background. Spikes surrounded a small pillar and atop the pillar lay Shukaku, shackled down to the floor by his tail and arms.

Shukaka was as menacing as he seemed and upon seeing Raiga in his abode began to scream, _**"SACRIFICE! YOU COME BEFORE SHUKAKU TO BE EATEN YES? YES, YES, YES! HAHAHAHAHA! C'MERE AND LEMME EAT YA."**_

" _ **I'm afraid you can't eat my host Shukaku, it would be Unwise and, more importantly, Unlucky."**_ Came Chomei from the background. He wasn't bound by a seal when inside Gaara's mindscape, primarily due to the fact that he was incapable of harming Raiga when not inside his own seal. Raiga found himself atop Chomeis head the moment he heard the bug speak.

" _ **Chomei? CHOMEI! ARE YOU FREEING ME?! I PROMISE TO SHARE MY LUNCH WITH YOU IF YOU DO~~~~~"**_

Chomei let loose a guttural sounding sigh, _**"Shukaku, be silent."**_

" _ **WELL WHADDAYA WANT IF IT AIN'T TO BUST ME OUT?! I'LL RIP OUT YOUR WINGS AND SET THEM ON MATATABI'S BODY! YOU WILL BURN! BAHAHAHAAAAAAA~~~"**_

Raiga stared at Shukaku for a moment before he started to cackle. He couldn't help it, the Bijuu was exactly as he expected.

He was insane.

" _ **WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING NINGEN?! SHUKAKU-SAMA DID NOT GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO LAUGH! STOP!"**_

Raiga kept on laughing, even Chomei was buzzing around in his manner of a laugh.

" _ **I SAID STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP!"**_ Shukaku was whining.

 _Whining._

Raiga wiped a tear away from his eye; Shukaku was hilarious. "Right, we're actually here for a reason."

" _ **TELL ME THEN LEAVE, NO LUNCH FOR YOU!"**_

" _ **A group of Ningens got their hands on the Gedo Mazo and plan to seal us."**_ Chomei answered for Raiga. Shukaku would likely never take the words of a human to heart, but his fellow Bijuu?

" _ **NNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! IF THEY DO THAT THEN NOBODY GETS ANYMORE LUNCH! MY FOOD! MY FUNKY MUSIC! MY SLAUGHTER! TELL ME WHO THESE NINGEN ARE AND I'LL KILL THE AAAAAAAALLLLLL!"**_

And so they did. They explained what the Akatsuki was to Shukaku and informed him of their members. He was unamused when he learned that 4 of their members were capable of controlling a Bijuu; Itachi, Obito, Zetsu and Nagato.

It was a simple endeavor from both Chomei and Raiga to opt to not inform the Bijuu about the Manga. Suffice to say they did not believe that would go well with the already insane Shukaku.

They went on to explain that when Gaara calmed down, it was in his best interest to at the very least let the guy sleep for a few hours without worry of losing control of Shukaku.

Shukaku was not a fan of that, but agreed to do so the next time Gaara visited the seal. The troublesome thing was that Gaara hadn't been inside the seal since he was a child, and firmly believed in his insanity that Shukaku was his mother.

Raiga left the seal soon enough, only to find himself and Gaara surrounded by Temari, Kankuro and Baki. The children looked fearful while Baki looked livid, "What… are you _doing?_ "

Raiga blinked, "Talkin' to Shukaku." He then got up, dusted his pants off, thanked the glassy eyed Gaara and headed back to his team. He never noticed the Jonin pale nor did he see Temari and Kankuro.

* * *

It had been 5 days since Raiga, Omoi and Karui finished with the 2nd phase of the Exams, and they were finally going to begin the 3rd phase.

Or at least they _were_.

Raiga completely forgot that there were preliminaries. His memory of the Exams had been very selective since he only cared about Gaara, Kabuto and Orochimaru.

He watched as the shitflinger went on to explain the reason for the Exams in the first place as a war deterrent and watched how Konoha-nin all paled at the thought.

It was pretty funny that they didn't even know about this stuff.

He then allowed the 3rd Phases proctor, Hayate Gekko, to explain that, no, they would not be going directly to the 3rd portion and, yes, there would be a preliminary round.

Much shouting occurred.

Raiga ignored it all and pulled out his Icha Icha book; content to read his way through the preliminaries.

As he read he heard Karui cackle and Omoi choke on his lollipop. So, being naturally curious Raiga looked up.

 _Round 1: Raiga Uzumaki v Omoi_

Raiga joined Karui in her cackling.

* * *

 **Hey there y'all, Umodin back with another update. I'm not going to be as frequent as I am normally in the next 2 weeks; finals man. SO! let's break this down a bit. I finally informed you all who Raiga wanted to kill and then did the deed. I know it wasn't as drawn out as you and I may have liked, but they're Shinobi. I'm under the impression they want to have nice, speedy kills. Kabuto was barely A-rank in my opinion prior to the 4th war; so I didn't let him have his moment.**

 **Shukaku was a little tricky, mainly because I wanted him to be violently insane, but i've actually met an insane person before and the anime/manga depiction is only partially right. The insane tend to have an obsession with something, and if they can't get what they want will act aggressive in retalliation. I made Shukaku's vice food. He's been sealed 3 times now and has not had food since he's been outside. So he takes it out on his hosts.**

 **Next chapter is gunna be fun, Raiga v Omoi was literally a random hat drop. I put all the competitor names in a randomized caller and the first thing that came out was that fight.**

 **If you liked this chapter Favorite/Follow and don't forget to Review!**


	9. Raiga v Omoi

Naruto, along with the rest of the Genin aside from Kumogakure's Omoi and Raiga Uzumaki, made his way up to the stands. He made a beeline to Kakashi-sensei, intent to ask some questions.

"Kakashi-sensei!"

Kakashi looked up from his book briefly to give one of his patented eye-smiles towards his cute little Genin, "Hello Naruto. The 2nd phase wasn't too bad was it?" Oh, he was aware it was a clusterfuck, what with Orochimaru having marked Sasuke and all, but it was always good to keep Naruto talking about things that didn't involve ramen or the color orange.

Naruto nodded along, "Uhuh! We made it easy!" Kakashi knew that was a lie, if they did have an easy time they wouldn't have barely made it on the last allowable day, "But I wanna ask you a question Sensei."

Kakashi quirked an eyebrow and returned his gaze to his book, "Sure."

"What's a Jinchuriki?"

He naturally choked on nothing, dropped his book, an action that awed Naruto, and met Naruto's gaze full force, "Where did you hear that term?"

Naruto scratched the back of his head, "Well, before the written test, there was this guy, Kabuto, that was giving out info on the other teams. That guy who's about to fight, Raiga, snuck up on Kabuto when he heard his name. 'said Kabuto wasn't telling them everything, and told him to tell us what a Jinchuriki was."

Kakashi narrowed his single eye and looked to the redhead in the arena. Oh, he knew about the boy being an Uzumaki; the traits were far too distinctive. But for him to be a Jinchuriki like Naruto?

It was almost suspicious.

Kakashi straighted when he saw his fellow Konoha Jonin and their respective Genin teams looking curious. Well, the Genin were, the Jonin all had narrowed eyes trained onto the redhead.

He let out a sigh before turning his attention onto Naruto, "Jinchuriki is a term that means "The Power of Human Sacrifice" and refers to a human being who hosts one of the 9 Bijuu inside of their body."

Naruto looked confused but Sakura gave out a horrified gasp, while the other Genin all squeaked and sputtered, "What a Bijuu?"

Kakashi was about to answer, but the Kumogakure Jonin, Samui, took over, "Uncool… Bijuu are the tailed beasts. Konoha knows all about the Kyuubi, right?"

Naruto got it then, and he abruptly paled at the mention of his tenant. He swerved a gaze to Raiga with such intensity that it countered his usual happy go lucky personality.

Karui took over, "Kumo's proud of our Jinchuriki! Our sensei, Bee, is the Hachibi Jinchuriki and the 3rd person in the world to completely control a Bijuu!" She was quite proud of her sensei, but that also was because an S-rank Shinobi chose to be hers and Omoi's Sensei.

All of the Konoha Genin looked very scared at the thought of a human being capable of controlling a monster like that. The Suna Genin looked very intrigued, Gaara moreso than any at the mention of controlling a Bijuu, whereas the Otogakure Jonin, Orochimaru in disguise, looked to Raiga with untold desire.

The whole of the room stared down at the arena with anticipation.

* * *

Omoi stared at Raiga hard, "Can I forfeit?"

Raiga shrugged, his face buried inside his book, "You can, but both A-sama and B-shishou will know and then…"

Omoi shuddered and began to rapidly think up numerous scenarios that all led to pain.

Raiga shrugged, "Tell you what, we'll do this like training. One skill at a time from Kenjutsu, Genjutsu, Ninjutsu, Taijutsu and so on."

Omoi let out a breath, and darted back away from Raiga, unsheathing his Katana at the same time.

Hayate looked over the 2 Kumogakure Genin, "Ready?"

They nodded, "The first match starts NOW!" he then shunshinned away.

Omoi charged at Raiga with a battle cry, his Katana slowly forming a Raiton Chakra Flow.

Raiga did not move much, aside from his left hand grabbing a Senbon from his Kunai pouch and holding it out, "Alright, 1st lesson: Kenjutsu." The Senbon was immediately surrounded by such a thick Raiton Chakra Flow that the large needle couldn't be seen inside the current of lightning.

Katana found Senbon and Omoi began to strike with a flurry while Raiga was merely blocking with one hand and reading Icha Icha with the other.

* * *

Team 7 saw what was happening and they couldn't believe it. They knew that Raiga guy acted like their Sensei, but now he was treating the Chunin Exams like their own Genin test.

It was disturbing how similar they were.

Kakashi was looking at Raiga with muted incredulity. Nobody should act so similar to another person!

He didn't want to be like Gai and Lee!

* * *

Omoi let out a scream of frustration as he noted furiously that he had not gotten past Raiga once in the full minute he'd slashed at him. Raiga did this kind of training for both him and Karui, and it really helped their teamwork against stronger opponents. But when it was just him against Raiga?

There was a reason he wanted to forfeit.

Omoi abruptly quit his assault and darted back, handseals forming fluidly and ending on Bear as he exclaimed his strongest technique, _"Ranton: Raza!"_ A singular beam of bright blue light escaped Omoi's hands and sped towards Raiga quickly.

Raiga looked up from his book momentarily with surprise, "Huh, looks like we're on our 2nd lesson: Kekkei Genkai."

The beam hit Raiga directly in the chest and an explosion of blue surrounded his form; smoke billowing out of the blast radius.

* * *

The people in the stands looked at the fight incredulously. Raiga had been easily dominating, but Omoi's surprise use of Ranton got to them. Karui herself was fuming, she had always been annoyed that Omoi was the only one that inherited the Ranton from their grandfather.

Naruto looked at his now dead possible cousin sadly. He had been extremely curious about the Uzumaki and now he'd never get the chance.

At least that was until Sakura let out a gasp and he looked to the arena. From the smoke came Raiga, looking perfectly fine, with a pair of teal wings sprouting from his back; one of the 2 was singed.

Orochimaru just looked at the field with a frothing mouth. Ranton _and_ an unknown?

* * *

Omoi gawked, gasped then groaned. He always, _always_ forgot about the Chakra Wings. It wasn't even his fault! Raiga very rarely used them in the field or training, claiming they were meant for surprises more than anything else.

Raiga smirked lightly before returning his attention to his book. The Chakra Wings shrunk and surrounded his torso before shimmering out of existence.

Omoi went through another set of handseals, ending on the Tiger, before he removed his left hand from the seal and brought it to his mouth.

He whistled.

Raiga blinked before he abruptly yelped and dropped his book as if it were lava, glaring at Omoi hatefully.

"You…"

Chakra began to spike around Raiga as he removed his hoodie, showing off his tattooed arms. The Chakra concentrated at them and the tattoos began to glow indigo.

"YOU…"

He smashed his fist down to the arena floor, the floor collapsing with the brunt force. Cracks formed around the pavement and much of the stonework went flying around his body. Dust spread out heavily and the force made his own hitai-ate fly off of his head. In the middle of his forehead was an indigo diamond: a Yin Seal.

"YOU USE GENJUTSU TO TURN MY ICHA ICHA INTO YAOI!"

He let loose one more roar, his Chakra Wings materialized and he slowly floated; dust circling him.

"LAST LESSON: TAIJUTSU!"

Omoi pissed his pants.

* * *

The whole of the room gawked. They knew Raiga was strong but… What?

Tenten looked at him hard before she did something she had never done in all of her Kunoichi career.

She squealed.

"He's like Tsunade-sama!"

Karui just cackled.

Kakashi was looking at Raiga with companionship. Such desecration of the glories that is Icha Icha deserved retribution.

Orochimaru began to look at the Uzumaki with slight trepidation.

He did not want to risk being hit with strength comparable to his old teammate.

Hiruzen stared at the Kumogakure Uzumaki with a slack jaw. He had that strength? A YIN SEAL?!

Truly this lad deserved his title of Dorobo. Still, it was a Fuinjutsu variation of the strength, so he couldn't claim it was stolen. It must have taken years for him to create such a formula.

* * *

Raiga's body disappeared in a flurry of speed.

Omoi couldn't track him, though he wished he could. This strength was something he'd never known he'd been capable of, but it made sense now how he beat Yugito-sama.

Raiga appeared crouching behind Omoi in a split second, his fingers pressed firmly together into a Tiger seal and his face was contorted in fury.

" _Kumogakure Hijutsu: Sennen Gorushi!"_

He pressed his fingers inside Omoi's rectum and his newest bitch let out a loud scream.

Normally, Sennen Goroshi would send a Chakra enhanced poke to the asshole, forcing the person that was hit with it to fly forwards.

Sennen Gor _u_ shi, however, was a Chakra enhanced poke in combination with Fuinjutsu based strength enhancement that caused the person who was subject to it to _rocket_ forwards.

Omoi, not even a second after he screamed, was buried halfway into the wall.

Raiga nodded; his Icha Icha was avenged. His tattoo's stopped glowing and his Chakra Wings dissipated. He walked over to where he was originally standing and grabbed his hoodie, put it on, snatched his book, then grabbed his hitai-ate.

Hayate shunshinned back while Raiga was putting the headband on and coughed, "The winner is Raiga Uzumaki. MEDIC!"

* * *

Naruto stared at his possible cousin and did one thing.

He shivered.

He was the only person in this room that was subjected to the "poke of doom" and now there was another user of the evil technique.

Karui was cackling even harder, using the rail to hold herself from rolling on the floor.

Samui was most definitely entertained, but the way Raiga entertained her… "Not cool."

Kakashi stared at Raiga with something he had never felt once in his life.

Paternal pride.

Oh sure, he had absolutely no relation to this person, in fact he had never spoken a word to Raiga- but still!

* * *

Raiga made his way up to the stands while the medics attempted to pry Omoi out of the wall.

Karui immediately latched onto him and thanked him over and over as she laughed.

He noticed near instantly the whole room was looking at him with interest, to fear, to… lust?

Tenten had strange tastes.

The screen began to go through names once more.

 _Zaku Abumi_

 _V_

 _Sasuke Uchiha_

"FORFEIT!" came the shrill call of Zaku.

Raiga just then remembered that Sasuke was responsible for breaking his arms in the first place.

He shrugged, aside from his fight he didn't particularly care for the others. He turned to Samui, "I'm gunna use the loo." She nodded and he made his way out the nearby door.

* * *

An hour later Samui barged into the bathroom and dragged him out by his hood, informing him that the fights were over with and his presence was needed.

Upon his return he noticed something off about his teammates. Omoi was shifting as far as he could from Raiga while Karui was seething and glaring hatefully over at Shino Aburame.

Hiruzen cleared his throat, "Anko, the 2nd stage proctor, will be giving out your numbers for the 3rd phases fight. Please take a number from the box she passes around and inform Hayate of what it will be."

Raiga was first to go and he grabbed the number 7, "Lucky!"

He didn't care about the rest of them, he was just stoked that he got number 7.

Hayate coughed, catching Raiga's attention once more, and pointed at the board, "We have our fights."

Naruto Uzumaki v Neji Hyuga

Shino Aburame v Kankuro

Temari v Shikamaru Nara

Raiga Uzumaki v Dosu Kinuta

Sasuke Uchiha v Gaara

Raiga blinked. Didn't Dosu die?

Well, at least he'd have more time to read his Icha Icha. Omoi may have tainted one of his books, but he still had the rest of the series.

The Shitflinger then explained some details that Raiga didn't need, as well as giving a full month off till the finals and then dismissed the group.

Raiga, along with Karui and Omoi, followed Samui out of the building. She turned to him and started with the important questions, "What are you going to do for your training?"

Raiga grinned, "Katsuyu's gunna train me for the month."

She nodded, it was an honor to be trained personally by the boss of a Summong Contract.

He bit his thumb, performed the handseals and muttered out a "Kuchiyose no Jutsu."

Katsuyu appeared in her smaller form and stared up at Raiga, **"Yes Raiga-sama?"**

"I'd like to take up your invitation to train." He did not intend to inform his teammates that he was going to learn Senjutsu. Barely anybody knew that it existed, and even then it had a very large change to backfire.

Katsuyu bobbed her antenna up and down, **"Of course Raiga-sama, I'll summon you immediately."**

She disappeared in a plume of smoke.

Raiga looked over his temporary team with a grin and saluted them, "See ya!"

He too disappeared in a plume of smoke.

* * *

Shikkotsu Forest was an exotic placed, Raiga noted. The place was filled with tree's that seemed to be made of bone- as if Kimimaro died here a thousand times. He looked around with a grin and found himself infront of the full form of Katsuyu.

She was twice as large as her boss summon form.

As it turned out, Katsuyu was incapable of being fully summoned by anybody but a Senjutsu user due to her own body being too dangerous to heal others that weren't able to use Senjutsu.

" **Welcome Raiga-sama. It has been many years since I have had guests."**

She spat a small scroll at his feet, **"You must sign this before we begin; in blood."**

Raiga shrugged and signed it. Katsuyu was a kind being, she had never steered him wrong.

" **Before you begin, I feel you need to hear of my history."**

" **I was born on the same day the Juubi was defeated."** Raiga gasped, and Chomei buzzed loudly inside his seal, **"The excess Chakra from its body is what created the Summoning Clans. However, I was the only Slug to ever gain access to Chakra. I had no mate, no way to create a Clan like the Toads or Snakes, and so I brooded.**

 **That was until I found out about the Rokubi, Saiken."**

Raiga blinked. She knew the Rokubi?

" **He was a slug, like me, that had no mate. At the time, I felt we were meant for each other. I approached him, and he told me something.**

 **He told me he would take me as a mate, should I be able to defeat one of the Bijuu in combat."**

She shuffled lightly, her head coming down to Raiga's form as she spoke, **"Naturally, that was impossible. I was but a drop of water in the ocean of power that were the Bijuu. But, I never gave up. I** _ **wanted**_ **a proper mate, and after years I found the Toads had created something called a Summoning Contract.**

" **I, in my state of desire, stole one of their unfinished contracts and altered it for my own body instead of their amphibian forms. I made multiple contracts, over a hundred, and scattered them."**

Raiga had at this point sat down; Katsuyu very rarely spoke about herself. It was interesting to find out why she was a general pacifist.

" **By that point I, along with the Toad and Snake chiefs, discovered Senjutsu. With it, I was able to turn my summoners into stone slugs, then I absorbed the Senjutsu from their bodies and new slugs were born. I absorbed them. Over time my body, which was originally the size of your palm, grew to be what you see before you.**

 **I thought I was ready."**

Raiga gulped, "Ready for what?"

" **To take up Saikens challenge.**

 **I had challenged the Ichibi, Shukaku, to mortal combat."**

Chomei buzzed animatedly in the seals while Raiga gawked.

" **We met here, away from his desert and my cave, and battled. I had been losing, so I used my natural ability to absorb Chakra on Shukaku. I learned something that day.**

 **Shukaku's markings are in actuality the very first form of Juinjutsu: Cursed Seals."**

Raiga hissed, he hated Juinjutsu. Not because he couldn't do it, just that it mainly involved enslavement.

Katsuyu nodded, **"You understand it seems. Shukaku's curse flowed into me and the forest that I was using for my Senjutsu, turning my naturally teal body and the green forest a pale white with only parts of what my originally teal skin looked like remaining.**

 **He left immediately, claiming I tasted like bad food; whatever that meant. As I attempted to chase after him I found I couldn't leave this forest anymore. I had been bound to this land."**

Katsuyu's form rippled lightly as she continued, **"However, I had been given time to think over what I had done, and I knew that I had become something that Saiken would have no interest in. I had absorbed the Chakra of over one thousand humans all in the name of power. And even then, I was defeated by his youngest, weakest brother.**

 **I decided that I would no longer trick my Summoners, and instead give them the option."**

Her body expanded and her mouth opened wider than Raiga had ever seen. He looked around, and saw hundreds of small slugs holding him in place and he began to panic.

" **But, you have signed the second contract, the one I just gave you, stating you would try to learn Senjutsu. Slug Senjutsu has a dark history.**

 **The Toads make their Summoners emulate them by standing perfectly still; making Toad Senjutsu users extremely peaceful. The Snakes inject Senjutsu into their Summoners like venom, making Snake Senjutsu users generally vicious.**

 **Slug Senjutsu involved me taking you into my body. I then secrete Senjutsu into your pores; all of them. Should you fail, you would turn to stone, and I would absorb you into my body. Should you succeed…"**

She pounced. Raiga was swallowed whole, along with the patch of dirt he was sitting on.

" **Well, none have ever succeeded."**

* * *

 **Hey there guys, Umodin back once more for a Plot Thief update. So, Omoi v Raiga. That was fun to write, also a little tricky. It was my first fight scene that wasn't an assassination like it was for Kabuto.**

 **I finally got around to showing what Raiga's tats were, but i'll explain them in more detail. Tsunade's strength comes from her time her chakra to pulse the moment she punches with the full brunt of her Chakra. She has done this so well that it's instinctual. Raiga's Fuinjutsu varient leeches Chomei's Chakra into the tattoos and makes it so they are continuously channeling Chakra the same way Tsunade does. So while Tsunade's is conceivable and smart, his is an extreme Chakra waster, but for a Jinchuriki it works.**

 **Sennen Gorushi translates to One Thousand Years of Pain.**

 **Katsuyu... I personally find Katsuyu to be far too pacifistic. So I gave her a bloodied past that involves the Bijuu. The Slug contract was never expanded upon in the Manga/Anime, so I put my own little twist on it. Hopefully it worked out.**

 **Next chapter will be the 3rd round of the Chunin Exams.**

 **If you liked this, don't forget to Favorite/Follow and give me a Review!**


	10. Raiton no Yoroi

Gaara stared impassively from his position in the Arena. His sister Temari was on his left whilst his brother Kankuro, the coward, was as far away from the 2 as possible.

Gaara looked at his competition with only the slightest bit of interest. He remember the names, they would be food for his Mother.

Shino Aburame, a user of insects; they would all be crushed. Shikamaru Nara, a user of shadows; he would die before he could even form a Rat seal. Neji Hyuga, Taijutsu prodigy; he would die instantly – Gaara learned his lesson when fighting Rock Lee about disregarding Taijutsu. Naruto Uzumaki, a clone user; not even worth sacrificing to Mother.

He impassively though of the missing members of the group. Dosu Kinuta, a sound user; he had been used to feed Mother 3 nights ago. Sasuke Uchiha, unknown fighting style; his own opponent – he had better show up, else once the Invasion began Gaara would not hesitate to allow Mother to hunt down the Genin.

Raiga Uzumaki, a fellow Jinchuriki, Raiton user, Fuinjutsu prodigy and apparent pervert.

Gaara was unsure how he would deal with that.

Mother claimed that she didn't want Raiga's blood, but she did want to hurt him. Yet, how could Gaara hurt somebody without spilling their blood?

It was a conundrum he had yet to figure out.

* * *

Hiruzen, along with Rasa who had arrived minutes earlier, stared at the arena. He had been looking forward to this year's exam, mainly because his pseudo-grandson would be participating.

It was always nice to watch children attempt to kill each other.

His musing was cut off by the hoarse shout of "OI SHITFLINGER!"

He turned to his left to see A, the Yondaime Raikage making his way over with his infamous brother Killer B on his right and Ranton no Darui on his left.

Clearly he didn't believe in overkill.

Hiruzen coughed out a snicker at his favorite nickname, "Greetings A, what kept you?"

A grunted and plopped down into his designated seat, his guards going to his sides, "We were trying to find Raiga. Lil' shit hasn't been seen since the preliminaries according to his team."

Hiruzen paused, taking a puff from his pipe, "Did they know where he went?"

A shrugged, it wasn't a big secret and Raiga – if he showed up – would let the world know anyways, "He was given permission from his Summons to train with them."

"He has a Contract?"

"Slugs."

Hiruzen choked on his pipe, "Ex- Excuse me?"

Rasa was also curious, "I thought only Tsunade-hime and her apprentice were Slug Summoners."

A grunted, "He's called Dorobo for a reason. When the Senju was passed out drunk he snatched the scroll and signed his name. Tsunade may have been the head Summoner, but Katsuyu had the final say and she liked him." That was the story they came up with to explain his use of Slugs. Raiga didn't want anybody to know his relationship with Tsunade and A wanted people to fear his Shinobi more.

It was a win-win.

Hiruzen drummed his fingers on his armrest, "Perhaps he needs an added bounty from Konoha?"

A offered a shrug, "Do what you want. He considers his bounties trophies."

Hiruzen nodded, "On the topic of Raiga, he seemed a peculiar boy during the exam. Did you know he seems to take after Jiraiya?"

A blinked, not exactly sure how to respond, before he grinding his teeth, "Lil' shit got the books didn't he? Our Daimyo made them illegal since Jiraiya tried to sleep with his daughter before she was of age."

He let out a huff before turning to Hiruzen fully, "You know why I brought a team here."

Hiruzen nodded, it seemed A was serious about wanting to give peace talks a second try, "We will speak of such things after the Finals, but yes, we will speak."

A nodded, placated for now and looked towards the arena, more specifically at Neji, "Hyuga, huh?"

"Yes, that is the son of the body that was sent to you."

A did not wince, but he did soften his naturally hard gaze lightly, "Ah…"

He was cut off when a plume of smoke the size of a small house erupted from the Arena. Him, Hiruzen and Rasa all jerked in attention.

When the smoke cleared A palmed his face to hide his embarrassment.

* * *

The smoke cleared to show one of the larger forms of Katsuyu, roughly the size of a horse, wiggling around happily.

Atop her head was Raiga Uzumaki, dressed in his standard gear with the addition of a white and blue haori. He had one foot on her head while the other was dangling in midair and he was dancing kabuki style.

"From the Great Tree of Taki, to the Mountains of Kumo and the Shikkotsu Forest! Women swoon and desire him, Men hate and envy him. He is the Dorobo! He is the Namekuji Sennin!

He is Raiga Uzumaki!"

Katsuyu chose that time to speak, **"Now that my Sage has stopped acting the fool, I must depart. Enjoy the Exam Raiga-sama."** She disappeared in a plume of smoke.

After Raiga succeeded in become her sage Katsuyu had allowed her submissive personality to lighten somewhat. She was still highly submissive as a whole, but she now teased Raiga and called him out; which she would have never done to Tsunade or Shizune.

Raiga looked at his fellow competitors and couldn't help but blush lightly at the dumbfounded stares he was receiving. He coughed lightly and gave them a small salute, "Yo."

Naruto chose that moment to speak up, "YOU'RE AN ERO-SENNIN!"

* * *

Tsunade stared at her Godson and couldn't help but groan.

He was far too much like Jiraiya.

She had, after learning from Katsuyu that he had completed Senjutsu training and would be competing in the Konoha Chunin Exams, chose to watch. Shizune was with her, as was Tonton. Karin, along with a Kumogakure Jonin named Yugito, were with them as well. Karin had been given permission to travel here by the Raikage while Yugito was after a short vacation.

Tsunade looked over at Karin and immediately scowled when she saw the redhead drooling at the sight of her lover. When she was informed about Raiga and Karin's relationship in one of many letters, she had been elated. Karin was a good girl, very pretty, and would help keep the Uzumaki strong if they ever considered children.

Now?

Now Tsunade saw Karin drooling at the sight of her Godson acting like an idiot.

She wasn't sure what to think.

* * *

Hayate took that moment to enter the fray, coughing as he spoke, "The Chunin Exam Finals will now begin. First match: Naruto Uzumaki v Neji Hyuga. All other competitors please vacate the arena."

Raiga walked towards the stands while keeping Hayate in his perifials.

Huh, so killing Kabuto kept the guy alive. Who woulda thunk it?

As he reached the competitors balcony/stands he immediately found his place against a wall and closed his eyes.

"Shino."

He bug user turned toward Raiga with a cocked head, "Yes?"

"Wake me up when it's my turn, will ya?"

Shino stared at him lightly before nodding lightly.

He happily drifted off to sleep.

* * *

A watched happily as the blond Uzumaki gave that Hyuga and uppercut to end the fight.

By Kami was that kid a little bitch.

Okay, yes, he understood that his village was responsible for that mess, even if it was against orders, but hadn't the kid learned of the word subtlety?

When he said it was Kumo's fault, the brat had the gall to stare directly at the Kage box and _sneer_.

If that were his own Shinobi he would have had his head on a pike for such dereliction.

"Hokage-sama."

Hiruzen winced, he knew A's character well enough. The use of proper honorifics were rare and it showed how annoyed he was, "Yes Raikage-sama?"

"Control your Genin."

The Kazekage watched this exchange with blatant amusement.

* * *

Shino lightly tapped Raiga on the shoulder, "Your match is to begin Raiga-san."

Raiga opened his eyes and nodded, "Thanks man!"

He jumped up, stretched lightly, and headed over to the balcony bars.

He jumped over them.

A short fall later Raiga found himself in the center of the Arena.

Hayate chose that moment to speak, "If Dosu Kinuta does not arrive within the next 5 minutes Raiga Uzumaki will be declared the winner."

* * *

A stared at the field before he began to grin, "Hiruzen."

"Hmm?"

"If this Dosu brat doesn't show up I want to see a fight between Raiga and that Gaara kid."

The Kazekage intervened, "While I am sure it would be an entertaining battle, Gaara has been training for young Sasuke."

A shrugged, "And the Uchiha's late. We'll do the same thing we did with the Oto Genin, 5 minutes or bust."

Hiruzen gave a nod, "A Chunin that shows up late during a mission is no Chunin. If Sasuke does not show up while we wait for Dosu Kinuta, then he will be disqualified."

The Kazekage scowled behind his veil.

* * *

"Dosu Kinuta has not shown up in the allotted timeframe; Raiga Uzumaki is the winner."

The crowd offered boo's at the unsatisfactory win.

"Next fight with be Gaara v Sasuke Uchiha please-" Hayate was cut off by Genma, one of the Hokage's guard. He began to whisper into Hayata's ear, and left when Hayate gave a nod.

"Sasuke Uchiha has been disqualified for tardiness." The crowd began to scream in outrage, "The next fight will be Raiga Uzumaki v Gaara."

Raiga grinned happily.

Gaara made his way into the Arena via a Suna shunshin.

Hayate looked the two over, "Are you both ready?" They gave each other a tight nod.

"Begin!"

* * *

Sakura couldn't help but let loose a sigh. Nor could Ino, who was sat next to her. Tenten, who was next to Ino was already in a slump from when Neji lost.

Sasuke-kun never showed up.

She had known that he was being trained by Kakashi-sensei but…

But did that mean he had to be as late as their Sensei?

Her musing was interrupted by a very loud cheer from a group of distinctively female voices directly behind her. She, Ino and Tenten all turned around to see who was being loud.

There was a redheaded girl with glasses and red eyes.

A blonde girl with her long hair held up in a braid.

Both were wearing Kumogakure Hitai-ates.

Then there was a brunette in a dress of some sort holding a… pig?

Then there was-

"Tsunade-sama…" Came the voice of Tenten. She had stars in her eyes as she took in her idols appearance. It was safe to say that the appearance of the female Sannin was a big deal.

Tsunade, noticing that her name was called, looked down, "Yeah kid?"

Tenten was starstruck, she couldn't form a sentence so Ino decided to help he out, "What are you doing here Tsunade-sama?"

She shrugged, "Cheering on the new head Slug Summoner." Tsunade had agreed with Raiga about keeping their familial relationship a secret, at least for now.

The Genin trio gawked, "How?!"

She shrugged, "He learned Senjutsu from Katsuyu. Any time there is a Senjutsu user from a Summons, the user immediately becomes the news head. I've been contracted to Katsuyu for over 30 years and rejected each and every attempt to teach me Senjutsu from her.

"But, enough about that, this is Shizune – my apprentice, Karin – Raiga's girlfriend, and Yugito – one of Kumo's S-rankers."

They immediately zoned on to Karin at the mention of her being Raiga's girlfriend, Tenten especially since she had gained a slight crush on the boy, "What's he like?"

Karin blinked, looking down at the younger girls, "Well… Raiga's a bit of a loner. He doesn't mind being outgoing, but his preference is to just be on his own and learn new techniques-"

"No, I meant as a boyfriend."

Karin's cheeks pinked lightly as she grinned lecherously, "Welllllllllll, he has an… Impressive... amount of stamina."

Tsunade groaned good-naturedly at Karin, who was acting like Toka more and more.

The Konoha Genin all went beat red.

* * *

As soon as Hayate called for the match to start Raiga shot into the air, his Chakra Wings buzzing loudly, as he dodged a blast of Sand from Gaara.

He flew high up into the air and grabbed a pair of thick scrolls, "Kai!"

The scrolls opened and from them came a torrent of Water. Gaara immediately backed away and hopped onto Sand that then began to float away from the impromptu lake that formed in the Arena.

Gaara, with a scowl marring his face, found his way to the Arena wall. His Sand began to surround him and a thick sphere formed as he began to chant. His Mother claimed that she wanted to hurt the Uzumaki, so what better way than to let her out?

Raiga looked at Gaara and more specifically at the sphere of Sand that surrounded the boy before grinning.

He took off to the opposite wall and sat down on the ledge. He closed his eyes and his face went blank.

* * *

While both Genin were on opposite sides of the Arena doing nothing a large-scale Konoha shunshin erupted from the middle of the Arena.

Kakashi Hatake, along with Sasuke Uchiha, had arrived.

They were standing atop the new lake looking quite bored.

Kakashi spoke up, "Ah, are we late?"

Hayate came down, "Yes, yes you are. Sasuke Uchiha has been disqualified."

"WHAT?!"

Kakashi let loose a sigh of relief. Truthfully, he didn't want Sasuke to fight Gaara. Gaara was an extremely dangerous foe, one Sasuke could have been killed by.

Hayate decided to repeat himself, "Sasuke Uchiha has been disqualified."

"But why?!" Sasuke's voice was cracking slightly.

"You didn't show up when all competitors were supposed to, nor did you come till over an hour later. Chunin that won't even show up to missions aren't worthy to be Chunin."

Sasuke grumbled lightly but nodded, he understood.

He just didn't like it.

"Currently the fight is Raiga Uzumaki v Gaara, please make your way out of the Arena while this is going on."

They nodded and left.

* * *

Raiga opnned his eyes. His pupil had expanded to where it covered the whole of his eye and his sclera had turned gold. His eyes were now surrounded by teal ovals that met at the bridge of his nose. A single black circle was prevalent between his lips.

He had gone into Sage mode.

Raiga had always been fascinated by Senjutsu. When he signed with Katsuyu he knew he would eventually learn Senjutsu. He had a goal in mind that required it.

And now he had met the goal.

Slowly, ever so slowly, Raiton Chakra began to form at the soles of his feet. The Senjutsu overlay turned the Chakra from what would normally be azure into silver. The Chakra began to climb up his body, to his legs, then waist, then torso, then his arms and finishing on his head.

He yelled out to the world his accomplishment, and was sure his Raikage was going to shit himself.

" _SENJUTSU – RAITON: RAITON NO YOROI!"_

Raiton no Yoroi was considered the pinnacle of Raiton Jutsu. It was what allowed the Sandaime Raikage to fight over 10,000 Shinobi during the 3rd Shinobi War. It was seen as Kumo's staple; their mark of glory.

And Raiga had learned it.

Well, in truth he stole it from A when he was living with the man, but A didn't care since there was a reason he was the only user of the technique.

Raiga was not born with the right body type to use the Raiton no Yoroi.

Raiton no Yoroi required the user to reach the pinnacle of their body's physical strength, in such a way that they would be able to treat their own body as the metal in which Chakra Flow was used on.

Yet, Raiga refused to believe he couldn't use such a technique purely due to a physical limitation. So, he researched constantly for a way to learn to Jutsu and found his way to Senjutsu. Senjutsu users instinctively hardened their bodies to the point that it was considered a form of blunt armor. That, in combination with the memorized notes of Raiton no Yoroi led to Raiga's claim to fame.

As he finished his statement Gaara's sphere of sand imploded in smoke. As the smoke cleared the Ichibi no Shukaku, in all its glory, was loose for the world to see.

The crowd erupted in pandemonium.

* * *

In the Kage box all 3 respective Kage had their jaws on the ground; none more so than A.

Raiga had said he was a Slug Sage but by all that was holy he was using _Raiton no Yoroi?!_

Yes, A took back his initial thought of Raiga. When he had found the lad he equated Raiga to a gold mine along with the mountain.

Raiga was now worth the gold mine, the mountain and all the land that encompassed it.

Raiton no Yoroi was an S-rank technique, and yet Raiga Uzumaki had improved upon it. How? Raiton Chakra, in its most pure form, came out silver. Kakashi Hatake's Chidori was so deadly due to the fact that it was a pure spear of Raiton Chakra.

And yet, Raiga had purified the Raiton no Yoroi.

B, as well as Darui, also had his jaw on the ground. His bro was able to go toe to toe with Gyuki due to that technique and now his own apprentice could do it?!

Hiruzen had always believed that the next generation would eventually outstrip the current one.

Clearly he was correct.

The Kazekage was just glad his fellow Kage were more interested in Raiga than the fact the Ichibi was loose.

* * *

Shukaku roared, _**"I'M BACK BABYYYYYYY!"**_

He looked at Raiga, the host of Chomei, bathed in silver and only knew that he wanted to kill the brat.

He sucked in his breath and let loose a blast of wind toward his annoyance.

* * *

 **Hey there y'all, Umodin back once more with a small update. I know it's a tiny chapter, but I honestly couldn't think to well. I'm still in rest mode from Finals.  
**

 **So, there you go; the reason Raiga had wanted to learn Senjutsu. Aside from the fact that it gave him a huge power boost, Senjutsu allowed him the ability to utilize Raiton no Yoroi.**

 **Next Chapter will be a Bijuu bash. As well as the invasion.**

 **If you liked this, please Favorite/Follow and don't forget to give me a Review.**


	11. Invasion

Raiga may have been able to perform a bastardized version of his baa-chan's strength enhancement. He may have been able to use Senjutsu. He may have been able to use an improved version of Raiton no Yoroi, the pinnacle of Raiton jutsu.

But when he, surrounded in the silver sheen of his _Sempou: Raiton no Yoroi,_ was face to face with a blast of wind that would probably hurt even the Sandaime Raikage…

He got out of the way.

As he dodged, he belatedly realized that, yes, Bijuu's tended to cause damage. The wind tore a hole into the wall of the arena and blew apart a multitude of buildings in Konoha.

He heard a bang go off in the direction of A-sama and, not a moment afterwards, a slew of feathers appeared throughout the Arena. Civilians began to fall asleep and Shinobi were attacked from all sides by groups in grey and purple clothes signifying them as Otogakure Shinobi, tan and white glothes signifying them as Sunagakure Shinobi and…

Well, this time Raiga was truly confused.

Matted in greys and blacks, covered in blank white masks and all wielding a tanto of some format, were the agents of ROOT.

Raiga shook off his muted shock, he would have never suspected Danzo to side with Orochimaru this far, and turned his full attention on Shukaku.

Shukaku looked to be sucking in a breath once more, and before he could fire off another devastating blast of wind Raiga _charged._

The effects of Raiton no Yoroi, be it the normal version or the enhanced version incorporating Senjutsu, in combination with his strength enhancement gave Raiga an advantage no other Shinobi could claim to possess.

Tsunade was known for being like a fortress, unmoveable and unstoppable in the right conditons.

A was known for being like the lightning he wore as armor, always moving and capable of plowing through the hardest of walls.

When an unmovable force and an unstoppable force meet, they tend to cause havoc.

Raiga, however, combined the two.

He disappeared in a flash of silver and Shukaku found his engorged stomach stamped down. He may have been the weakest of the Bijuu, regardless of his detest for such a title, but he was also the heaviest of his brethren. So naturally, it came as a surprise when not only was he battled back, he was kicked so hard by Chomei's Jinchuriki that he actually _flew_.

He did not like flying.

As Shukaku flew Raiga couldn't help but grin ferally at the direction he was going.

Shukaku's body crashed directly into the purple cube like barrier that cut the Kage's off from the rest of the village.

* * *

Hiruzen was a man of many things. He was the student of the Nidaime Hokage. He was the sensei of what were now known as the Sannin. His prodigal student turned traitor, his female student ditched the village and his loyalist student was generally gallivanting about, claiming that he was making use of his spy network.

But now… Now he was face to face with that very prodigal student and in a way that he would have never believed.

Orochimaru had murdered the Yondaime Kazekage and using a Kinjutsu of his own creation stole the man's face and caused an _invasion_ on his homeland. And the only thing on his face was pure, unadulterated _amusement._

Hiruzen had always known Orochimaru was lost, but for him to go this far…

Hiruzen would shed tears for this at a later date, his student needed to die now.

But, while Orochimaru was always lost, Hiruzen could feel the knife of betrayal stab him in the gut as he stared at the man directly next to his wayward student.

Clothed in the traditional armor of the Senju in grey colors was a man he'd never have believed to betray the village. His face was linear and aged, a jagged cross scar hung at his chin and his black hair was beginning to gray ever so slightly.

Danzo Shimura, Hiruzens shadow, had joined an invasion _against_ Konoha. It was well known throughout the world that Danzo was a patriot of the highest order.

It just didn't make sense.

"Danzo… Why?!"

He sneered at Hiruzen, hatred billowing in his coal black eye, "Because you have brought this village to tools needed to become the worlds greatest power, but you lack the drive to _take it!"_

He pointed over at the arena, where Shukaku's back was noticeable to them, and the ruin that the beast wrought upon his village, "Do you see that? The power of a Bijuu?! Konoha has the Kyuubi, the _greatest_ of its kind, and yet you _refuse_ to train the host! Our _weapon!_ And now there are _four_ more Bijuu in Konoha. The Ichibi, Nibi, Nanabi and Hachibi are all _here._ "

He then uncovered his right eye, showing the infamous pinwheel of the Uchiha, and removed the heavy clamp on his right arm, showing the face of their Shodaime on his shoulder and 10 Sharingan implants.

He darkly proclaimed to Hiruzen, his right eye turning into the 4 pointed pinwheel of Shisui Uchiha's Mangekyo, "And I will take them all for the village. With their power under my command, Konoha will no longer be a member of the 5 Great Shinobi Villages.

"We will be an _Empire_."

Hiruzen just couldn't understand Danzo. True the Bijuu were power incarnate, but they were distributed by the Shodaime! Did the man honestly

It was at this moment that Hiruzen truly regretted his decision to spare his rivals life. Now he understood what Danzo meant when he proclaimed that Hiruzen's weakness would lead to his downfall.

A voice sounded from behind Hiruzen, "This really isn't your day, is it shitflinger?"

A softer, feminine one sounded from behind Hiruzen once more, "No, sensei's always had worse luck with politics than I do gambling."

Another voice came, this time noticeably more annoying than the others, "We jus' gon' hafta show dese fools lifes next chapta."

A final voice was heard, and all that voice did was yawn, "This is so dull…"

Hiruzen mechanically turned around to see A, cloaked in the infamous Raiton no Yoroi, Killer B, cloaked in a red bubbling mass, Ranton no Darui looking as bored as ever and his last student cracking her knuckles with a glare in her hazel eyes.

Orochimaru finally spoke up, the amusement in his voice gone and now replaced with the hardened soldier Hiruzen had trained, "It seems that this won't be as simple as we had planned Danzo."

Danzo shook his head, a glimmer of insanity in his single black eye, "No. It was never meant to be easy.

"But, then again, all good things in the world require effort to achieve."

It was at that very moment that Shukaku crashed into the barrier, breaking it near instantly, and falling directly onto the building.

* * *

Yugito knew that it the reason she went on her trip to Konoha was to watch the Chunin Exams and subsequently watch her little brotherish figure destroy the whole of the competition.

She did not expect for an invasion to occur.

But, as she battle the forces of Oto and Suna with the strangers that made of the forces of Konoha, she knew that, logically speaking, she didn't have much of a choice.

She was aware of the hope her Kage had to create an alliance between Kumo and Konoha, effectively ending any major threats on their part for a long while. It made perfect sense in its own right, Kumo and Konoha were known as the top dogs, and the only force the could contest would be Iwa, which at the moment was still licking its wounds from the 3rd Shinobi War. Konoha may have been weakened, but they still held the legacy that won 3 consecutive wars.

In fighting with Konoha at this time, Kumo was one step closer from reaching the goal of alliance.

So, when her enhanced sense, due in part to her union with Matatabi, kicked in to gear and she smelled a multitude of snakes the size of a boss summon, she knew what she had to do.

She jumped up, her extended and flow coated nails cutting through a random Oto Shinobi, and headed towards the snakes.

" _Matatabi!"_

"… _ **Fine~…"**_

Her body was engulfed in azure flames and it began to grow. Soon, Yugito took on the form of Matatabi and did the one thing cats did the moment they saw prey.

She pounced.

* * *

When Shukaku attempted to get up, he felt something that he'd never felt before.

Tendrils of wood shot out from the ground and wrapped around his legs and tail. He could _feel_ his Chakra, his life energy, being sucked into the wood.

Shukaku's crazed eye surveyed around, noticing that Gyuki's container was nearby and his brother keeper. He turned his head and found what he was looking for.

A man, with black hair and grey armor, was using a hand seal and staring at the wood surrounding his body.

Shukaku, being the only Bijuu that wasn't captured by Hashirama Senju and being forced to submit to the power of his Mokuton, was not aware that this wood was only a small portion of what his brethren felt upon their capture.

And he didn't like it one bit.

" _ **I'LL EAT YOU YA LITTLE FLESHBAG! RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"**_

He rose his left arm, the only remaining portion of his body that didn't have wood on it, and slammed it down at Danzo's position.

Danzo hastily jumped out of the way, but the windsheer of the blast knocked him off balance.

It was at that moment that a volley of dense mist surrounded the building. Even with Shisui's Sharigan Danzo could not fully make out where it was cast, nor could he pinpoint the source of the thick Chakra that it came from. Only a moment of baited breath passed before Raiga appeared behind him under the guise _Sempou: Raiton no Yoroi_ with one of his swords drawn and an ugly sneer taking place from his normally smirking face.

He cut down on Danzo's pasty white arm, the source of his power to control the Ichibi, and grinned unrepentantly as he snatched the arm out of thin air. Danzo growled in fury as Raiga disappeared in a flash of silver, leaving no trace of what occurred aside from the obvious. The mist dissipated soon after, and Danzo landed back on the partially destroyed building, his arm missing and a look of rage on his face.

Raiga landed on top of Shukaku's stomach with his ever-present smirk on his face and held up Danzo's severed arm, which made Orochimaru lick his lips. Raiga sealed the arm away into one of his many storage scrolls. He then lifted his free arm up, symbols dancing across his fingers wreathed in violet flames and slammed his open palm down onto Shukaku's stomach.

" _Gogyo Fuin!"_

Shukaku let out one last scream of _**"NOT AGAIN!"**_ before his form seemed to absorb into itself. From the stomach that Raiga slammed down on, Gaara appeared to be completely asleep with a hole over the cloth covering his heart, showing Shukaku's seal now encased in an additional set of kanji.

Orochimaru looked at what was in front of him, and couldn't hold in the frown that escaped him. His original plan had been to resurrect the dead Hokage's and let them battle his sensei while he watched, happily, as his sensei was murdered by his predecessors and successor.

Now?

Now he was face to face with 6 S-rank individuals. His sensei, Tsunade, the Raikage, the Hachibi Jinchuriki, the Ranton user and finally, and most surprising, the Nanabi Jinchuriki.

Orochimaru briefly looked at what he caused to occur in Konoha, the carnage he wrought, if only temporarily, and nodded.

"Sensei, it appears as if I am outmatched."

Hiruzen, garbed in his armor, raised an eyebrow at his former student, "So you accept your death? I find that unlikely."

Orochimaru cackled, "No, nonono sensei, I merely stated that I am outmatched.

"I'll just have to gather allies and return to finish the job at a later date."

He went through a flurry of hand seals, pricked his thumb with his fore-fingernail and slammed it down on the ground…

" _Gyaku Kuchiyose no Jutsu!"_

And disappeared in a plume of smoke; transported to the Ryuchi Cave.

* * *

Danzo was quickly neutralized and beheaded by the six-some and the invasion ended. The casualty rate went as follows…

Oto: 534 dead and 329 injured.

Suna: 340 dead and 126 injured.

Konoha: 174 dead and 197 injured.

Kumo: 33 dead and 17 injured.

The reason Kumo had so few deaths and injuries was because they only brought 60 people, including Raiga, Samui, Karui, Omoi, Darui, B, Karin and A.

The most interesting thing that occurred at the end was that Hiruzen, on his hands and knees, begged both Jiraiya and Tsunade for one of them to take his place as Hokage. After much arguing between the 2 of them they decided to pick the Hokage the old fashioned way.

Rock Paper Scissors.

And, the most surprising turn of events, was when Jiraiya pulled out rock, Tsunade flashed him her boobs, making his hand go from a rock to paper in an attempt to touch them. She formed a scissor with her fingers and snapped at the hand with a grin.

Jiraiya called it unfair, but Tsunade proclaimed that she had absolutely no interest in becoming Hokage. Jiraiya didn't either, he said, but Tsunade argued that she'd stay in the village and take over the hospital if he did it. Hiruzen cut in and accepted Tsunade's decision before Jiraiya could come up with any further arguments.

Thus, Jiraiya was named Godaime Hokage.

The Kumo/Konoha alliance was finalized on that day, and Raiga, who had just been speed promoted to Tokubetsu Jonin, was named their ambassador.

Naturally, Raiga was not happy.

So he made a condition; that he'd become the ambassador on the condition that Karin be made his political partner and Yugito his combat partner. It wasn't unheard of, A used B for combat and Mabui for politics, so he agreed.

Tsunade even offered them lodgings in the Senju compound.

The relation between Suna and Konoha took a steep dive, what with Konoha's newest alliance and their betrayal, but it was determined that until they had a Godaime Kazekage to politic with that they would be temporarily neutral.

Gaara, as well as his teammates, was released after both Raiga and Jiraiya looked over and improved his seal.

All was well, for now.

* * *

Nagato stared at the newest addition to the Bingo Book at his Rinnegan blazed in fury.

 **Name: Raiga Uzumaki**

 **Title(s): Dorobo (Thief), Gin Shikon (Silver Fang)**

 **Affiliation: Uzumaki Clan, Kumogakure**

 **Age: 15**

 **Born: 7/7/041 SVE**

 **Rank: Tokubetsu Jonin**

 **Appearance: Raiga Uzumaki is male with a height of roughly 5'7. He has short red hair, amber eyes and tan skin. On his arms are a set of matching tattoos, believed to be a personalized Fuinjutsu. He wears dark colors, blacks and greys, and combat boots.**

 **Abilities: Twin-Blade Kenjutsu, Senjutsu, Raiton no Yoroi, Chakra-based Strength Enhancement.**

 **Crime: During an invasion on Takigakure, Raiga Uzumaki stole the whole of their Raiton Jutsu, Kinjutsu and Fuinjutsu, as well as the Nanabi no Kabutomushi- with which he is the Jinchuriki of.**

 **Wanted ALIVE: Iwagakure – 5,000,000 Otogakure – 20,000,000 Amegakure – 10,000,000 Kusagakure – 500,000**

 **Note: He is the apprentice of Killer B, and duo partner of Nii Yugito. It is believed that he, similar to them, is capable of using his Bijuu's form- but it is unknown**

 **APPROACH WITH CAUTION**

"So… The Nanabi's death was just a distraction…"

The stare of the Deva Path's Rinnegan could have burned the pages of his Bingo Book if it were any more deadly.

Konan, off to the side of the room, watched her childhood friend calm down. She could just barely make out a whisper.

"He shall know pain."

Konan sighed.

It appeared that the bounty on the Jinchuriki needed to be raised.

* * *

Raiga, still in Konoha, made his way to the forest. It had been 3 days since the invasion, and he had come to collect an item of great importance.

Before he even entered the arena, Raiga had created a multitude of Kage Bunshin and set them to hide. He wasn't certain if the invasion would occur, but if it did then he knew that there was no better opportunity to do this.

He came to the location that he, from the memories of one of his clones, stored the item in question.

At a small, unsuspecting tree was a barely noticeable patch of dirt.

He got down on his knees and dug into the dirt, finding what he was looking for.

A small wooden box.

He grabbed one of his many storage scrolls and readied it for what was inside the box.

Removing the lid from the box, he came across that which he made his clone steal.

During the invasion, while everybody was busy fighting, he had his clones under the Meisaigakure no Jutsu go into the Hokage tower and attempt to find the Scroll of Seals.

He didn't want them to _steal_ the item in question, that'd put a target on his back as a well known thief.

No, Raiga had them copy a technique from the scroll and hide it out in the forest, for him to pick up later on and learn at his leisure.

And now he looked at the scroll with two very well-known words on it with absolute glee in his eyes.

" _Edo Tensei."_

* * *

 **Hey there peoples, Umodin back with another update. Sorry about the wait, but I had other ideas i had to put to pen and kinda sorta forgot about Plot Thief.**

 **But no more!**

 **Anyways, I decided to make the invasion go by quickly, there was no way Orochimaru would risk legitimately dying and he wasn't going to survive so many S-rankers at once.**

 **I decided to make this much more AU and allowed Hiruzen to live as well as made Jiraiya the Hokage.**

 **Why?**

 **Because it made me giggle.**

 **If you liked this chapter please Favorite/Follow and don't forget to give me a Review!**


	12. What

Raiga stared at Jiraiya, the new Godaime Hokage with a blank face. It had been a week since the invasion, and in that time much had changed and Konoha was buzzing with activity. Their Hokage had stepped down giving the reigns of the village to his student Jiraya. Tsunade Senju had returned and taken over the Medic program. And now the village had a working peace treaty with Kumogakure. Konoha was busy, and as the newest envoy between the two villages, so were Raiga and Karin. But, what Jiraiya just asked…

"Would you mind repeating that?" Raiga calmly asked, though internally he might as well have screamed it.

Jiraiya wasn't even looking at Raiga. He was staring at the crystal ball on his desk, which held the picture of bathing women, and giggling perversely, "I need you to train up Naruto a bit."

Raiga ran his hand through his hair, his eye twitching ever so slightly, "May I ask why? And, more importantly, why me?"

Jiraiya nodded, writing down on his notepad as he stared at the crystal ball with drool seeping from his mouth, "Yeah -hehe go girl!- since I'm stuck as Hokage, I can't train him anymore. He isn't the type to read scrolls I give him, so that's a bust, and there's no way I'll be able to spare any time for him with all this damn work I've gotta do. But then it hit me! We've got another Uzumaki here, and a Tokubetsu Jonin that doesn't have any current assignment at that, that doesn't have anything to do."

Raiga blandly replied, "You do realize that as a Kumogakure Shinobi I have no reason whatsoever to bother with him? Even more so when he's a Jinchuriki."

Jiraiya pouted at the crystal ball, Raiga stole a peak and saw that the women were leaving the bath, and finally turned his full attention to Raiga, "You're now the envoy between Kumogakure and Konohagakure. That means that you are to follow the commands of both your Raikage and me, the Hokage, so long as my orders don't get in the way of A's. Now, I can't tell you to go on missions, the position as an envoy is technically a long term one, but I can tell you to do a few things. I, acting with the power as Hokage, am telling you to temporarily take over mentorship of Naruto Uzumaki until I am capable of returning to that station."

Having never heard Jiraiya talk so formally, Raiga was naturally wide-eyed. He then let out a tired groan; this would mean he would have even less Karin time. He had barely had any time with her ever since the invasion ended, and prior to that he hadn't seen her in over a month!

He wanted to have sex damnit!

Raiga tiredly slumped into the chair he was sat in, as was his right to sit in a chair as an envoy, and looked at Jiraiya with a dull stare, "Fine, but I've got some conditions."

Jiraiya raised an eyebrow, "You think you're in a position to make conditions?"

Raiga shook his head, "No, but there are two envoys, me and Karin, and I can always return to Kumo and let her take over."

Jiraiya frowned, "Fine, whad'ya want?" his mannerisms returned to normal the moment things didn't go his way.

"I don't know what to teach the kid, but I need to know for a fact if he's a true blooded Uzumaki or just somebody that uses the name. If he's not one, I'll just help him out with what he's poorer in, but if he is one I can give him some proper lessons."

"He is one, there's no question about that."

Raiga nodded, "So his mother _is_ Kushina-sama then." He was well aware of Naruto's lineage, but he also understood subtlety. If others found out his knowledge, he'd be assassinated on the spot.

Jiraiya's eyes hardened, "Naruto is not to know of his lineage until the time is right."

Raiga raised an eyebrow, "You'd allow the only living member of the Uzumaki head family to not know of his mother?"

Jiraiya nodded, his demeanor completely serious, "Normally, I'd be like you and just tell the kid this stuff, but he has absolutely no self-control at the moment. I, along with all of my Shinobi Council, believe him to be a liability until he reaches Tokubetsu Jonin status with such information."

Raiga nodded, having come to the same conclusion a long time ago, "Fine, I won't bother with Uzumaki stuff, I don't know much anyways. Karin's an Uzumaki too, and the only stuff we've got of the clan are a few scrolls her mother gave us."

He pondered silently, before nodding, "Right, I'd like, in exchange for helping him out, access to some of Konoha's Suiton Jutsu."

Jiraiya bemusedly stared at Raiga, "You think I'd let a known thief go near our archives?"

Raiga chuckled, both because of the situation and the fact that he already stole the most infamous of all Jutsu from their archives, "I didn't mean that. My second affinity is Suiton, but Kumo doesn't really have any good Jutsu in that department. I just want to read a few scrolls, C and B rank Jutsu, as payment. I won't take them, hell i'll read them in front of your Anbu if you want, I just want to jot 'em down and have something to do with my time."

Jiraiya took on a thinking pose; it wasn't a big deal. Raiga, he'd never call an S-rank a kid regardless of age, hadn't really asked for much. But, even though Kumo and Konoha were now allies, the idea of giving another village a boost in power for one of their pillars, their S-rankers, ate at his insides.

Begrudgingly, Jiraiya nodded, "Fine, that's doable. No A-rank techniques, but a few C and B-ranks will be given to you in exchange for Naruto's supplementary training."

Raiga nodded with a smile on his face, "What should I teach him? Did you have a plan or should I wing it?" Raiga had never once taught anybody before, so any guidance would be useful.

Jiraiya hummed quietly, "I didn't have any actual plans. I taught him summoning recently, so originally all I was going to do was focus on that. Y'know, make him be able to summon only certain toads, not just tadpoles and the boss summon."

Raiga nodded, "I can't help him with that, but I've got an idea of what to do."

* * *

Naruto was many things, but patient was not one of them. He, along with Sakura and Sasuke had been waiting at their training grounds for over an hour already, and he knew that he'd probably be stuck waiting around for two more.

Still, Naruto knew that a lot had changed. His Jiji had stepped down, though instead of Naruto himself taking the spot of Godaime, it went to Ero-sennin. That meant that Naruto was the student of the Hokage, so he was alright with that decision.

During the invasion, since it was so short due to his maybe-cousin, Naruto mainly helped with evacuating. He may not have cared about classwork, but he knew that Shinobi were there to protect Civilians. He knew that his ability to create so many Kage Bunshin was weird, but in this case it was a happy oddity. This had gained him a much better reputation with the populace of Konoha.

His thoughts were interrupted by a cough from behind. Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura all turned around, only to be face to face with Raiga Uzumaki, who wore an annoyed expression on his face and was tapping his foot impatiently. Raiga had been a major topic of discussion among the "Rookie 12" as they were called.

To be fair, he'd taken down the Ichibi in front of the whole of Konoha.

Sakura piped up, her voice much more timid than it usually was, "H-how can we help you Raiga-sama?" She, along with Ino, Hinata, Shino, Neji and Tenten had all started to call him Sama due to his new status as a local hero.

Raiga looked at her, his normal smirk was formed into a scowl that only Sasuke could match, and jerked his head at Naruto, "I need the pipsqueak."

"Hey! I'm not a pipsqueak!"

"Fine, I need the orange monstrosity."

"Stop making fun of me-ttebayo!" Naruto whined.

Raiga snorted, "Whatever. Look, I was bribed to whip you into shape by Jiraiya, and I don't like wasting time."

Naruto looked noticeably pleased. Sakura was staring at Raiga incredulously. Sasuke looked annoyed, "How come the Dobe gets training?"

Raiga shrugged, "Before Jiraiya even knew he was gunna be Godaime, he'd been giving Naruto some pointers. Call the man what you will, but he sees his investments through to the end, and Naruto is one of those investments at this point."

Sasuke stared at Raiga wordlessly before offering a short nod, "May I join you as well?" he may have been antisocial, but this was training with somebody that, though he was loathe to admit, outclassed him; for now.

Raiga blinked, not having expected such a question, "Well… Hm." He looked up at the sky; his arms crossed and thought aloud, "Should I let the twerp join in..?"

He nodded, returning his stare to the now scowling Sasuke, "I'll give you the same deal I gave Jiraiya; I take bribes. What do you have that'd interest me from the Uchiha Clan Jutsu Archives?"

Sasuke's Sharingan appeared and his scowl was quickly accompanied by a glare, "You think I'd part with my clan's techniques for _lessons_?!"

Raiga looked at Sasuke's Sharingan before a creepy grin began to form on his face. A disturbing giggle escaped his mouth and he stared at Sasuke with hunger.

"Alright, I've got an idea. Free lessons if, and _only_ if…

You allow me to experiment on you in order to develop a Fuinjutsu that makes Dojutsu useless in combat."

Sasuke choked on air, more of a reaction than either Naruto or Sakura had ever seen from him, and shouted at Raiga, "THAT'S WORSE THAN TAKING FROM OUT ARCHIVES!"

Raiga shrugged, "Hey, I have a valid reason for wanting that."

"And what could that possibly be?!"

"Your brother."

That caught Sasuke off guard in an instant, "What?" he whispered. Sakura looked confused and Naruto listened attentively, having remembered Sasukes mention of a brother back in Nami no Kuni.

"Itachi Uchiha is currently a member of a group of Nukenin known as Akatsuki. Akatsuki, while largely unknown, is made up of purely S-rank criminals from various Shinobi Villages. For reasons you don't need to be aware of, the Akatsuki are building up their forces to hunt down certain people. I am one of these peoples, and need every trick I have to protect myself."

Sasuke stilled. Ever since Orochimaru had marked him, he had been thinking of Itachi more often. He knew that as he was now there was absolutely no way he'd be able to defeat Itachi, even with the Chidori. But, regardless of his understanding that he'd lose, Sasuke _needed_ to fight Itachi. And now…

"Itachi's going to come for you?"

"Eventually. Itachi likely has a different target, but I have the intention of killing any and all that come after me. He'll be sent for me at that point in time, but right now I should be in the clear."

It took Sasuke only a moment to think on it, "Fine." Afterall, it made perfect sense to Sasuke. He was going to be spending time with a literal Itachi magnet. Itachi would come to Raiga, meaning Sasuke wouldn't have to search for his kin-slaying brother.

Raiga nodded, he didn't actually believe that he could actually create a seal that would make the Sharingan, or more specifically the Mangekyo Sharingan, useless. But, Sasuke had given him the opportunity to _try_ , which was worth more than he could have asked for. "Cool. But we won't be doing that today. I need some one on one with Naruto at the moment."

Naruto let out a startled yelp when Raiga randomly grabbed him by the neck of his jumper and literally _dragged_ him off of the training ground.

* * *

They found themselves back at the same waterfall area that Naruto and Jiraiya had trained the Kuchiyose no Jutsu at. Raiga walked on the water, beckoning Naruto to follow, and sat down on the stream. Naruto, just to be safe, took off his jumpsuit, leaving him in just his boxer and an undershirt, and followed Raiga onto the water. He slowly sat down on the water, having noticeably more trouble than Raiga did, and looked to his newest mentor expectantly.

Raiga, ever the blunt, started out by saying, "I'm a Jinchuriki."

Naruto nodded, "I know, Kaka-sensei told me what that word meant."

"You're a Jinchuriki."

Naruto's head fell, "…Yeah…" he quietly stated.

"Do you know what it means to be a Jinchuriki?"

"We're sacrifices, right?"

Raiga hummed, "In a way. The Power of Human Sacrifice is both literal and figurative. In order to seal a Bijuu inside of a person, the seal requires a human life to empower it. In my case, the previous Jinchuriki of the Nanabi was my sacrifice. And yours…"

Narutos eyes widened, "… The Yondaime." He breathed out in earnest sorrow.

Raiga blurted out a laugh, "No. The Yondaime wrote the seal and applied the power, but he wasn't the sacrifice – he _couldn't_ be. True a sacrifice is needed, but the person doing the sealing can't die midway through the process, or else the whole thing would be for naught."

Naruto breathed out a sigh of relief, before angrily looking at Raiga, "What's the big idea?! Scaring me like that –ttebayo!" He abruptly fumbled about on the water, having lost his balance for a moment in his anger.

"I didn't mean to scare you brat. Anyways, back on topic. What does being a Jinchuriki do for you?"

Naruto let out a deadpan, "Gives me a bunch of Chakra and makes my village hate me."

Raiga let out a snort, "True, but it does other things. Each Bijuu offers an ability of sorts to their host. The Ichibi gives his host the ability to manipulate sand. The Nibi gives her host the flexibility of a cat as well as her flames. The Sanbi gives his host a myriad of Genjutus in the form of mist. The Yonbi gives his host the Yoton. The Gobi gives her host the ability to use something called Echolocation and the Fuuton. The Rokubi gives his host the ability to secrete acid from their skin. The Nanabi, my Bijuu, gives me my Chakra Wings. The Hachibi gives his host the ability to spit an ink that, if used properly, can multiply the effects of Fuinjutsu. And finally the Kyuubi gives his host an enhanced regeneration factor which not only heals you quickly, but also makes Chakra exhaustion a nonentity."

Naruto, naturally, was wide eyed at the information dump.

Raiga continued on, completely ignoring Naruto's stunned look, "Now, the Bijuu are actually sentient beings. Think of them like you do one of your Toad Summons. They have feelings, and are naturally prideful- so how do you think the Kyuubi feels about being stuck inside your gut?"

Naruto vehemently shook his head, "The Kyuubi attacked Konoha! He killed the Yondaime!"

Raiga nodded, "That he did. Regardless of that though, he is now your tenant, and as such it is your duty as a landlord to check in on him from time to time." Raiga held out a fist, "Bump fists with me, and we'll go into your mindscape to speak with the Kyuubi."

Naruto dubiously did as told, and found the world around him fading to black until he returned to the sewer from when Ero-sennin pushed him off that cliff. Raiga was next to Naruto looking around the sewer curiously.

They walked down the damp pathway mindlessly until the light of the sewer, which was iridescent, began to turn crimson. Soon, they were at the front of a giant pair of bars with a single tag with a small seal on its middle.

A giant slit red eye opened and stared at the pair with hatred, _**"So, my host returns once more…"**_

A voice from behind Naruto cut in, making him jump and turn around only to see Raiga sitting atop the head of a gigantic collared beetle, _**"Come now Kur-"**_

 _" **DO NOT CALL ME THAT NAME IN FRONT OF MY HOST NANABI!"**_ Naruto looked at the Kyuubi, who went from being annoyed to downright murderous at whatever the Nanabi said.

Chomei sighed, his guttural voice shaking the waters of the sewer, _**"My host knows all of our names brother."**_

 _" **You** **dare** **tell some ningen my name without my consent? Then moment I'm released from this cage I will rip your wings off of your back."**_

Chomei buzzed angrily, _**"Do you take me for a traitor? No, my Rai-gaki found a book with our names in it, as well as the story of our Father."**_

Kurama stilled, his anger slowly leaving. The whole reason that the Bijuu had been attacking people during the Clan Wars was because their names, all but Shukaku's, had been forgotten. He looked atop his younger brothers head to see the same red hair he detested, _**"Ningen, where is this book?"**_ he demanded.

Raiga raised an eyebrow, "Burned." He blandly replied. The book didn't exist, he knew this information from Roberts memories, and even if it did exist there's no way in hell he'd not have burned it.

Kurama growled, _**"Why would you burn our Father's legacy?"**_

"I figured that you and your kin wouldn't be big fans of a book that had information on the Gedo Mazo getting out."

Kurama's eye widened exponentially. He let loose a guttural roar and slammed his skull into the bars of the seal, causing water to wake all around the sewer, _**"NEVER SPEAK OF THAT AGAIN NINGEN!"**_

Naruto, tired of being ignored, cut in, "What's a Gedo Mazo?! Quit ignoring me!"

Raiga turned his attention to Naruto, "Naruto, if you know what's good for you never mention that in front of a Bijuu." Both Chomei and Kurama nodded, completely serious at Raiga's statement.

His attention returned to Kurama once more, "Now, on the topic of the Mazo, I come to tell you that a group called the Akatsuki has found it, and their leader has the intention to collect the Bijuu."

Kurama stilled, he knew that humans were foolish but he never once thought them capable of such idiocy. Suddenly, he let out the lowest and most ferocious growl Raiga had ever heard, _**"Madara…"**_

Raiga nodded, "I think so too, though I'm not certain. Anyways, it's in your best interest to not try and corrupt the brat here when he taps into your reserves. Since you're well aware that even if you were free you wouldn't be able to stop what is to come without aid."

Kurama snarled. He turned his eye to his pathetic excuse for a host, who looked both confused and frightened, and snorted. Pathetic, _**"He is far too weak to even hope to use my Chakra."**_

"Of course he is, just look at him. Still, until the time comes where he _can_ use it, don't try and off him."

Kurama hummed noncommittedly before returning his attention to his brother, _**"You vouch for this Ningen?"**_

 _" **I do brother."**_

Kurama nodded, _**"If he uses my power he will die."**_ Raiga squawked, not thinking Kurama wouldn't at least _try_ and help.

He roared, _**"NOW LEAVE!"**_

Naruto and Raiga, with Chomei, were all flung out of the mindscape.

Upon returning to reality Raiga noticed that Naruto had progressively been sinking into the water while he was still sitting comfortably. When Naruto opened his eyes he completely fell into the lake, and began to thrash about.

Raiga sighed, he honestly didn't want to do this. His only intention was to be a nuisance to Naruto, not actually work with the kid. But, assignments were assignments.

"Right, onto the shore."

* * *

Raiga looked at Naruto, "What Jutsu do you know?"

Naruto nodded, his body still wet underneath his jumper, "Henge, Kawarimi and Kage Bunshin." He stated proudly.

"Anything else?"

"Nope!"

Raiga groaned, that was just sad, "Fine, we'll fix that right now. How many Kage Bunshin can you make at a time?"

Naruto grinned and put his hands into the familiar cross seal. A massive burst of Chakra followed and from where Naruto stood, nearly a thousand Bunshin appeared.

Raiga whistled, "Wow, pretty damn good twerp. Now, what do you know about the Kage Bunshin?"

Naruto tried to talk but his clones continuously butted in. Raiga, having been a pro at ignoring Omoi, only paid attention to the main Naruto, "Well, since I can't hear you you're gunna have to listen to me. The Kage Bunshin is Chakra intensive because it doesn't require an element and is used for espionage. The next time you meet up with Hatake, make sure to ask him what the secret to the Kage Bunshin is."

The Naruto's all nodded along and Raiga continued, "There are many variations of the Kage Bunshin. You showed me the Tajuu Kage Bunshin, which makes a mass number of clones. There is also one to multiply kunai and other thrown weapons. It's one of the Sandaime and Yondaime Hokages more well known tricks."

Naruto seemed to have a gleam in his eye at the thought of being like the Yondaime and happily nodded along.

"Now, I'm not really interested in teaching you, so we're going to do something simple. I'll give you a scroll and you learn it, just like I'm told you did for the Kage Bunshin." He dug through the multiple pockets of his vest and withdrew a small scroll and handed it to Naruto.

Naruto stared at the scroll and he began to cackle loudly.

 _Bunshin Daibakuha_

* * *

 **A/N: Hey there guys, Umodin back with another Plot Thief update. This is a little weak in comparison to the last chapters that have been continuously building up, but I needed to get something like this into the story. I am perfectly well aware that the Narutoverse is not just main characters, which means Raiga cannot just faceroll the series. I need to add some actual dialogue into this stuff, so I decided to make him the _reluctant_ temporary teacher of Naruto.  
**

 **So what does he do? He subtly gets his revenge on Jiraiya by teaching Naruto the one Jutsu that'd make him go from being a mediocre Genin to _oh my god who's idea was it to give him unlimited explosions?!_ **

**Ahem.** _  
_

 **If you liked this please Favorite/Follow and don't forget to write a Review.**


	13. Jiraiya's Revenge

Jiraiya knew he had a set of faults, though none of them were especially bad in his professional opinion. Yes, he was perverted- _nay_ , he was a super pervert. But, that wasn't bad. His main source of revenue came from his peaking tendencies in the form of inspiration for his bestselling series Icha Icha. True, he probably shouldn't have gained inspiration in that way, it only made people, both male but primarily female, angry. But he was willing to take their anger in the form of a punch to the face if it meant he'd be getting those gigantic paychecks from such inspiration.

But not anymore.

No, he'd been forced into a job he'd been avoiding for years. Originally, Sarutobi-sensei told him that he wanted Tsunade to become Yondaime after the Second Shinobi War, she had the temperament and wouldn't take any of the shit his advisors would give. But that failed, Tsunade had left the Village in her own grief due to the losses of her brother, lover and the last members of the Senju.

Then, Sarutobi-sensei wanted to make him Yondaime, but he was able to skirt around that job by saying Minato was a rising star, and if given time to flourish would be a perfect replacement. Orochimaru hadn't been a fan of that, apparently he wanted to be Yondaime. To be perfectly honest, Jiraiya was just bullshitting like crazy when it came to Minato's skill to get his sensei off his back, but 'lo and behold, Minato actually _was_ an amazing candidate for Hokage. Sarutobi-sensei was happy, Jiraiya was happy, Orochimaru wasn't happy, Tsunade was binge drinking.

All was well.

When Minato had died along with Kushina, Jiraiya had been devasted. He thought of Minato as a kind of favored nephew, which was apparently a mindset many Jonin-sensei's held for their students. But, Jiraiya was a true Shinobi, which meant he knew that even in the face of tragedy he needed to keep a calm head.

Which was why he got out of the Village without taking his Godson with him. Well, partially, though he refused to admit to anybody but himself that he was just too cowardly. That and the council would have _loudly_ fought him on taking the newest Kyuubi Jinchuriki from the Village. Now that he thought about it, there were a multitude of reasons he didn't take Naruto with him, but whatever.

If he stuck around, he would be forced to be the Godaime. Jiraiya _knew_ his sensei was too old and weathered for the position, at least for long term, and Jiraiya had absolutely no interest in giving the man a chance to guilt-trip him into taking the accursed position. Call Tsunade superstitious when it came to her views on the Hokage, but she had the right of it when it came to the job being absolutely _terrible_.

So, years passed by simply enough. He took over Orochimaru's role as Spymaster, since that little snake turned traitor, and created a network through the various brothels of the Elemental Nations. He may not have been the most inconspicuous of Spymasters, the position meant one should be relatively unknown, but he did have a monopoly on that portion of the world. His Icha Icha series also grew in popularity; his need to visit brothels for his job meant he always had inspiration about.

And now here he was. Stuck behind the desk he had been avoiding for nearly twenty damn years.

He blamed Tsunade's little Uzumaki brat.

 _So what_ if the kid essentially stopped an invasion? _So what_ if he took down a Bijuu with minimal property damage in front of a stadium filled to the brim with mission scouts? _So what_ if he was the major reason Tsunade decided to stick around in Konoha? _So what_ if…

Jiraiya chose to ignore the fact that the kid earned all of his praise for his part in the invasion.

Raiga Uzumaki had forever gained Jiraiya's contempt when the brat took Tsunade to the side right before their game of Rock Paper Scissors. The moment she returned she had this… this _look_ in her eyes. He and Tsunade readied their fists, and as Jiraiya pulled rock and Tsunade scissors, she used her other hand to pull down her top.

Jiraiya had dreamt of seeing those beautiful breasts ever since she developed when she was fifteen. The biggest bust in the whole of Hi no Kuni, and every time he tried to look he was beaten within an inch of his life. And at that very moment his hand went from rock to paper in an attempt to touch the glory that was Tsunade's chest. Tsunade grinned and snapped her fingers at his own, her enhanced strength actually sprained a few of his fingers, but the damage was done.

Jiraiya became Godaime Hokage all because Raiga Uzumaki had convinced Tsunade to show him her tits.

A small voice in the back of his mind told him it was worth it, but Jiraiya was stubborn. He'd been avoiding this job for _years_ and to have a little munchkin trick him into it? Oh no, the moment Raiga was made envoy between Kumo and Konoha Jiraiya knew he was going to torture the little shit. Not physically, no that'd just lead to far more problems than needed, nor would he mentally, since the kid didn't go near Jiraiya unless it was needed.

No, he tortured him by sic'ing his Godson on him.

Sorta.

It was more along the lines of abusing his authority and tricking a 15 year old in tutoring the little cretin. He may have been an S-rank Shinobi, but the brat was still in his teens and didn't know inter-village politics well. Jiraiya told him that, as an envoy between Konoha and Kumo, the kid had to listen to both the Kage's.

A complete and total lie. But, he didn't know that, and he probably wouldn't make a fuss since he was new to his job. So yeah, Raiga had to take over his teaching duties for Naruto, and hopefully that would mean Jiraiya could both gain his subtle revenge and deal with this idiotic amount of paperwork thanks to Oro-teme's failed invasion.

That was two weeks ago. Jiraiya was only slightly worried, he had checked on the Crystal Ball, but Raiga had warded the training ground they were using out of range using Fuinjutsu. The Crystal Ball was an invention of the Nidaime Hokage, and since the kid was Tsunade's Godson it wasn't _completely_ unexpected that he might have known how to avoid the item. But, Jiraiya was a Spymaster and he absolutely _loathed_ not knowing something important. He also belatedly realized that he'd need to train a replacement Spymaster since he wasn't able to check on his contacts anymore; maybe that Hatake kid Minato trained? Actually, that was a pretty good idea…

Anyways.

Jiraiya had asked Karin, the girl that stuck in Konoha with Raiga, to get Raiga to write up an update on Naruto's status. He didn't need anything major, he just wanted to know how his Godson was doing and what he was learning.

So as he looked at the letter in front of his face he couldn't help but twitch his eyebrow while his teeth gnashed in frustration.

 _sALuTatIoNs hOKagE-SamA:_

 _FisHCAke'S DoINg aLriGHt i TaUGht HIm SomE ClONe TrICks anD stUFF ;3_

 _SInCeRLey,_

 _uR FaVOritE PErsOn EvAr omg :D_

 _rAIga uZUmAkI_

 _P.s. I hOpe YoU LIkeD mY nEw fOnt. i Think I sHOuld mArKEt iT. wHaT dO YoU sAy?_

 _p.S.s. (P.p.S.?) hErE's A sELf-poRTraiT jUSt fEr u!_

t(*^*t)

Jiraiya didn't care anymore. This brat wanted to play hardball?

Let the games begin.

* * *

Kakashi Hatake stood resolutely in front of the desk of the newest Hokage.

He was ten minutes early.

Why was he so early when in the minds of the majority of his fellow Shinobi he normally wouldn't show up to work until he was 3 hours late? He now served a man he idolized, and he'd been requested purely for "Research-based aid." Kakashi translated that to mean Jiraiya was asking for him to proofread his next masterpiece, so it was perfectly understandable that he break his general code of conduct and come as quickly as he could.

So now, here he was, in the office of Jiraiya-sama. But, contrary to his hope, there were no copies of Icha Icha around, nor were there any beautiful women in sailor uniforms.

Kakashi mournfully spoke, "You called for me Hokage-sama?"

Jiraiya hummed absently, drumming his fingers on his desk which as he looked out the window of his office. Kakashi noted that on the desk was a map of the Elemental Nations, with a mass of small dots covering what seemed to be forty civilian towns and minor Shinobi establishments. "Tell me Kakashi, prior to becoming Godaime what was I?"

"The author of Icha Icha of course."

"No. I will always write, regardless of my new threads, but what was I according to the Jonin and the higher ups?"

Kakashi paused for a moment, licking the brim of his mask in thought, "The student of the Sandaime… A Sannin… A Spymaster… A-"

"- Spymaster, that's what I was looking for. Yes, I was the Spymaster for Konoha. Both me and Danzo, I took on civilian rumors and he did Shinobi. Though, now that he's dead and we've had the time to look through his residence and ROOT bases, the Council has come to realize that he falsified a fair amount of his work in order to create discord."

Kakashi blinked his eye in confusion and cocked his head to the side, his hair defying gravity and not moving in any way, "What of it Hokage-sama?"

Jiraiya turned his attention fully on Kakashi, noting the man for once did not have one of his glorious books out, "I can't run my network anymore while I'm stuck running a Village. You, however, are very capable of doing so."

Kakashi's singular eye widened, "Hokage-sama, I have a team of students. I cannot just take over a position while I am already committed to their growth." Though, to be fair, he hadn't really taught them much. But he had plans, oh he had _plans_ for his cute little Genin.

Jiraiya huffed, "Do you think I care? I'm ordering you to take over. I already have plans for your team, remember that I taught Naruto for the Chunin Exam finals, but now that I'm in this position my network needs a new head. Your mission starts in 2 days' time, where you will spend the next 6 weeks going to each and every brothel I have noted on the map on my desk."

Kakashi was ready to protest, or at least that was the plan until he heard that last bit. Brothel what? He looked at the map on the desk and couldn't help but take a moment to goggle. He was getting… _paid to go to a brothel?!_

Clearly Jiraiya-sama was worthy of the position of Hokage.

Taking a moment to clear his suddenly dry throat, Kakashi spoke in monotone to his Hokage, "It shall be done Hokage-sama." He dared not to let any excitement be shown, lest he have this opportunity wrenched from his hand and be given to somebody like Genma or… _Gai_. He silently shuddered at the thought of his _youthful_ friend attempting and failing to inconspicuously go into any brothel without inform the whore's that they were " _wasting their Springtime of Youth_."

Jiraiya nodded, not knowing or caring what was going through Kakashi's mind, "Take the map and study it tonight. I want you to grab your team and bring them here so I can go over their new formation. They'll need somebody of Jonin or Tokubetsu Jonin rank in order for them to take missions, and I've got the _perfect_ candidate."

Kakashi nodded absently, more interested in the map then he was the person that got stuck with his team. He only wanted to train Naruto anyways, let them have Broody and Banshee.

* * *

Sakura lead her teammates to the Senju Estate in hopes of meeting Raiga-sama. She only knew the area because she had somehow, through pure luck, been able to get tutoring under Shizune, Tsunade-sama's apprentice, and occasionally they would meet here instead of the hospital in order to go over some of the more combat orient aspects of being a Mednin. Tsunade-sama had even said that if Shizune thought Sakura was good enough she might give a few pointers!

She couldn't help but let out a small, wistful sigh at the thought of what she had heard only moments ago. Her sensei had been selected to take over Godaime-sama's previous job, which was a huge honor, and needed to take some time off so he could get into his role. That was a major surprise, but what was next nearly floored her in anticipation.

Raiga Uzumaki-sama had been selected to take over as their Team Captain.

Sorta.

In truth, apparently Kumo was going all in with the alliance, and Jiraiya-sama wanted to have Raiga-sama learn the dynamics of the 4-man-cell that Konoha used in order to determine if Kumogakure should use it. She knew from Kabuto, and she had wondered where the boy had run off too, that Kumo used teams of two known as Duo's primarily. The team Raiga joined the Chunin Exam's with was a Duo, while Raiga-sama was apparently in one with that Yugito girl she met during the Finals.

But still, _Raiga Uzumaki-sama had been chosen to lead her team!_

She couldn't help but squeal a bit.

Oh sure, she knew he was far too much like Kakashi-sensei for her to well and truly gain any form of attraction to his person, and Sakura was committed to Sasuke-kun anyways. But, she was well aware that Ino-pig had a _massive_ crush on him. His actions were noteworthy to be fair to her; he almost singlehandedly stopped an invasion on Konoha!

It was _awesome!_

She had Sasuke-kun, the Rookie of the Year and her future husband on her team. She had Naruto and, though he was a bit of an idiot, he was being trained by Jiraiya-sama. And now she had the Savior of Konoha as her team captain.

Yes, Sakura was a happy girl.

So here she was, along with Naruto and Sasuke-kun, looking for their new team captain in the Senju compound. Naruto was happy because he knew their captain and had apparently been taught a B-rank ninjutsu by him. Sasuke was happy because this meant that Raiga couldn't ditch him and would actually teach him some stuff.

The team was pretty happy all around.

They didn't have access to the Senju Compound though, and Sakura was well aware that the place needed blood keys to enter. So she and her boys' were walking around the area, hoping to find their new captain training.

That was until they heard a noise.

"OOOOOOOooooh…"

Sakura new that voice. That was… Karo- Karin! Yes, that's her name. Sakura remembered her voice from the Final's, her memory had always been amazing.

Did she hurt herself?

Sakura motioned her head towards the sound and Naruto and Sasuke-kun ran forward. They were both in front of a window, noting that there were a pair of blind over it.

"AAAH! RAIGA!" came Karin's voice once more.

Sakura thought that the older girl must have been in immense pain. But this also meant that Raiga-sama was in the area, so at least he would be able to help.

"MAKE CLONES FOR ME RAIGA!"

Sakura stilled. Karin sounded… off. And why would she need clones? And what was that slapping sound from behind the window?

She looked at her teammates. Naruto was just as clueless as she was but Sasuke's eyes widened and his jaw slackened. His cheeks began to darken and he shifted back away from the wall uncomfortably. Did he understand something she didn't? But of course, that was Sasuke-kun, a genius all around.

"FUCK ME HARDER!" came Karin's voice once more.

She choked on the air. Her face went redder than her dress and she backed away from the window, hoping to escape this extremely embarrassing situation.

Naruto, however, did not seem to understand hers and her Sasuke-kuns desire to leave, and began to bang on the window, "STOP HURTING KARIN-CHAN!"

The slapping sound stopped and a few muffled curses came from what she presumed to be Raiga-sama. Before she could make her escape the window opened and the blinds were literally _torn_ off the ledge. There, in all his glory, was Raiga Uzumaki-sama, naked as the day he was born. Sakura couldn't help but let her eyes roam his body, and in that instant a small spark of jealousy hit her in the form of Karin.

Lucky bitch.

But, Raiga-sama looked angry. No, that wasn't a good word; he looked apoplectic. His tattoos began to glow and before Naruto could act like a bigger idiot he was _punted_ all the way to the other side of Konoha.

Raiga-sama turned to Sakura and Sasuke, it looked like smoke was streaming out of his nose he was so angry, "What. Do. You. Want?"

Sasuke wasn't able to form a word; he was far too embarrassed and mortified. Sakura, however, was able to quickly blurt out, "Yourourteamcaptainnowandwehaveamissiontomorrow!"

Raiga-sama stilled, before he let out a snarl, grabbed the back of Sasuke-kun's shirt and flung him _just as far_ as Naruto was punted.

He turned his full attention on Sakura now, "Give me the mission statement. _Now!_ "

She hastily handed him the scroll from her Kunai pouch and he snatched it out of her hand. He tossed it back into the room and before Sakura could say anything else he too grabbed her by the shirt and threw her in the direction of her teammates.

Not even a moment later he went back into the room, closed the window, and the slapping sounds resumed.

* * *

A few hours had passed, and Raiga finally looked over the scroll. He couldn't help but be angry at the time, he had _finally_ gotten some alone time with his girlfriend and they were interrupted by the Brat Brigaide? Nu-uh, he would _not_ be ending his well-deserved sex just for a bunch of kiddies.

The mission was weird, he didn't remember this from the Manga. It was possible it was from the Anime though, Robert found the Anime lacking and chose not to watch it. Still, he knew that this kind of shit was expected of him, so with a resigned sigh he took in his next waste of time.

In big bold letters was the mission statement, a C-rank escort to the Land of Tea for some brat name Idate Morino.

* * *

 **A/N: Hey there guys, Umodin back once more. I hope you like this, this chapter is a little slower, but I was hoping to get another one focussed more on the humor aspect of my Naruto rendition.**

 **There really isn't much to say about it, so I hope you enjoy this.**

 **Don't forget to Favorite/Follow and send me a Review!**


	14. Shinobi are insane

**Hiatus is over**

* * *

Idate Morino did not like Konoha, not one bit. Being branded a traitor of the village and forced into exile was a fair reason for that.

Truthfully, Idate didn't care for any form of shinobi, whether they be from a major village or a minor village. After being one and then having no choice but to take a look from the point of view of an outsider that took up residence in a village without shinobi, it was easy to dislike the greatest killers in the world.

Still, he knew that in the upcoming race would require an escort team, and Idate would have to suck up his general contempt for the village; if only for Boss Jirochou. Idate was to be the runner for Jirochou's family, the Wasabi clan, against the runner of the Wagarashi clan. The winner of the race would control the port town of Degurashi, so says the Daimyo of Ta no Kuni – the Land of Tea. Idate found the whole thing to be a little strange, but he understood it was better to settle a territorial dispute with a simple race than with bloodshed.

In any case, he did not like Konoha one bit, and when he was told that he would join the group that would go there to receive an escort?

Nope.

At the halfway point Idate made a run for it. He wasn't holding the mission scroll, he wasn't the boss – he was just a face that the shinobi escorts needed to learn and become familiar with so that they could better guard him. With that in mind Idate felt no reason to stick around, he knew the group had his picture on hand so that the Shinobi escorts would know who to look for; they didn't need him to be there physically.

So, here he was, sitting in a local tea shop, eating some delicious Ta no Kuni dumplings, when a curious sight came into view.

Entering the shop was a tanned teen his own age with red hair, yellowish eyes and a Kumogakure hitai-ate strapped to the side of his head with a small Konoha dogtag on his neck. It had been nearly three years since Idate had left Konoha, but he still remembered his lessons. When anybody, be it shinobi or civilian, wore a dogtag featuring the insignia of a Shinobi Village came into view, it became immediately obvious that that person was an ambassador of some sort.

No. While that in itself was strange -a Kumo-nin buddying up to Konoha of all places!- what truly caught Idate's attention was what was in the red head Kumo-nin's hand.

A leash.

A leash spreading three ways.

A leash spreading three ways attached to the necks of a trio of Konoha Genin, all who looked like they wanted to murder the Kumo-nin in the worst ways possible.

It took a considerable amount of restraint to not bust a gut right there. Served Konoha right!

"Raiga." The pink one said, she had a fairly nice voice Idate noted. "Why are we here?"

"I got hungry." The red one that Idate now knew was named Raiga said, dragging the trio towards one of the many open tables of the shop.

The blonde one in a blinding orange jumpsuit yelled loudly, causing the tea shop to echo. "WHY ARE WE IN COLLARS?!"

"Well." Raiga said. "I've never babysat, nor have I had to take missions with anybody that wasn't Bee-Shishou, Karin or Yugito. But, I've dogsat before. I figured that it can't be much different."

Idate had to cover his mouth to stop a cackle from escaping as the black haired one brooded into his collar in response to that statement.

It was then that the Raiga kid looked around the room and focused his gaze onto Idate. To be fair, they were the only people there are the moment, tea shops were primarily frequented at night and it was the early morning.

For some strange reason Raiga then turned the pink haired one around and dug his hand through her pack, which caused her to screech. He pulled out a piece of paper and held it up, turning his attention back on Idate.

He then let out a feral grin.

"Idate Morino." said Raiga. He then took the collars off of the genin trio and turned his full attention onto the now nervous Idate.

"You did a runner. I can't have you doing that when I'm supposed to guard you."

Idate didn't get the chance to make a retort when a _second Raiga_ appeared from out of nowhere. Idate felt the weight of a chop on his neck and saw only blackness.

* * *

Jirochou Wasabi wasn't _exactly_ certain how he should react to the sight in front of him, but he knew one thing at the very least.

He had blackmail for _years._

Idate, his ward, was gagged with a bright red ballgag while a trio of Konoha genin held leashes attached to a smattering of collars tied over his neck. A Kumogakure shinobi, the leader of this curious group, looked as if nothing was wrong while he snacked on a dango skewer and read Icha Icha.

"Welcome. I take it you had no trouble reaching my land?"

"Not too much." The Kumo-nin said, refusing to take his eyes off his smut. "This kid pulled a runner though. We found him by accident when we were on a break and I decided to catch him instead of let him walk."

"And the ballgag?"

"You never know when you'll need it." The Kumo-nin stated with utmost sincerity, taking his eyes off the book and placing it against his heart.

Jirochou decided he didn't much care for this shinobi.

"In any case, you understand what is expected of you?"

The Kumo-nin shook his head, "Only partly, if you don't mind could you tell me and my twerps the mission details?"

Jirochou was more surprised that the genin didn't verbally respond to his blatant insult, they merely twitched.

"I suppose it's fine. Do you know of the Todoroki Taisha dedication ceremony?"

The four shook their heads, and with a negligent wave of his hand they made themselves comfortable on his floor.

He gave a wistful smile, staring outside at the Koi pond of his manse longingly. "It all started with a legend from long ago. The lands of Ta no Kuni were, at one point in time, constantly covered in storms. Nobody could live on the land, and the towns and villages that were there prior to the storms were all razed in the chaos. Many townsfolk were horrified; they didn't have the ability to restart their trade elsewhere and would likely die come winter.

"Then, a man called Ryuka came to them. None know who exactly he was, some say he was a shinobi, some say he was a deity, but he gave the people of Ta no Kuni a chance. He gave a child a pair of metal balls and told the boy to go to the Todoroki Taisha and place the balls at the top of the shrine. Curious and willing to try anything at this point, the boy did as he was bid. Suddenly, the storms stopped. The boy was ecstatic, but he didn't fully trust myths and superstitions, and stole one of the balls. The skies were still clear, and the boy felt he was justified.

"Four years passed, and the townsfolk grew complacent. They hadn't had any storms in that timeframe, just rain and snow, and felt that their woes had passed. They didn't stock up any supplies for storms that might return, feeling that they were safe and that they already bore the wrath of the gods.

"Then, one day, the storms that they had forgotten about came back five times as strong. Winds that could rip trees from their roots, lightning that struck all around, hail the size of kunai and rain drops that were so thin and quick they made people bleed. The town cried out in anguish, none more so than the boy who had stolen one of the balls of Ryuka. He had grown into a man, and like all men should he knew that this was his fault.

"He ran from the base of the Todoroki Taisha all the way to the top, his body ragged and hurt from having to whether the storms wroth, but in the end he returned the ball at the cost of his life. The storms once more receded, and the lands became known as Ta no Kuni from what they were called – Ran no Kuni. The Land of Storm."

Jirochou calmly sipped at his tea, pointedly ignoring the mystified stares of the genin, the assessing look of the Kumo-nin, and the murderous stare of Idate, who was still bound in a ballgag.

"From then on, every four years, there has been a race from the bottom of the Todoroki Taisha to the top. It started out as a way to appease the gods, but came to be a grand festival for all of Ta no Kuni. It was a celebrated event, people young and old would race towards the top, and the winner would be named a festival hero – a great honor to our kin.

"Recently, however, the race has taken a different form. In this part of our nation, the port of Degurashi, there are two clans. We, the Wasabi family, and the long standing Wagurashi family. Though embarrassing to admit, our clans have been fighting for generations over the borders of Degurashi, both wanting to control the whole of the town. It's gotten to the point that we sometimes would get into street brawls.

"The Daimyo tolerates our bickering well enough, but he will not tolerate violence between his greater vassals within the confines of this town; his citizens were beginning to get caught in the crossfire. He struck us a bargain, one that if we didn't take we would lose our clan status. In the upcoming Todoroki Taisha dedication ceremony, there will only be two runners, one from each of our families. The clan whose runner is the winner will control Degurashi, and the loser will retreat to their lands."

He pulled out a small scroll from his vest and tossed it over to the Kumo-nin, who snatched it from midair and began to read through the papyrus with muted interest.

"The Wagurashi clan has hired a team of shinobi from Amegakure, and so we of the Wasabi clan had no choice but to counter them by hiring a team of our own. Ta no Kuni is the neighbor of Hi no Kuni, and it only makes sense that we hire from Konoha. I truly do not understand why the Wagurashi would hire from Ame-"

"Prices." Raiga stated.

"I'm sorry?"

"Ame came out of a civil war a while back and have primarily focused on rebuilding their country. Over the last year they've been expanding by doing missions with traders and noble clans in exchange for certain rights. Most likely, should the Wagurashi win, Ame would want to build a base or two of some kind in Ta no Kuni."

Jirochou rubbed his chin in thought, "While I'm not adverse to that in the slightest, I'd feel safer with a closer country and village. Konoha already has a few bases scattered about Ta no Kuni, surely it would make sense for a place like Kiri or Kumo would be smarter."

"Smarter, and that means more expensive."

"Ah." And Jirochou fully understood now. He himself was not adverse to penny pinching and going with the cheapest alternatives, but that was business.

Business mentalities did not work when it came to Shinobi Villages.

"Speaking of Kumo, if you don't mind me asking. Why are you traveling with a group of Konoha genin?"

"The new Hokages an ass." Raiga said, as if that explained everything.

It didn't, but Jirochou knew best when to ask for clarification and when to smile and nod.

He smiled and nodded.

Raiga shrugged and got up, dusting his knees off lightly, "The race is in two days, right?"

Jirochou nodded.

"Right, we'll be staying here for now, and if you don't mind could you drop off the rules and regulations of the race to our room? Me and my team need to talk strategy and it'll be a boon."

"I'll have it dropped off after supper."

* * *

The day of the race was upon them. It seemed as if the whole of Ta no Kuni was waiting at Degurashi for the race to begin in full.

"Remember," Raiga stated, holding the full attention of his temporary, and _damnit this better be temporary_ genin squad. "You will guard Jirochou while I guard Idate. There is no doubt in my mind that while people are focusing on the race, his life could be targeted. If he were to die then the Wagarashi family would gain control of the port, regardless of the outcome of the race."

Naruto looked a bit put out that he wouldn't be able to race, but both Sakura and Sasuke nodded their heads in general agreement.

The announcer began to speak, his voice echoed through the various speakers of the port. "Ladies and Gentlemen, we will be starting the Todoroki Representative Race momentarily.

"The representative for the Wasabi family, Idate Morino!"

The crowd cheered loudly as Idate rose a hand in acknowledgement; the Wasabi family politely clapping though their faces were covered in bright smiles.

"From the Wagarashi family, the messenger, Fukusuke!"

Fukusuke roared into the sky with his fist held high, the crowd only clapping halfheartedly while the whole of the Wagarashi family beat on their chests like steady drums.

"On your mark!"

Both Idate and Fukusuke took a position, the standard form for a starting sprint. The port gates opened, showing the world a small strip of stone leading out into the ocean and a pair of small, singularly handled sail boats."

"Start!"

Fukusuke and Idate bolted, and just before Idate reached the gate his leg was tugged on and he felt it snap. He fell over, looking at his leg with untold agony while Fukusuke jeered at Idate from the edge of the dock.

Idate, however, ignored all the commotion of the crowd and instead stared at his leg. Or at least, what was holding his leg. He may have been a civilian now, but he was a trained genin and he knew how to see and feel chakra. On his leg was a small, whisp-like strand of chakra that formed a tight string that was attached –

Attached the the finger of Raiga Uzumaki.

"OH NO!" Raiga said, loudly. He ran up to Idate, holding him up and shaking him wildly.

"IDATE, NO! YOU HAVE TO RUN!"

The false drama in his voice was noticeable even to the ever dense Naruto.

Jirochou stared at the scene in front of him with narrowed eyes. Was this the end?

"OH WAIT!" Raiga yelled once more. He pulled out a sheet of paper, a race regulations sheet, from his pocket and read carefully and _loudly_.

"RULE THIRTY SIX: IN THE EVENT THAT A COMPETITOR IS INCAPABLE OF RACING PRIOR TO DEPARTING FROM THE PORT OF DEGURASHI, THE COMPETITOR MAY RECEIVE AID FROM A SPONSORED GUIDE FOR THE REMAINDER OF THE RACE."

Jirochou was many things, and quick on the update was one of those many things.

 _Shinobi escort missions were also known as sponsored guides._

"I, Jirochou Wasabi, proclaim Raiga Uzumaki as a sponsored guide to my ward Idate Morino."

Raiga grinned, snatched up Idate, threw him over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and from his back came a pair of translucent Chakra Wings. They flapped once, twice, thrice, and took off at speeds far surpassing any boat in the port of Degurashi.

As they flew off there was only one thing that the whole of Ta no Kuni understood.

Shinobi were insane.

* * *

 **So, it took a while for me to come back to Plot Thief. Weird, I know, because it's my baby in a way, but i've had other things going on. Now, I know people will say that I wasn't _that_ busy, I was updating other stories.**

 **The truth is that Naruto, as a series, has begun to grow stale for me.**

 **Sad though it is, but too much of a good thing makes it sour, and Fanfiction has _too much_.**

 **Essentially, what happened was I needed a break from Naruto as a series, focus on other things, and come back to the franchise with some renewed vigor. Aye, i should have given a warning to my Hiatus, but the simple fact is is that I don't really put enough effort and energy into Fanfiction for it to truly matter.**

 **So, here we are. The Land of Tea arc is interesting because, in my humble opinion, it's the only anime arc that fits what you'd fine in the manga. To a degree. I found it interesting for certain, and after rewatching the episodes today decided that i'd finally start writing Plot Thief again.**

 **Raiga is still a dick. Naruto is still loud. Sakura and Sasuke are still minor characters in my book.**

 **All is well.**

 **If you liked this, please Favorite/Follow and send me a Review. Reviews give me the nummies.**


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